Beach Week - Any BTDT parents from the area have advice?

[Anonymous]

I find it hilarious that many parents are not ok with their kids going to beach week.

Spring break in the 1970s and 1980’s was just as bad many kids were underage then as well because most parents in those days did not hold their children back from starting school. There were many 17 year olds as college freshman participating.

I get it if your kid has not shown signs of being responsible, but also part of me is they are going to be college freshman are parents going to college with them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it hilarious that many parents are not ok with their kids going to beach week.

Spring break in the 1970s and 1980’s was just as bad many kids were underage then as well because most parents in those days did not hold their children back from starting school. There were many 17 year olds as college freshman participating.

I get it if your kid has not shown signs of being responsible, but also part of me is they are going to be college freshman are parents going to college with them?

Parents in 2020 should let their kids go to beach week because spring break in the 1970s and 80s was just as bad?

[Anonymous]

I'm not worried about drinking--I'm worried about rape.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not worried about drinking--I'm worried about rape.

They're not unrelated. https://www.alcohol.org/effects/sexual-assault-college-campus/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find it hilarious that many parents are not ok with their kids going to beach week.

Spring break in the 1970s and 1980’s was just as bad many kids were underage then as well because most parents in those days did not hold their children back from starting school. There were many 17 year olds as college freshman participating.

I get it if your kid has not shown signs of being responsible, but also part of me is they are going to be college freshman are parents going to college with them?

Parents in 2020 should let their kids go to beach week because spring break in the 1970s and 80s was just as bad?

No, I think people know their children.

If your child is not ready for beach week, good luck with college five hours from home. They have to grow up and make decisions. If you are worried your DC is going to drink too much why are you sending them.

Beach week isn’t the issue , personal responsibility is. Beach is also not a requirement and parents obsess over it.

[Anonymous]

Spring break in the 80s and 90s was a college event not a high school event. I’m from the midwest and cannot believe that the beach week tradition for high schoolers exists here! We had nothing similar. This is crazy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is going, but it’s our house and DH will be the chaperone the entire time.

That would be ideal, but the couple of parents with beach houses are not offering (which is understandable). I've heard that some groups have a parent or two chaperoning sometimes. How did that work out having a parent there?

Parent has to be there. Parent has to sign leases and take full responsibility.

A parent has to sign the lease, but there is not generally a requirement that the parent be on site. What we did, same as most people we know, is first have a meeting with parents to make sure everyone agreed on rules, then require the boys to attend the presentation the DE and Ocean City police put on about Beach Week and its perils. We had one parent pick up the key and take photos of the place (in Dewey) before the boys arrived, and another couple to supervise their clean-up efforts. We also had parent volunteers stay in the area (several had beach houses) so there was at least one local parent at all times.

I would not have permitted my son to go if he and his friends had not have a good track record of being responsible. There were some houses where bad things happened, but our group didn’t do anything worse than drinking. Their landlady lived in the apartment above the beach house and gave them great reviews. They left the place in great condition and we got the entire deposit back.

We were dreading it, but it turned out fine. The kids were very grateful we let them go.

This sounds very similar to what we did, although in our case a couple of the kids were over 18, and therefore adults, at the time they signed the lease and the landlord was okay with that. It was actually good because those kids had a vested interest in things going well. And like yours they got their full deposit back. 2 moms ended up staying in the next town for the week because one of them had a house there and they stopped in a couple of times.

Overall the week was fine, all the kids came back unscathed, and I don't think there were any citations on any of the kids from DCs school that week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spring break in the 80s and 90s was a college event not a high school event. I’m from the midwest and cannot believe that the beach week tradition for high schoolers exists here! We had nothing similar. This is crazy!

Beach week is for seniors same age as college freshman
. Many are actually older than college freshman in those prior years.

I grew up in Fort Lauderdale. There is no difference except now there are cell phones and kids do not sleep on the beach or in cars they get fancy houses that their parents pay for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS is going, but it’s our house and DH will be the chaperone the entire time.

The whole time? Sorry, but that is super lame. They are adults. Will he be chaperoning his college life too. His roommate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spring break in the 80s and 90s was a college event not a high school event. I’m from the midwest and cannot believe that the beach week tradition for high schoolers exists here! We had nothing similar. This is crazy!

My guess is because you didn't live near beaches?

[Anonymous]

My daughter and her 5 friends went and none of them drank. They literally just went to the beach and hung out and watched movies/played games. They went to the under 21 club one time and drove from Bethany to Ocean City. Hated it and left pretty quick. It isn't their scene. She is halfway thru college and has only drank a few times. A lot of kids smoke since it is legal in MA, but she doesn't. She is wound up about getting high grades for an internship that needs at 3.7 GPA or higher. Sometimes I wish she would smoke a joint. She needs to chill sometimes. My other daughter is a junior and she is a little more laxed, but again not a partier and barely goes out.

I would never sign lease or buy alcohol for kids, but I also let me kids know consequences and trust them until they can not be trusted. Maybe that is why my kids just don't think it is a big deal or try to hang out with people that are always trying to be cool or prove something.

You always hear about the terrible kids at beach week. You have to have an idea if your kid is a wanna be. If so, I would be a bit more uptight about it. But for the most part, 90% of the kids are just fine and have a great time at Beach Week

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spring break in the 80s and 90s was a college event not a high school event. I’m from the midwest and cannot believe that the beach week tradition for high schoolers exists here! We had nothing similar. This is crazy!

DH and I are both FCPS grads from the mid80s. It was Ocean City for Beach Week, immediately after graduation. Our younger siblings from the later 80s started to break with tradition and headed for the OBX.

Our decidely "unpopular" (she'd say "misfit") DD went to Beach Week w 3 friends in 2017 but stayed in a relative's 2BR rental condo in Fenwick-somewhat away from the action. There was drinking. One girl up and left after the first night; there were arguments. DD would say it wasn't very much fun. She is no longer in contact or friends with her Beach Week companions. I guess we gave her some leeway here figuring that she'd soon be off to college.

Next up; DS16 who is more social and more daring. I don't know what we'll encourage or discourage his senior year.

[Anonymous]

Even if, for many kids, the week turns out fine, why foster this? Why foster this indulgence?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Spring break in the 80s and 90s was a college event not a high school event. I’m from the midwest and cannot believe that the beach week tradition for high schoolers exists here! We had nothing similar. This is crazy!

My guess is because you didn't live near beaches?

You’re not much for thinking. A “similar” tradition doesn’t need an ocean— could be a lake house, camping in the woods ... understand?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is going, but it’s our house and DH will be the chaperone the entire time.

That would be ideal, but the couple of parents with beach houses are not offering (which is understandable). I've heard that some groups have a parent or two chaperoning sometimes. How did that work out having a parent there?

Parent has to be there. Parent has to sign leases and take full responsibility.

A parent has to sign the lease, but there is not generally a requirement that the parent be on site. What we did, same as most people we know, is first have a meeting with parents to make sure everyone agreed on rules, then require the boys to attend the presentation the DE and Ocean City police put on about Beach Week and its perils. We had one parent pick up the key and take photos of the place (in Dewey) before the boys arrived, and another couple to supervise their clean-up efforts. We also had parent volunteers stay in the area (several had beach houses) so there was at least one local parent at all times.

I would not have permitted my son to go if he and his friends had not have a good track record of being responsible. There were some houses where bad things happened, but our group didn’t do anything worse than drinking. Their landlady lived in the apartment above the beach house and gave them great reviews. They left the place in great condition and we got the entire deposit back.

We were dreading it, but it turned out fine. The kids were very grateful we let them go.

Do these parents also purchase the beer for their underage kids?

We didn’t, nor did any parents in our beach house. I have no clue where the alcohol came from.

Not sure that’s any better....

+1

I will never understand this mentality.