Kid falling behind & getting wild staying at home

[Anonymous]

Unless you or your husband is high risk I would contact the daycare and see how soon she can start going again. If that’s truly a no go, hire outside help at least a few hours per day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like a parenting issue and you need to change your parenting. If she has bad manners and is undisciplined, that is a parenting issue. You cannot expect day care to parent her without you doing it at home.

PP it must be lonely and cold on your high cloud. Get down to earth. You have a toddler that needs a companionship, guidance, support and parenting.. and you choose to attack parents that are spread thin due to no fault of theirs? There is sure need for some clever solution and time management but not everyone has flexible jobs or hours.

Geeezzz...

[Anonymous]

OP, don't worry too much about academics, whatever you can catch up after work or on the weekend, try to plan ahead and prepare her in advance.. otherwise be more play based now. Whatever and no matter what you do, kids do forget most they learn during the summer months and come back to school and teachers refresh. Don't worry. Just manage your day to day struggles.

She is just 4! FOUR. It is middle of wrld pandemics. Give yourself and her slack and you all will be happier at the end.
After all.. you are all alive. This is the bright side.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What jobs do you and your dh do?

Can one of you work from 6am-1pm and the other from noon to 8pm?

Who are all these people who don’t have to work their jobs during the day? Our jobs are like OP and I had no idea it was not normal. I take a break to make lunch and come back to 90 emails. I have to work during work time. It’s not a sellers job market out there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why can't you both set a better schedule? Your child needs structure and things to look forward to during the day. I don't understand why you can't stagger your schedules so your child gets one of you ever couple of hours to go for a walk, a bike ride, eat lunch together. You take a lunch and two breaks at the office, so you can, and should do that at home with your child as well. This isn't rocket science. Your child needs your attention. She isn't a potted plant.

She already stated husband has inflexible job.. my husband as well. THAT’s why. Further - she stated all things she was already providing for and doing for her kid.. granted we can alll probably provide better schedules for our kids.. but the kid is four, and I think we’re all doing our best.

[Anonymous]

Op, your child will be fine. We hired a nanny for our kids and they are also still watching too much tv and behaving badly. They are tired of the sa,e activities and only having each other.

We are planning to send out kids back to preschool/camp. They need socialization and different activities, particularly if things will shut back down again in the fall.

Your DC will be fine - they will settle back down to old patterns when things are more normal again.

[Anonymous]

Walks, bug hunting, bubbles (have her try to burst — great for hand eye coordination), simple cooperative board games to teach rules and social skills. Lots of books, online via Epic if you don’t have a library — you can still hold her and read. Have her help around the house. She can fold simple laundry and cut with a child safe knife in kitchen. Help vacuum and dust. Toy musical instruments and dance parties. Blocks, magnatiles, clay, paint, markers. Assorted gemstones to sort. Caterpillar to butterfly kit. Baking (very simple things) — she can help mix and pour. The idea is to plan enough novelty in your time with her that she gets stimulated by new skills and activities. Otherwise she will be restless and miserable and your energy will go into dealing with that.... also, if you use screentime, show her realistic things like musical concerts, nature docs, or even read alouds of books.

[Anonymous]

A few options:
- You and your husband can stagger your hours to make more one on one time for her.
- Get her the Elmo loves ABCs/123s or Endless ABC/123s apps to help her retain her letters and numbers.
- Do you have relatives you can FaceTime with?
- Hire a high school or college student to come for 2-3 hours a day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You appear to be terrible parents

Honestly, this. She is four and you and husband let her wander around the house all day because you are busy working? I don’t care about her being bored. I care about her being safe and supervised. Please send her back to daycare. She needs actual adults in her life.

Yeah, i hate to pile on but I agree.

My kids are six and we don't let them wander the house all day! We are paying our nanny to stay home due to a health concern of hers, but we are staggering our work so that we can be there for our kids. When we both have a call at the same time we plan ahead and have an activity (even if it's just unstructured play time) for them to do. We don't just let them roam around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You appear to be terrible parents

Honestly, this. She is four and you and husband let her wander around the house all day because you are busy working? I don’t care about her being bored. I care about her being safe and supervised. Please send her back to daycare. She needs actual adults in her life.

Yeah, i hate to pile on but I agree.

My kids are six and we don't let them wander the house all day! We are paying our nanny to stay home due to a health concern of hers, but we are staggering our work so that we can be there for our kids. When we both have a call at the same time we plan ahead and have an activity (even if it's just unstructured play time) for them to do. We don't just let them roam around.

We let our six year old putter around the house and yard. He watches Netflix - mostly nature videos, does DreamBox, drives his sister's PowerWheels around the yard, waters the garden, plays with remote control cars, rides his bike, plays in the sandbox or his trampoline. If he wants to go swimming DH or I will take our laptop and sit in the covered porch by the pool to watch him while we work. Roaming builds imagination.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Walks, bug hunting, bubbles (have her try to burst — great for hand eye coordination), simple cooperative board games to teach rules and social skills. Lots of books, online via Epic if you don’t have a library — you can still hold her and read. Have her help around the house. She can fold simple laundry and cut with a child safe knife in kitchen. Help vacuum and dust. Toy musical instruments and dance parties. Blocks, magnatiles, clay, paint, markers. Assorted gemstones to sort. Caterpillar to butterfly kit. Baking (very simple things) — she can help mix and pour. The idea is to plan enough novelty in your time with her that she gets stimulated by new skills and activities. Otherwise she will be restless and miserable and your energy will go into dealing with that.... also, if you use screentime, show her realistic things like musical concerts, nature docs, or even read alouds of books.

These are all fantastic idea if there is a stay at home parent. OP’s kid is 4, and you think her child can do all these things without supervision? Blocks and magnatiles yes but walks and bug hunting? I feel like most ppl who post on this thread has no idea how it’s like to have a full time job and a small kid.

[Anonymous]

I have a 3.5 yo and it’s hard. I respect that layoffs are coming.

Look into a nanny. Your child needs to interact with someone. Have that person take her outside rain or shine.

Google Hands On As We Grow. It’s a blog with craft ideas for kids that age. Skip worksheets for now unless she asks for them. These crafts will be more fun and engaging for her.

If you don’t have LEGOs, get her a big box of Lego Classic from Lego.com. The nanny can help her create the builds in the pamphlet, and then she can have fun making up her own creations. You can also buy used Lego by the pound. Kids need at least three pounds to get started. However, the factory mix has a better selection of parts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What jobs do you and your dh do?

Can one of you work from 6am-1pm and the other from noon to 8pm?

Who are all these people who don’t have to work their jobs during the day? Our jobs are like OP and I had no idea it was not normal. I take a break to make lunch and come back to 90 emails. I have to work during work time. It’s not a sellers job market out there.

What on earth do you do? I assume you're exaggerating, but 90 emails in, what, 15 minutes? How is that possible?

And, also assuming you're in some kind of professional job, why do you put up with that crap? I sure hope I get paid less than you, but since I'm not treated like slave labor, I'll take it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our 16 year old neighbor is running an afternoon summer camp at her home . Once school is out the kids will be going daily from 12-4.

You mean an illegal unlicensed daycare?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Walks, bug hunting, bubbles (have her try to burst — great for hand eye coordination), simple cooperative board games to teach rules and social skills. Lots of books, online via Epic if you don’t have a library — you can still hold her and read. Have her help around the house. She can fold simple laundry and cut with a child safe knife in kitchen. Help vacuum and dust. Toy musical instruments and dance parties. Blocks, magnatiles, clay, paint, markers. Assorted gemstones to sort. Caterpillar to butterfly kit. Baking (very simple things) — she can help mix and pour. The idea is to plan enough novelty in your time with her that she gets stimulated by new skills and activities. Otherwise she will be restless and miserable and your energy will go into dealing with that.... also, if you use screentime, show her realistic things like musical concerts, nature docs, or even read alouds of books.

How is OP supposed to work if she has to do all of that with her kid? She can bake one cake and go for 1 walk, but she needs to work so how is her 4 year old supposed to do all of that alone?