Beach Week - Any BTDT parents from the area have advice?

[Anonymous]

I used to think the “they’ll be in college soon” was a good argument but the truth is college has a lot of responsibility to go with the freedom— no one is saying “here’s a week to do nothing but drink and f***”.

Spring break can be like that but a lot of growth happens in the first 6 months and a lot of freshmen dont even go awY for spring break.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it hilarious that many parents are not ok with their kids going to beach week.

Spring break in the 1970s and 1980’s was just as bad many kids were underage then as well because most parents in those days did not hold their children back from starting school. There were many 17 year olds as college freshman participating.

I get it if your kid has not shown signs of being responsible, but also part of me is they are going to be college freshman are parents going to college with them?

The drinking age in 1979 was 18.

College is not comparable to beach week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I used to think the “they’ll be in college soon” was a good argument but the truth is college has a lot of responsibility to go with the freedom— no one is saying “here’s a week to do nothing but drink and f***”.

Spring break can be like that but a lot of growth happens in the first 6 months and a lot of freshmen dont even go awY for spring break.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Even if, for many kids, the week turns out fine, why foster this? Why foster this indulgence?

I agree. It’s just a terrible idea all around and I don’t know why anyone would indulge it.

[Anonymous]

PP 80s FCPS:

I recall driving my mother to some OC MD rental office. My mom had to sign for our rental apartment because I was only 17.

I have no idea why I was in charge of this arrangement.

It was a week of debauchery. One friend's military officer father made a point to purchase all the alcohol (era of Ca Coolers) *for* his daughter to transport AND share. We started the week with a fridge full of Ca Coolers and Budweiser. Word spread quickly and boys from our high school invaded and drank most of it all immediately. None of us had fake ids but we never ran out of alcohol. Our apartment became the party place.

My boyfriend got kicked out of his motel the second night and so he moved in with us. Another friend met some random guys on the beach and invited them to crash in our apartment overnight. This was all by day 3.

This all takes on a new (horrifying) meaning as a parent. It's hard being a hypocrite or feeling like one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find it hilarious that many parents are not ok with their kids going to beach week.

Spring break in the 1970s and 1980’s was just as bad many kids were underage then as well because most parents in those days did not hold their children back from starting school. There were many 17 year olds as college freshman participating.

I get it if your kid has not shown signs of being responsible, but also part of me is they are going to be college freshman are parents going to college with them?

The drinking age in 1979 was 18.

College is not comparable to beach week.

There were not “many 17 year olds” participating in college spring break in thr 80s and 90s! First, college freshman were 18 by spring if not 19. Second, most college freshmen didn’t participate in spring break. It was mostly upperclassmen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find it hilarious that many parents are not ok with their kids going to beach week.

Spring break in the 1970s and 1980’s was just as bad many kids were underage then as well because most parents in those days did not hold their children back from starting school. There were many 17 year olds as college freshman participating.

I get it if your kid has not shown signs of being responsible, but also part of me is they are going to be college freshman are parents going to college with them?

The drinking age in 1979 was 18.

College is not comparable to beach week.

There were not “many 17 year olds” participating in college spring break in thr 80s and 90s! First, college freshman were 18 by spring if not 19. Second, most college freshmen didn’t participate in spring break. It was mostly upperclassmen.

My HS the richer kids did Spring break Cancun where drinking age was 16. Florida was 18 at time so for college kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Spring break in the 80s and 90s was a college event not a high school event. I’m from the midwest and cannot believe that the beach week tradition for high schoolers exists here! We had nothing similar. This is crazy!

My guess is because you didn't live near beaches?

You’re not much for thinking. A “similar” tradition doesn’t need an ocean— could be a lake house, camping in the woods ... understand?

Camping in the woods. LOL . Okay

[Anonymous]

I grew up in NJ and we went to Prom Beach weekend for Memorial Day and Beach week for Senior year in mid June. Tons of fun. Older siblings always got the alcohol. We always purchased great houses that you only needed to be 18 to sign. Had a ton a fun. Great tans on the beach, meeting A LOT of other seniors and connections with other schools. Drank some, but it was just the hanging out and the memories. Still closer with my high school friends than my college ones.

I wouldn't sign any leases for my kids, but they will be allowed to go. It certainly seems like kids these days drink and party a lot less than we did in high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Even if, for many kids, the week turns out fine, why foster this? Why foster this indulgence?

It’s a vacation with friends. Have you never done this?

[Anonymous]

Just make sure you tell your kids to get rid of all cleaners with bleach ……..
friend spilled something last year and they tried to use this cleaner on the couch....,

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Even if, for many kids, the week turns out fine, why foster this? Why foster this indulgence?

It’s a vacation with friends. Have you never done this?

That's like calling a frat party a get-together. It's true, but it isn't really accurate.

[Anonymous]

One child has already done it and second will go this year. Rental house near beach with a pool and parents staying on site. Tight friend group, not boy crazy or party kids. Just going to have a giant multi day slumber party before disbursing to many colleges. They have been infinitely trustworthy up to now and I feel confident they’ll be fine.

If I had drinkers or partiers? No way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP 80s FCPS:

I recall driving my mother to some OC MD rental office. My mom had to sign for our rental apartment because I was only 17.

I have no idea why I was in charge of this arrangement.

It was a week of debauchery. One friend's military officer father made a point to purchase all the alcohol (era of Ca Coolers) *for* his daughter to transport AND share. We started the week with a fridge full of Ca Coolers and Budweiser. Word spread quickly and boys from our high school invaded and drank most of it all immediately. None of us had fake ids but we never ran out of alcohol. Our apartment became the party place.

My boyfriend got kicked out of his motel the second night and so he moved in with us. Another friend met some random guys on the beach and invited them to crash in our apartment overnight. This was all by day 3.

This all takes on a new (horrifying) meaning as a parent. It's hard being a hypocrite or feeling like one.

Understanding the significant problems in the approach your parents took, and making different choices for your own kids is not "being a hypocrite."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MCPS kids go to all the beaches you mentioned.

I allowed my children. They are going off to college in the fall and if they are not ready by beach week, well.

But, big but if they have not shown good judgement before going beach week is not required.

My advice is to drive them down and pick them up. Yes, a pain .But should now no risk to drinking and driving.

I liked them having a house in Rehoboth or Bethany vs Ocean City. Less people to deal with, higher chance they will drink at their place than on the boardwalk.

Send lots of snacks. Parents usually divide up. I felt if mine were going they should go to grocery store and plan themselves.

The need to leave the house they rent in the same condition they found it in or it comes out of their monies.

My kids stayed at their friends parents beach houses or ours so no advice there.

Remind them many times the police are going to issue citations for open alcohol and drinking in public. If they are going to drink need to do it at the house.

This is great advice. You need to know that beach week is a bender. It's drinking drinking drinking. Yes, even your kid. If your kid is experienced with drinking, knows their limits, etc. then it's fine. If your kid doesn't have experience with parties, drunk friends, potentially dangerous situations, etc... it's a no go.

If you kid i an experienced drinker before high school graduation, beach week may be "fine" but you're a failure as a parent. (Yes, I know kids drink, I'm not disputing that. But "experienced drinker" is a whole different category.)