What's The Girl Equivalent Of A Nice Guy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:By "Nice Guy," I assume we're talking about the guy who hovers around a woman, pretending to be her friend, then -- not actually being so nice -- gets pissed when the woman never wants to have sex with him?

Yes. "Nice guys" aren't nice. They feel entitled to things, and they scream about being nice, but it's about getting what they "deserve," not what they actually deserve.

I agree with you. I would also add most nice guys end up to smother you if you get in a relationship with one and take things way too fast too soon. Emotional manipulators. Being “nice” is a coping strategy for lacking self-confidence. In their mind being nice will mean validation for them. What’s the female equivalent? Maybe a woman who starts nesting much too fast?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know it’s hard for bitter hard women to contemplate, but there are hot, smart, athletic, great degree/career, nice girls that are hot in the sack and totally faithful and monogamous and they do actually land the prize in their 20s and get the desirable men of similar age. They don’t need to settle for somebody’s second bits or a divorced guy or a guy with baggage or some old dude that wants a younger woman. When you gave it all, you don’t need to settle.

That's nice, but this isn't what this thread is about. If you want to discuss this, start your own.

I hope you're not a woman, seething with hatred for other women in such a way. Strong women lift up other women instead of putting them down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know it’s hard for bitter hard women to contemplate, but there are hot, smart, athletic, great degree/career, nice girls that are hot in the sack and totally faithful and monogamous and they do actually land the prize in their 20s and get the desirable men of similar age. They don’t need to settle for somebody’s second bits or a divorced guy or a guy with baggage or some old dude that wants a younger woman. When you gave it all, you don’t need to settle.

That's nice, but this isn't what this thread is about. If you want to discuss this, start your own.

I hope you're not a woman, seething with hatred for other women in such a way. Strong women lift up other women instead of putting them down.

+1
They also don’t sleep with other women’s husbands. It’s the height of hypocrisy when I hear those words come out of the mouths of women that do this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There can't really be an equivalent. Girls don't really grow up thinking that men are supposed to submit to them in some way. You might see a woman say that she is upset that she can't find a good man who is interested in her, or you might see a woman have a crush on a man that she knows doesn't like her back, but it's pretty rare to see a woman angry or surprised that a particular man isn't interested in her. Blame the patriarchy.

I think there can be, just not as common.
The girl that is at the beck and call of her male friends (watching their dogs while they vacation with hotties) and resents they aren’t the girlfriend. They “get even” by meddling in relationships, spreading rumors, etc.

This. To some extent the default setting is supposed to be “nice” for girls and there isn’t a societal benefit of being labeled “the bad girl”. So the closest equivalent is the “I’m just one of the guys, I’m not like the other girls”. They may have even hooked up with the guy friend they have a crush one tequila fueled night. They play the it’s all cool while he dates the hottie and laments/resents feeling like they are always the bridesmaid and never the bride.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know it’s hard for bitter hard women to contemplate, but there are hot, smart, athletic, great degree/career, nice girls that are hot in the sack and totally faithful and monogamous and they do actually land the prize in their 20s and get the desirable men of similar age. They don’t need to settle for somebody’s second bits or a divorced guy or a guy with baggage or some old dude that wants a younger woman. When you gave it all, you don’t need to settle.

That's nice, but this isn't what this thread is about. If you want to discuss this, start your own.

I hope you're not a woman, seething with hatred for other women in such a way. Strong women lift up other women instead of putting them down.

I find PP’s confidence refreshing. Life’s a competition and she’s determined to win. A nice girl can win and doesn’t have to settle. Nothing hateful about that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There can't really be an equivalent. Girls don't really grow up thinking that men are supposed to submit to them in some way. You might see a woman say that she is upset that she can't find a good man who is interested in her, or you might see a woman have a crush on a man that she knows doesn't like her back, but it's pretty rare to see a woman angry or surprised that a particular man isn't interested in her. Blame the patriarchy.

I think there can be, just not as common.
The girl that is at the beck and call of her male friends (watching their dogs while they vacation with hotties) and resents they aren’t the girlfriend. They “get even” by meddling in relationships, spreading rumors, etc.

This. To some extent the default setting is supposed to be “nice” for girls and there isn’t a societal benefit of being labeled “the bad girl”. So the closest equivalent is the “I’m just one of the guys, I’m not like the other girls”. They may have even hooked up with the guy friend they have a crush one tequila fueled night. They play the it’s all cool while he dates the hottie and laments/resents feeling like they are always the bridesmaid and never the bride.

Is that really a dynamic? I don't think there's really a female equivalent of being friend zoned because young men so frequently befriend women because they want to date. If you're the friend to a group of young men, at least one of them would be happy to be with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There can't really be an equivalent. Girls don't really grow up thinking that men are supposed to submit to them in some way. You might see a woman say that she is upset that she can't find a good man who is interested in her, or you might see a woman have a crush on a man that she knows doesn't like her back, but it's pretty rare to see a woman angry or surprised that a particular man isn't interested in her. Blame the patriarchy.

I think there can be, just not as common.
The girl that is at the beck and call of her male friends (watching their dogs while they vacation with hotties) and resents they aren’t the girlfriend. They “get even” by meddling in relationships, spreading rumors, etc.

This. To some extent the default setting is supposed to be “nice” for girls and there isn’t a societal benefit of being labeled “the bad girl”. So the closest equivalent is the “I’m just one of the guys, I’m not like the other girls”. They may have even hooked up with the guy friend they have a crush one tequila fueled night. They play the it’s all cool while he dates the hottie and laments/resents feeling like they are always the bridesmaid and never the bride.

Is that really a dynamic? I don't think there's really a female equivalent of being friend zoned because young men so frequently befriend women because they want to date. If you're the friend to a group of young men, at least one of them would be happy to be with you.

It’s a bad Taylor swift song-
“But she wears short skirts
I wear T-shirts
She's Cheer Captain, and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole tim”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know it’s hard for bitter hard women to contemplate, but there are hot, smart, athletic, great degree/career, nice girls that are hot in the sack and totally faithful and monogamous and they do actually land the prize in their 20s and get the desirable men of similar age. They don’t need to settle for somebody’s second bits or a divorced guy or a guy with baggage or some old dude that wants a younger woman. When you gave it all, you don’t need to settle.

That's nice, but this isn't what this thread is about. If you want to discuss this, start your own.

I hope you're not a woman, seething with hatred for other women in such a way. Strong women lift up other women instead of putting them down.

+1
They also don’t sleep with other women’s husbands. It’s the height of hypocrisy when I hear those words come out of the mouths of women that do this.

+2.
Some of us also “have it all” but the arrogance and reality of humans being flawed keeps us down to earth. PP comes off as arrogant and dismissively condescending. Not a good look.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There can't really be an equivalent. Girls don't really grow up thinking that men are supposed to submit to them in some way. You might see a woman say that she is upset that she can't find a good man who is interested in her, or you might see a woman have a crush on a man that she knows doesn't like her back, but it's pretty rare to see a woman angry or surprised that a particular man isn't interested in her. Blame the patriarchy.

I think there can be, just not as common.
The girl that is at the beck and call of her male friends (watching their dogs while they vacation with hotties) and resents they aren’t the girlfriend. They “get even” by meddling in relationships, spreading rumors, etc.

This. To some extent the default setting is supposed to be “nice” for girls and there isn’t a societal benefit of being labeled “the bad girl”. So the closest equivalent is the “I’m just one of the guys, I’m not like the other girls”. They may have even hooked up with the guy friend they have a crush one tequila fueled night. They play the it’s all cool while he dates the hottie and laments/resents feeling like they are always the bridesmaid and never the bride.

Is that really a dynamic? I don't think there's really a female equivalent of being friend zoned because young men so frequently befriend women because they want to date. If you're the friend to a group of young men, at least one of them would be happy to be with you.

I’ve been friend zoned as a woman before. In hindsight I didn’t realize the man was shy. I missed the signs. When I would ask, they would blatantly deny or laugh it off. But the signs were there. The movie “He’s Just Not That Into You” comes to mind.

[Anonymous]

Female here, but I would say No game/fat, plain or flat-chested (fill in the blank stereotype for what is attractive or not)/bland/not enticing.

Nice guys are my thing- as it means they are mentally, emotionally and financially stable- but I know when people use the term it's code for 'boring/not sexy or attractive/not interesting/no game... so that's what I think the female version would be.