I wish I’d had kids sooner

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First-time mom at 45; I am loving it. No worries, none. House is paid off. Losta retirement money. big college fund. Healthy as a horse. Fully engaged grandparents, super active in their 70s. Ski season coming up!

No way would i have had a kid prior to full financial stability.

I had everything you have, in my 20's.

[Anonymous]

I am so happy. Both my kids were in college when I was 43.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First-time mom at 45; I am loving it. No worries, none. House is paid off. Losta retirement money. big college fund. Healthy as a horse. Fully engaged grandparents, super active in their 70s. Ski season coming up!

No way would i have had a kid prior to full financial stability.

I had everything you have, in my 20's.

Your parents were in their 70s when you were in your 20s?

[Anonymous]

Cheer up, OP. I had my kids at 46, so you are a "young" Mom compared to me.

[Anonymous]

I would have been a terrible mother in my 20s. I was completely self-involved - my focus was on my career, getting various certifications, buying investment properties, and having fun with my friends in the time left over. The thought of marriage and kids and being tied down horrified me until my early 30s. In my mid-twenties I actively ghosted several perfectly nice guys when I felt like they were starting to get too serious. I married at 34, had kids at 36 and 38. Easy pregnancies, uneventful labors, quick recoveries.

I am now 40 with a preschooler and a toddler. I feel that things happened exactly the way they were supposed to, for me. I have friends who have high schoolers and will be empty nesters soon. I don't envy them or long for freedom, I am enjoying a slower-paced life and my sweet little ones.

Embrace it, OP! Make it a point to enjoy your young family instead of lamenting what could have been. Take good care of yourself. And don't forget... You are still young too. I promise when you're 60 you will look back and laugh at yourself for feeling "old" at 43. If you are in the DC area, you won't be the oldest mom on the playground, either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband's mom was 25 when she had him. She died at age 53 of cancer.

Life has no guarantees. You have thee healthy children? Count your blessings, eat your veggies and don't let life pass you by while you worry about the what ifs.

At least he had her until he was 28, not 10.

This is what I don’t get about people that argue that you could always die young so you never know.... Of course you could... but I am sure you’d prefer to have a 20 year old Child than a 10 year old...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband's mom was 25 when she had him. She died at age 53 of cancer.

Life has no guarantees. You have thee healthy children? Count your blessings, eat your veggies and don't let life pass you by while you worry about the what ifs.

At least he had her until he was 28, not 10.

This is what I don’t get about people that argue that you could always die young so you never know.... Of course you could... but I am sure you’d prefer to have a 20 year old Child than a 10 year old...

They are just trying to justify their choices and believe that they will always be healthy, because they are healthy right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First-time mom at 45; I am loving it. No worries, none. House is paid off. Losta retirement money. big college fund. Healthy as a horse. Fully engaged grandparents, super active in their 70s. Ski season coming up!

No way would i have had a kid prior to full financial stability.

I had everything you have, in my 20's.

Your parents were in their 70s when you were in your 20s?

I am the 45-year old first time mom .

I hated kids in my 20s. And in my 30s for that matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You wouldn’t have the wonderful kids you have today if you had them younger.

Now get your head out of your @ss and stop ruminating on stuff you cannot change.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had my kids are 29, 31 and 34. I have always been by far the youngest mom (often mistaken for the nanny) in all of my kids classes (first 2 kids since the third is 18 months). My kids go to private school so that might make the age difference With other parents even grater. A few of my eldest’s 1st grade parents are in their 50s and a couple is 55+. I feel very much insecure about my age and I have been referred to as “baby” more than once by other moms... it’s not fun, but I am very happy I am “young“ for my kids.

DH on the other hand, is 12 years older than me and I worry that he will be 60 with a 14 year old. DH is in great health now and his parents are healthy in their 80s so hopefully he has good genes.

Overall I Am happy I had kids “young”, but They would not have this life or these opportunities if it weren’t for my “old” husband. I was in grad school when I had my first 2...

There are a lot of trade-offs No matter what

Only here are 29-34 year old moms considered the youngest moms. I had mine at 34 and was considered old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First-time mom at 45; I am loving it. No worries, none. House is paid off. Losta retirement money. big college fund. Healthy as a horse. Fully engaged grandparents, super active in their 70s. Ski season coming up!

No way would i have had a kid prior to full financial stability.

I had everything you have, in my 20's.

Your parents were in their 70s when you were in your 20s?

I am the 45-year old first time mom .

I hated kids in my 20s. And in my 30s for that matter.

Did you just have one kid? I probably would have waited but I wanted more than one and based on family history of fertility wanted to be done by around 38.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First-time mom at 45; I am loving it. No worries, none. House is paid off. Losta retirement money. big college fund. Healthy as a horse. Fully engaged grandparents, super active in their 70s. Ski season coming up!

No way would i have had a kid prior to full financial stability.

I had everything you have, in my 20's.

Your parents were in their 70s when you were in your 20s?

No, even better. They were in their 50's but I didn't want to brag.

And WTF is losta?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First-time mom at 45; I am loving it. No worries, none. House is paid off. Losta retirement money. big college fund. Healthy as a horse. Fully engaged grandparents, super active in their 70s. Ski season coming up!

No way would i have had a kid prior to full financial stability.

I had everything you have, in my 20's.

Your parents were in their 70s when you were in your 20s?

This would be OP who had a kid at 45. HER parents are in their 70s. Tahts pretty old for this.

[Anonymous]

OP, are you prone to useless regrets? Did you regret buying a wedding dress the moment you bought it and ended up with a second one? Do you ruminate changing one of your kids names? If so, it's not about your age. There are ways to deal with it, you should look into that so that you don't raise kids prone to self-guilting and useless regrets....

[Anonymous]

Neighbor just her first -- twins at 46. First for her new hubby too. Everything looking good at that house across the street. Lotsa blue balloons in the yard.