How many men blame the singles on/ divorce on feminism?

[Anonymous]

Average men and women do not “charge” average men for their 40 yo rapes because the statute of limitations has run out and civilly they have no ability to prove it. It’s not like the news is going to post it and others can come forward.

The only way a cop in this area can prove a rape is if they child is underage (and then they only get 18 months) or it’s a complete stranger rapes.

Cops have no ability to prove acquaintance rapes, only two have been proven in court in Montgomery county in the past 5 years.

[Anonymous]

Cop,

You don’t understand the definition of objectify. Hint: it has the word object in it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I blame the family law system, which leads women to believe that they will get everything. My ex-wife spent years bullying me, threatening divorce, and telling me if divorce happened she'd get everything--all the time with the children, all my money, retirement, house, etc. She had no incentive to behave well or participate in counseling because all she had to do was drive me from the home and she'd win the lottery.

It didn't work out that way for her, but only because I fought like hell and spent a lot on attorneys. But many other men haven't been so lucky.

I tell all young men to avoid marriage at all costs, and if they are dumb enough to get married, don't have kids. If they're dumb enough to marry and have kids, just have one child and make sure your wife is always working and always have a backup plan and hidden savings ($40,000) so you can hire a good attorney.

Huh? What are you talking about? The default in this area is joint custody, and even if some alimony is awarded, it's not forever. If what you're objecting to is splitting marital assets (including your retirement) I don't know what to tell you. If you didn't like the household arrangement of labor with your wife, you should have dealt with that. Don't put your own inability to manage your relationships on the "family law system."

The default is joint custody unless one of the divorcing parents plays dirty. The default is split of marital assets unless one of the spouses cheats the system. I had $100,000 in marital assets disappear. The court never held her accountable. You are always at the mercy of the judge, and getting access to the judge is expensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Average men and women do not “charge” average men for their 40 yo rapes because the statute of limitations has run out and civilly they have no ability to prove it. It’s not like the news is going to post it and others can come forward.

The only way a cop in this area can prove a rape is if they child is underage (and then they only get 18 months) or it’s a complete stranger rapes.

Cops have no ability to prove acquaintance rapes, only two have been proven in court in Montgomery county in the past 5 years.

In many (most) states there is no statute of limitations for rape.

Arkansas is the best state to rape someone. Six years statute of limitations for first degree, and two years for second and third degree. I think Bill Clinton made this law when he was governor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Average men and women do not “charge” average men for their 40 yo rapes because the statute of limitations has run out and civilly they have no ability to prove it. It’s not like the news is going to post it and others can come forward.

The only way a cop in this area can prove a rape is if they child is underage (and then they only get 18 months) or it’s a complete stranger rapes.

Cops have no ability to prove acquaintance rapes, only two have been proven in court in Montgomery county in the past 5 years.

In many (most) states there is no statute of limitations for rape.

Arkansas is the best state to rape someone. Six years statute of limitations for first degree, and two years for second and third degree. I think Bill Clinton made this law when he was governor.

34 states have state of limitations on rape including Maryland for civil cases.

[Anonymous]

Of course I should add IRL the guy who bought an apartment when single then got married and had to split it in the divorce. He had to start over again from scratch.

The married male friend that couldn't get ahead financially because the wife spent so much money. Divorced now and after 12 years of marriage is starting pretty much from scratch.

The single male friends IRL have spent their 20's working on investments and buying property the number one concern is losing it after marriage. They openly admit this concern.

Yes feminism was great it has given women the ability to have choice which now they have. The cookie cutter lifestyle of marriage and kids that once was doesn't have to be the way it is in the future.

Men and women are choosing to remain single, people are living together and not marrying, people are getting married and having kids. Gay men are using surrogates to have a family and other gay men are living the DINK lifestyle. One female I know lives with her husband in the weekend only they live apart during the week.

People can do whatever they want. I do believe feminism paved the way for all the choices now available. If a man wants to remain single that's his choice who cares.

People are so black and white on these threads. So angry. I know more wives cheating on their husbands than men cheating at the moment. I do think men may change how they view relationships because women have certainly changed. There isn't anything wrong with that. Women act more like men now. It will be interesting to see what future generations do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Of course I should add IRL the guy who bought an apartment when single then got married and had to split it in the divorce. He had to start over again from scratch.

The married male friend that couldn't get ahead financially because the wife spent so much money. Divorced now and after 12 years of marriage is starting pretty much from scratch.

The single male friends IRL have spent their 20's working on investments and buying property the number one concern is losing it after marriage. They openly admit this concern.

Yes feminism was great it has given women the ability to have choice which now they have. The cookie cutter lifestyle of marriage and kids that once was doesn't have to be the way it is in the future.

Men and women are choosing to remain single, people are living together and not marrying, people are getting married and having kids. Gay men are using surrogates to have a family and other gay men are living the DINK lifestyle. One female I know lives with her husband in the weekend only they live apart during the week.

People can do whatever they want. I do believe feminism paved the way for all the choices now available. If a man wants to remain single that's his choice who cares.

People are so black and white on these threads. So angry. I know more wives cheating on their husbands than men cheating at the moment. I do think men may change how they view relationships because women have certainly changed. There isn't anything wrong with that. Women act more like men now. It will be interesting to see what future generations do.

so basically you're against the division of marital property.

you should have gotten a prenup dummy. don't blame feminism.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Of course I should add IRL the guy who bought an apartment when single then got married and had to split it in the divorce. He had to start over again from scratch.

The married male friend that couldn't get ahead financially because the wife spent so much money. Divorced now and after 12 years of marriage is starting pretty much from scratch.

The single male friends IRL have spent their 20's working on investments and buying property the number one concern is losing it after marriage. They openly admit this concern.

Yes feminism was great it has given women the ability to have choice which now they have. The cookie cutter lifestyle of marriage and kids that once was doesn't have to be the way it is in the future.

Men and women are choosing to remain single, people are living together and not marrying, people are getting married and having kids. Gay men are using surrogates to have a family and other gay men are living the DINK lifestyle. One female I know lives with her husband in the weekend only they live apart during the week.

People can do whatever they want. I do believe feminism paved the way for all the choices now available. If a man wants to remain single that's his choice who cares.

People are so black and white on these threads. So angry. I know more wives cheating on their husbands than men cheating at the moment. I do think men may change how they view relationships because women have certainly changed. There isn't anything wrong with that. Women act more like men now. It will be interesting to see what future generations do.

I agree that marital laws are wack! I will encourage my kids to have a prenup. If my daughters or sons have to pay a guy or gal that refuses to work... it's ridiculous.

But the law is, assets you bring into the marriage don't go to a spouse after divorce... so the condo was probably underwater when he married. You friend with assets now, won't split the value of those at the time of the marriage when divorced.

Also, you do know that most over spenders are men, right?

You seem to view things very skewed to men getting screwed over... let just agree it's at best 50/50 but most likely a little bit worse for women since 50% more live in poverty after divorce. 70% of men don't even want custody of their children.

[Anonymous]

This is backlash over feminism but feminists are for EQUAL rights, not trying to be superior. Men blaming feminists for ANYTHING are jist looking to blame someone/somthing/anything for their own shortcomings.

Reality: Men just don't like giving up any of the power they've held for centuries....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it is mostly angry men using the Internet for an outlet, I don't know any guys who actually believe in total control masculinity beyond whatever jokes guys might make while they're having a beer. The "make me a sandwich" type stuff.

My wife and I both work and treat each other as equals. She's not a feminist really, I mean she stands up for herself but she doesn't go reading the Internet looking for stories of men behaving badly. And even if she did, my response would be flat out that unless I'm personally behaving that way or treating her badly, don't argue with or take it out on me.

Dude, based on this description, your wife is a feminist. Sounds like you are too! Weird, huh?
Lots of men single or divorced don’t think feminism is to blame. Especially considering that most of them have moms, sisters, and female friends who want equality. Equality is the basis of feminism.

I'm the PP you quoted. Though this thread has taken a different turn I'll still respond. If equality is the sole basis of feminism (not something I study intently) then I guess she and I are both feminists since we do treat each other as equals, raise the kids together, all of that. I certainly don't look down on women or think of them as less than men.

Perhaps incorrectly, I've generally viewed "feminism" though the lens of my mother, who is in her 70's. She grew up in a poor town, fought her way out and had a very successful professional career in a time where it wasn't nearly as easy for women to do so. I know she fought a lot of glass ceiling type issues, and she had a few marriages that failed for one reason or another. Consequently, she is quick to point out anything and everything that men in power do wrong and you can bet she has a field day with our current administration. With that as my primary comparison, I never thought of my wife as a feminist. She's strong and stands up for herself but isn't nearly as vocal. Put another way, my mother is the far more likely of the two to be wearing a pink hat and carrying a sign outside of the White House.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lol. My STBX might say this. Whenever (before I gave up) I tried to tell him it was unfair that he wasn't sharing in the household work, he would claim I was just obsessed with fairness.

who worked more and provided more income?

Wouldn't matter, both income is theirs.

Home or working out side the home is work fyi.

tell that to the women on the other thread saying their DH should make well over $80k/year

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I blame the family law system, which leads women to believe that they will get everything. My ex-wife spent years bullying me, threatening divorce, and telling me if divorce happened she'd get everything--all the time with the children, all my money, retirement, house, etc. She had no incentive to behave well or participate in counseling because all she had to do was drive me from the home and she'd win the lottery.

It didn't work out that way for her, but only because I fought like hell and spent a lot on attorneys. But many other men haven't been so lucky.

I tell all young men to avoid marriage at all costs, and if they are dumb enough to get married, don't have kids. If they're dumb enough to marry and have kids, just have one child and make sure your wife is always working and always have a backup plan and hidden savings ($40,000) so you can hire a good attorney.

I'm a divorced 55yo male. I understand your position and views, but I think getting married to the RIGHT person for the RIGHT reasons is great. And as much as my teen daughter drives me insane, I would really be missing out on not being a dad.

I will however offer this...

During a conversation in her office about what she would do if ever faced with having to divorce, my female divorce attorney said "I would never be stupid enough to marry someone who made any less than me. And I will teach my son to never marry a woman who earns less than he does, no matter how successful he is."

I found that interesting to say the least!

[Anonymous]

Feminism doesn't seem to be making anyone happier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I meant to write “singledom” for the title. Damn autocorrect.

As an FYI, autocorrect doesn’t take away your option to proofread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Feminism doesn't seem to be making anyone happier.

Nope. I'm glad I can have my own bank account, buy property, vote etc etc etc