My SO bought a house not using my friend's SO as her realtor

[Anonymous]

don't make business personal.

[Anonymous]

I would have avoided using her services, too. Friendship and business often do not mix. It can lead to rifts if the two parties do not see eye to eye on things.

For example, what if the real estate agent tries to employ subtle pressure tactics to buy a certain property? Or questions your fiance's needs in a home? Or your fiance is super picky and wants to see every house in town before buying? You think they would love to see each other at a future BBQ? Nope.

I never rely on friends for business. Your fiance is very smart, OP!

[Anonymous]

I understand you OP. I think you were right not to mix business and friendship.

I sold my house a few months ago and one of our friends (not a close one) is in real estate and was starting his career.
He knew we were going to sell our house and asked if he could list it when we do. We said yes to make him a favor, he's not really working in our city anyway, we didn't care much if he had it. But we simply and nicely asked him not to contact a local real estate professional in our city that works for the same company he does because she doesn't get along with another real estate professional we're using.
He said "sure".

Well, as you can imagine ... money is money. He went behind our back and contacted the girl and ... she took the house in her name to list it as well ! Because it was the same company we couldn't do anything against it and didn't want to fight with this friend.

But the lesson is learned. From now on I will always separate friendship and business. It rarely works.

[Anonymous]

OP here with an update- We have seen Jane one time since closing, at her wedding. John makes excuses for her not being able to hang out with our mutual friend group.

Word got around to the rest of our friends. One couple was ready to buy and after they heard about our experience with Jane they are obviously not planning on using her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your fiancée did nothing wrong. Jane is going to need to grow thicker skin if she wants to make it in real estate.

I would never use a friend, friend of friend, or relative as a realtor. IMO realtor/buyer is a relationship that needs to be strictly business because it has the potential to sour friendships.

+1

Jane needs to grow up.

Also, OP, your fiancee closed on the house. On her own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:House belongs to your fiancée. Stop saying “she/we” bought it.

This.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:House belongs to your fiancée. Stop saying “she/we” bought it.

This.

+1

You seem a little pedantic. We’re married now so it’s marital property, my name is on the deed, and I’m making the equivalent of an extra payment each month towards interest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never want one of my friends going through my financials or knowing them like a realtor would.

A realtor doesn’t go through your financials, and their knowledge is generally limited to what you are paying for the house and maybe what you are borrowing, both of which are matters of public record.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I understand you OP. I think you were right not to mix business and friendship.

I sold my house a few months ago and one of our friends (not a close one) is in real estate and was starting his career.
He knew we were going to sell our house and asked if he could list it when we do. We said yes to make him a favor, he's not really working in our city anyway, we didn't care much if he had it. But we simply and nicely asked him not to contact a local real estate professional in our city that works for the same company he does because she doesn't get along with another real estate professional we're using.
He said "sure".

Well, as you can imagine ... money is money. He went behind our back and contacted the girl and ... she took the house in her name to list it as well ! Because it was the same company we couldn't do anything against it and didn't want to fight with this friend.

But the lesson is learned. From now on I will always separate friendship and business. It rarely works.

The company has a female child working as an agent? Must be a prodigy!

[Anonymous]

Jane is a typical obnoxious real estate agent. Realtors really only focus on selling themselves. There are far, far more realtors than buyers and houses for sale. Realtors are supposed to push on their friends, neighbors, and anyone they can to get a listing or sign a buyer. Its as bad as MLM.

There is actually little selling going on once they get the buyer or the seller signed. It then becomes about closing the deal before they lose the client.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here with an update- We have seen Jane one time since closing, at her wedding. John makes excuses for her not being able to hang out with our mutual friend group.

Word got around to the rest of our friends. One couple was ready to buy and after they heard about our experience with Jane they are obviously not planning on using her.

Thanks for the update, OP! I remember this thread well from the first time around. I’d be really embarrassed about my wife’s behavior if I were John.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jane is a typical obnoxious real estate agent. Realtors really only focus on selling themselves. There are far, far more realtors than buyers and houses for sale. Realtors are supposed to push on their friends, neighbors, and anyone they can to get a listing or sign a buyer. Its as bad as MLM.

There is actually little selling going on once they get the buyer or the seller signed. It then becomes about closing the deal before they lose the client.

People go into Real Estate thinking it’s going to be easy. It’s not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here with an update- We have seen Jane one time since closing, at her wedding. John makes excuses for her not being able to hang out with our mutual friend group.

Word got around to the rest of our friends. One couple was ready to buy and after they heard about our experience with Jane they are obviously not planning on using her.

Thanks for the update, OP! I remember this thread well from the first time around. I’d be really embarrassed about my wife’s behavior if I were John.

Same here! Thanks for the update.

[Anonymous]

You sound like a very conscientious friend (you actually sound female, but maybe you are just an unusually sensitive guy). There’s nothing more you need to do. You and your fiancée did nothing wrong. The realtor needs to grow up and stop thinking of friends as potential clients.

[Anonymous]

Realtors are snakes!!! I was befriended by one at my gym and she was all over me as a friend. She knew I had money so the possibility I would need her one day was what was on her mind. She was right! I decided to sell our million plus condo to move to a million plus house. I did the work searching! She made her commissions on both sell and purchase. Since, I haven’t heard a word from her . Very disappointing to know she was after one thing and it’s hurtful. Anyhoo, NEVER USE A FRIEND as your realtor because you will lose them as a friend. It puts you in a very uncomfortable situation. It’s better to deal with a stranger.