Beach Week - Any BTDT parents from the area have advice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is going, but it’s our house and DH will be the chaperone the entire time.

That would be ideal, but the couple of parents with beach houses are not offering (which is understandable). I've heard that some groups have a parent or two chaperoning sometimes. How did that work out having a parent there?

Parent has to be there. Parent has to sign leases and take full responsibility.

A parent has to sign the lease, but there is not generally a requirement that the parent be on site. What we did, same as most people we know, is first have a meeting with parents to make sure everyone agreed on rules, then require the boys to attend the presentation the DE and Ocean City police put on about Beach Week and its perils. We had one parent pick up the key and take photos of the place (in Dewey) before the boys arrived, and another couple to supervise their clean-up efforts. We also had parent volunteers stay in the area (several had beach houses) so there was at least one local parent at all times.

I would not have permitted my son to go if he and his friends had not have a good track record of being responsible. There were some houses where bad things happened, but our group didn’t do anything worse than drinking. Their landlady lived in the apartment above the beach house and gave them great reviews. They left the place in great condition and we got the entire deposit back.

We were dreading it, but it turned out fine. The kids were very grateful we let them go.

Do these parents also purchase the beer for their underage kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is going, but it’s our house and DH will be the chaperone the entire time.

That would be ideal, but the couple of parents with beach houses are not offering (which is understandable). I've heard that some groups have a parent or two chaperoning sometimes. How did that work out having a parent there?

Parent has to be there. Parent has to sign leases and take full responsibility.

A parent has to sign the lease, but there is not generally a requirement that the parent be on site. What we did, same as most people we know, is first have a meeting with parents to make sure everyone agreed on rules, then require the boys to attend the presentation the DE and Ocean City police put on about Beach Week and its perils. We had one parent pick up the key and take photos of the place (in Dewey) before the boys arrived, and another couple to supervise their clean-up efforts. We also had parent volunteers stay in the area (several had beach houses) so there was at least one local parent at all times.

I would not have permitted my son to go if he and his friends had not have a good track record of being responsible. There were some houses where bad things happened, but our group didn’t do anything worse than drinking. Their landlady lived in the apartment above the beach house and gave them great reviews. They left the place in great condition and we got the entire deposit back.

We were dreading it, but it turned out fine. The kids were very grateful we let them go.

Do these parents also purchase the beer for their underage kids?

We didn’t, nor did any parents in our beach house. I have no clue where the alcohol came from.

[Anonymous]

Both of my (now adult) kids turned 18 in August after they graduated. Both wanted to go to beach week but my H and I decided against it. As I told them then, as someone under 18 if you happened to get arrested I would have to drive hours, probably in the middle of the night, to bail you out. I'm not about to do that. So you can wait until your birthday and then go to the beach if you want and if they call me then to tell me you are in jail I will likely tell them to tell you I said hi and to get in touch again when you are out of jail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Both of my (now adult) kids turned 18 in August after they graduated. Both wanted to go to beach week but my H and I decided against it. As I told them then, as someone under 18 if you happened to get arrested I would have to drive hours, probably in the middle of the night, to bail you out. I'm not about to do that. So you can wait until your birthday and then go to the beach if you want and if they call me then to tell me you are in jail I will likely tell them to tell you I said hi and to get in touch again when you are out of jail.

I let mine go because they were 18. Had the same discussion. The discussion pertains to college as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is going, but it’s our house and DH will be the chaperone the entire time.

That would be ideal, but the couple of parents with beach houses are not offering (which is understandable). I've heard that some groups have a parent or two chaperoning sometimes. How did that work out having a parent there?

Parent has to be there. Parent has to sign leases and take full responsibility.

A parent has to sign the lease, but there is not generally a requirement that the parent be on site. What we did, same as most people we know, is first have a meeting with parents to make sure everyone agreed on rules, then require the boys to attend the presentation the DE and Ocean City police put on about Beach Week and its perils. We had one parent pick up the key and take photos of the place (in Dewey) before the boys arrived, and another couple to supervise their clean-up efforts. We also had parent volunteers stay in the area (several had beach houses) so there was at least one local parent at all times.

I would not have permitted my son to go if he and his friends had not have a good track record of being responsible. There were some houses where bad things happened, but our group didn’t do anything worse than drinking. Their landlady lived in the apartment above the beach house and gave them great reviews. They left the place in great condition and we got the entire deposit back.

We were dreading it, but it turned out fine. The kids were very grateful we let them go.

Do these parents also purchase the beer for their underage kids?

There are tons of parents that do that yes.

Not saying it is right. It's part of the mentality that their darling child should not be left out. No different than weekends at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MCPS kids go to all the beaches you mentioned.

I allowed my children. They are going off to college in the fall and if they are not ready by beach week, well.

But, big but if they have not shown good judgement before going beach week is not required.

My advice is to drive them down and pick them up. Yes, a pain .But should now no risk to drinking and driving.

I liked them having a house in Rehoboth or Bethany vs Ocean City. Less people to deal with, higher chance they will drink at their place than on the boardwalk.

Send lots of snacks. Parents usually divide up. I felt if mine were going they should go to grocery store and plan themselves.

The need to leave the house they rent in the same condition they found it in or it comes out of their monies.

My kids stayed at their friends parents beach houses or ours so no advice there.

Remind them many times the police are going to issue citations for open alcohol and drinking in public. If they are going to drink need to do it at the house.

I agree with this but I prefer Ocean City.

There is public transportation. They plan activities. They have been doing this for decades. More non drinking stuff to do.

Nobody is 'drinking on the boardwalk"

They might go to the boardwalk one time but OC is 150+ streets most kids don't stay near the boardwalk or go there unless they do the volleyball tournament.

Agreed public transportation and activities in OC exceed the other places.

Disagree on OC boardwalk

Our high school MCPS last year had four kids cited on the boardwalk. Year before at least 7. In 2015 a fight broke out on the boardwalk, cited and arrested five boys. It' all public record MD casesearch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is going, but it’s our house and DH will be the chaperone the entire time.

That would be ideal, but the couple of parents with beach houses are not offering (which is understandable). I've heard that some groups have a parent or two chaperoning sometimes. How did that work out having a parent there?

Parent has to be there. Parent has to sign leases and take full responsibility.

A parent has to sign the lease, but there is not generally a requirement that the parent be on site. What we did, same as most people we know, is first have a meeting with parents to make sure everyone agreed on rules, then require the boys to attend the presentation the DE and Ocean City police put on about Beach Week and its perils. We had one parent pick up the key and take photos of the place (in Dewey) before the boys arrived, and another couple to supervise their clean-up efforts. We also had parent volunteers stay in the area (several had beach houses) so there was at least one local parent at all times.

I would not have permitted my son to go if he and his friends had not have a good track record of being responsible. There were some houses where bad things happened, but our group didn’t do anything worse than drinking. Their landlady lived in the apartment above the beach house and gave them great reviews. They left the place in great condition and we got the entire deposit back.

We were dreading it, but it turned out fine. The kids were very grateful we let them go.

Do these parents also purchase the beer for their underage kids?

We didn’t, nor did any parents in our beach house. I have no clue where the alcohol came from.

Not sure that’s any better....

[Anonymous]

Former OC lifeguard who spent many a summer dealing with drunk senior weekers. I spent my senior week guarding so I couldn't party all night like my classmates and I was VERY grateful to have my parents' house to go home to at the end of the night.

A) I agree with other posters - don't sign a rental agreement for your kids unless you're going to be there. It's a disaster waiting to happen.

B) Do your best to have your kids stay above 48th street. Areas to the south are targeted by police as is 94th street and 116th.

C) Tell your kids that nobody is fooled by the backpack at 10pm on the bus - we all know it's alcohol.

D) Tell your kids to NOT go swimming after lifeguards go off duty. We pulled enough drunk kids out on duty and had at least one senior weeker drown at night. Took two weeks to recover the poor guy's body.

E) I don't know that I would let my kid go unless there was an adult staying at their rental. Campus police are much more forgiving with underage drinking than OC police. They do not play around.

[Anonymous]

OP

You are going to get a ton of responses that will be extreme from one side to the other.

You know your kid. Every family is different.

Beach week is not a requirement. No one's life is going to be ruined, because they did not go to beach week.

Other side of coin.

Kids are leaving for college in the fall. If they can not handle a week at the beach with their friends, well college is not going to be easy either.

Yes, it is a week of over drinking for many kids.

Some parents make their kids pay their own way.

Some parents provide alcohol.

Some parents stay in units near their kids, some do not.

Some kids feel left out because they want to go and do not have a group to go with.

There are so many ways to look at this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MCPS kids go to all the beaches you mentioned.

I allowed my children. They are going off to college in the fall and if they are not ready by beach week, well.

But, big but if they have not shown good judgement before going beach week is not required.

My advice is to drive them down and pick them up. Yes, a pain .But should now no risk to drinking and driving.

I liked them having a house in Rehoboth or Bethany vs Ocean City. Less people to deal with, higher chance they will drink at their place than on the boardwalk.

Send lots of snacks. Parents usually divide up. I felt if mine were going they should go to grocery store and plan themselves.

The need to leave the house they rent in the same condition they found it in or it comes out of their monies.

My kids stayed at their friends parents beach houses or ours so no advice there.

Remind them many times the police are going to issue citations for open alcohol and drinking in public. If they are going to drink need to do it at the house.

I agree with this but I prefer Ocean City.

There is public transportation. They plan activities. They have been doing this for decades. More non drinking stuff to do.

Nobody is 'drinking on the boardwalk"

They might go to the boardwalk one time but OC is 150+ streets most kids don't stay near the boardwalk or go there unless they do the volleyball tournament.

Agreed public transportation and activities in OC exceed the other places.

Disagree on OC boardwalk

Our high school MCPS last year had four kids cited on the boardwalk. Year before at least 7. In 2015 a fight broke out on the boardwalk, cited and arrested five boys. It' all public record MD casesearch.

Some kids do most dont.

I agree with t he lifeguard stay between 40-100 avoid the areas he mentioned.

Do NOT try to get into Seacrets!

[Anonymous]

Sorry, bad idea all around. Neither of my kids went to beach week. One decided on a Disney vacation with a few friends and the other was planning to go for a day or two, but decided not to go. If they really want a last "hurrah" with their friends then they can find lots of alternatives to OC, Dewey and Rehoboth (though I doubt many go there). One friend allowed her daughter and a few friends to stay at their beach house in the Outer Banks. They had a great time and there was no drama. Even the police in OC and Dewey tell parents not to let their kids do beach week.

[Anonymous]

I've gotten as far as telling my kid (a junior) that it's prudent to avoid places with lots of drunk people, even if you yourself (or you and your friends) have good judgment and are sober.

I'm hoping that the kid will save me some decisions by deciding on their own not to go...

[Anonymous]

I must be the same age as the former OC lifeguard since I know that week as "Senior Week". Do hotels no longer rent to seniors? Most of my classmates and I stayed in the boardwalk hotels. Times change, and knowing my own experience, I wonder how I'll feel in 5 years when I have a senior. Yikes! Best of luck to those parents currently going through this tough choice.

[Anonymous]

I allowed my 3rd kid to do beach week; older two had no interest. DS and friends rented a place in NC--specifically found a place that was willing to rent to 19+. All parents set ground rules with kids before leaving--no stupidity, no rowdiness, no drinking and driving. Asked for once daily check in so we knew that they were alive. Yes, they drank. Probably smoked some weed. They also had a great time, solidified friendships and learned some valuable lessons about taking care of themselves.
I agree with the posters that point out these kids will be going to college soon. You have to give them opportunities to be on their own and to self-regulate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I must be the same age as the former OC lifeguard since I know that week as "Senior Week". Do hotels no longer rent to seniors? Most of my classmates and I stayed in the boardwalk hotels. Times change, and knowing my own experience, I wonder how I'll feel in 5 years when I have a senior. Yikes! Best of luck to those parents currently going through this tough choice.

PP here who was the OC lifeguard. I'm 32 so I have about 14 more years until my oldest goes to "Senior/Beach week". I feel like when my classmates had hotels their parents had signed for them or put the deposit down. I know on my parents street kids get kicked out of the rental condos every week in June. Last year some drunk kids ripped a fire extinguisher off the wall, took into the condo and sprayed it all over the place as revenge for being kicked out of a party. Complete nonsense.