Catholic confirmation: Were you required to "prove" mass attendance?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What bothers me about this practice is that teaches a young person to attend Mass out of duty or obligation, and does nothing to a grow a young person’s desire to attend Mass.

Yes, how ridiculous. I am a Catholic who goes every Sunday and on holy days of obligation but we do miss occasionally for travel or illnesses. This is ridiculous.

You realize it isn’t about the kids, don’t you? Most kids at this age go to Mass at the insistence of their parents, and, as evidenced here, most of you wouldn’t take your kids to Mass while traveling unless you have to. I teach religious ed, and the parking lot is full of parents who don’t take their kids to Mass.

Right- it’s because their parents do not care. They are just checking a box- making sure little Johnny does First Communion so that Grandma doesn’t have a heart attack. A large number only do the sacraments out of a vague sense of tradition or to appease extended family. The question is what to do with those people- I’m not sure there is an easy answer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What bothers me about this practice is that teaches a young person to attend Mass out of duty or obligation, and does nothing to a grow a young person’s desire to attend Mass.

Yes, how ridiculous. I am a Catholic who goes every Sunday and on holy days of obligation but we do miss occasionally for travel or illnesses. This is ridiculous.

You realize it isn’t about the kids, don’t you? Most kids at this age go to Mass at the insistence of their parents, and, as evidenced here, most of you wouldn’t take your kids to Mass while traveling unless you have to. I teach religious ed, and the parking lot is full of parents who don’t take their kids to Mass.

Right- it’s because their parents do not care. They are just checking a box- making sure little Johnny does First Communion so that Grandma doesn’t have a heart attack. A large number only do the sacraments out of a vague sense of tradition or to appease extended family. The question is what to do with those people- I’m not sure there is an easy answer.

It would be dificult, because the Church doesn't want to lose the money it makes from this type of family, even though the church does not approve of the family's behavior.

[Anonymous]

Two thoughts: The church shouldn't deny communion to a child because their parent isn't as "good" as they would like. We don't deny children food and care because their parents aren't great. The parents are the stewards but you shouldn't punish a child for having a lousy steward.

Second: You shouldn't have to 'prove' mass attendance. It is working on the assumption that the child is a liar. Not the best set up for that kind of a scenario. I'd favor a situation where you reminded the child of their obligations, remind them that lying is wrong and expect the best. I don't think Jesus would be checking church attendance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Two thoughts: The church shouldn't deny communion to a child because their parent isn't as "good" as they would like. We don't deny children food and care because their parents aren't great. The parents are the stewards but you shouldn't punish a child for having a lousy steward.

Second: You shouldn't have to 'prove' mass attendance. It is working on the assumption that the child is a liar. Not the best set up for that kind of a scenario. I'd favor a situation where you reminded the child of their obligations, remind them that lying is wrong and expect the best. I don't think Jesus would be checking church attendance.

It's the parents' responsibility to take the child to church and the parents who would take the children (or not) to an out-of-town church when away from home, and the parents who are expected to get the signature of the priest in the other town. Thus it is the parents who are lying and driving the child to sin -- missing mass and lying.

The priest can only be in contact with any child through the child's parents and it is the parents who are trying to cheat their way to the child's communion. Do you expect the priest to ask the child if they lied for their parents?

Not a good example to the child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have never heard of this and this practice would make me switch parishes. We are in MD and have class and service requirements for Confirmation candidates and it is a two year program. This is enough.

You technically can’t switch parishes for sacraments without the permission of your territorial parish priest.

Dp- we changed parishes and had no issue registering the kids for school or receiving sacraments. It probably depends on the parish.

NP here - if you changed parishes then of course you can register your kids for the school and sacarmental prep at your new parish. But if you are the member of one parish but want to send your kids to sacramental prep at another parish, you have to get the permission of the pastor of the church where you are registered. We've done it and it was no big deal.

[Anonymous]

Wow, I had 4 confirmed by a very uptight, conservative priest in Arlington and we did not have to prove mass attendance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What bothers me about this practice is that teaches a young person to attend Mass out of duty or obligation, and does nothing to a grow a young person’s desire to attend Mass.

Yes, how ridiculous. I am a Catholic who goes every Sunday and on holy days of obligation but we do miss occasionally for travel or illnesses. This is ridiculous.

You realize it isn’t about the kids, don’t you? Most kids at this age go to Mass at the insistence of their parents, and, as evidenced here, most of you wouldn’t take your kids to Mass while traveling unless you have to. I teach religious ed, and the parking lot is full of parents who don’t take their kids to Mass.

Right- it’s because their parents do not care. They are just checking a box- making sure little Johnny does First Communion so that Grandma doesn’t have a heart attack. A large number only do the sacraments out of a vague sense of tradition or to appease extended family. The question is what to do with those people- I’m not sure there is an easy answer.

You post a version of this on just about every thread on Christianity. It’s not true. But apparently you’d just love for it to be true. What gives?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What bothers me about this practice is that teaches a young person to attend Mass out of duty or obligation, and does nothing to a grow a young person’s desire to attend Mass.

Yes, how ridiculous. I am a Catholic who goes every Sunday and on holy days of obligation but we do miss occasionally for travel or illnesses. This is ridiculous.

You realize it isn’t about the kids, don’t you? Most kids at this age go to Mass at the insistence of their parents, and, as evidenced here, most of you wouldn’t take your kids to Mass while traveling unless you have to. I teach religious ed, and the parking lot is full of parents who don’t take their kids to Mass.

Right- it’s because their parents do not care. They are just checking a box- making sure little Johnny does First Communion so that Grandma doesn’t have a heart attack. A large number only do the sacraments out of a vague sense of tradition or to appease extended family. The question is what to do with those people- I’m not sure there is an easy answer.

You post a version of this on just about every thread on Christianity. It’s not true. But apparently you’d just love for it to be true. What gives?

You must be the one who follows these threads so closely that you think you know repeats themselves. What gives?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two thoughts: The church shouldn't deny communion to a child because their parent isn't as "good" as they would like. We don't deny children food and care because their parents aren't great. The parents are the stewards but you shouldn't punish a child for having a lousy steward.

Second: You shouldn't have to 'prove' mass attendance. It is working on the assumption that the child is a liar. Not the best set up for that kind of a scenario. I'd favor a situation where you reminded the child of their obligations, remind them that lying is wrong and expect the best. I don't think Jesus would be checking church attendance.

It's the parents' responsibility to take the child to church and the parents who would take the children (or not) to an out-of-town church when away from home, and the parents who are expected to get the signature of the priest in the other town. Thus it is the parents who are lying and driving the child to sin -- missing mass and lying.

The priest can only be in contact with any child through the child's parents and it is the parents who are trying to cheat their way to the child's communion. Do you expect the priest to ask the child if they lied for their parents?

Not a good example to the child.

So you are ok denying the sacraments to a child even when it isn't their fault? How very Christian of you.

[Anonymous]

Lots of people here with lots of excuses for not going to Mass regularly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two thoughts: The church shouldn't deny communion to a child because their parent isn't as "good" as they would like. We don't deny children food and care because their parents aren't great. The parents are the stewards but you shouldn't punish a child for having a lousy steward.

Second: You shouldn't have to 'prove' mass attendance. It is working on the assumption that the child is a liar. Not the best set up for that kind of a scenario. I'd favor a situation where you reminded the child of their obligations, remind them that lying is wrong and expect the best. I don't think Jesus would be checking church attendance.

It's the parents' responsibility to take the child to church and the parents who would take the children (or not) to an out-of-town church when away from home, and the parents who are expected to get the signature of the priest in the other town. Thus it is the parents who are lying and driving the child to sin -- missing mass and lying.

The priest can only be in contact with any child through the child's parents and it is the parents who are trying to cheat their way to the child's communion. Do you expect the priest to ask the child if they lied for their parents?

Not a good example to the child.

So you are ok denying the sacraments to a child even when it isn't their fault? How very Christian of you.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two thoughts: The church shouldn't deny communion to a child because their parent isn't as "good" as they would like. We don't deny children food and care because their parents aren't great. The parents are the stewards but you shouldn't punish a child for having a lousy steward.

Second: You shouldn't have to 'prove' mass attendance. It is working on the assumption that the child is a liar. Not the best set up for that kind of a scenario. I'd favor a situation where you reminded the child of their obligations, remind them that lying is wrong and expect the best. I don't think Jesus would be checking church attendance.

It's the parents' responsibility to take the child to church and the parents who would take the children (or not) to an out-of-town church when away from home, and the parents who are expected to get the signature of the priest in the other town. Thus it is the parents who are lying and driving the child to sin -- missing mass and lying.

The priest can only be in contact with any child through the child's parents and it is the parents who are trying to cheat their way to the child's communion. Do you expect the priest to ask the child if they lied for their parents?

Not a good example to the child.

So you are ok denying the sacraments to a child even when it isn't their fault? How very Christian of you.

In the situation we're discussing, the child is old enough to know that missing mass is a mortal sin. It doesn't matter whose "fault" it is - if you miss mass, you miss mass. Like if you fell down vs your parents pushed you down -- you'd still have bruises that need treatment.

Of course, even a confirmation-age child would not go to hell for parental sins that the child couldn't control, but to be a Catholic in good standing, the child would have to go to confession, go to communion and attend mass regularly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, are you in VA?

Yes! Do you go to my church?

We will be out of town next weekend and I'm nervous about approaching the priest at a local parish for an "autographed bulletin!" I was wondering if this will be something he's used to seeing, or will we need to go into a whole long explanation about why we need him to sign?

FWIW, I don't think it's a very "Catholic area" because most of the local parishes only have one or two Sunday masses. Our Parish here in VA has 4 in English and 1 in Latin on Sundays (I think they also have a Spanish mass)

. We used to be at a very conservative parish in Northern VA. My kids had to prove their mass attendance. We received the strangest look from a parish priest when we had to get the "sign-off" that they attended.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lots of people here with lots of excuses for not going to Mass regularly.

There are many excuses for missing mass - some good, some bad. Choosing out-of-town Sunday sports over mass and lying about it is not a good excuse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have never heard of this and this practice would make me switch parishes. We are in MD and have class and service requirements for Confirmation candidates and it is a two year program. This is enough.

You technically can’t switch parishes for sacraments without the permission of your territorial parish priest.

. This very much depends upon the priest. A lot of parishioners jumped ship at our former Northern VA parish when an ultra conservative priest was assigned many years ago. There was a very loving priest at a nearby parish (now deceased) who accepted all who wanted to worship. We formally registered at the new parish and in theory transferred membership. I say in theory because we still received donation envelopes from the old parish monthly even after I reminded them that we were no longer parishioners.