Friend hasn't acknowledged my recent childbirth. Weird?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Despite how DCUM loves to blame OPs for any issue, yes, I do think it would be odd that my close friend didn't reach out.

Plus 1

[Anonymous]

This not a close friend - just a mom she met through her kid.

[Anonymous]

“I guess but when under that kind of stress you're just plain overwhelmed and should be given a measure of grace.”

This line from OP got me. Your friend is under so much stress her hair is falling out and she deserves “some measure of grace” for not reaching out to you directly. I can’t imagine you have many friends at all OP. Really gross take.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My very best friend that I used to see daily didn’t come visit me until the baby was 8 weeks old. We’d had other issues but that was the final straw. I was really struggling postpartum and could have used a friend. I’m not sure why no one visits new moms but I think it’s awful. I was desperate for company.

Because most new mom's ate a major PITA and expect your friends to clean your house, cook, and free babysittong while you shower and nap. Hire a nanny!

[Anonymous]

I asked my son if he informed them. He said he did.

You asked your preschool-aged son to inform your friend? And then you trusted him when he said he did? She probably doesn't even know!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: UPDATE: I asked my husband again, since writing the OP and he filled in more details. He said her husband has been confiding in him about how stressed she's been with work. My DH mentioned she was busy but apparently it's to the point her hair is falling out. She told my DH when he stopped by to meet with her DH how bad she felt that she had not reached out. Could she have reached out and said she's swamped instead of feeling guilty? I guess but when under that kind of stress you're just plain overwhelmed and should be given a measure of grace.

Long story short I wish DH told me this weeks ago. Neither of us have family local so we became friends and relied on each other over the years. That's why I noticed her not saying anything when it would have gone unnoticed for someone else.

I guess some of you blunt posters were right.

Seriously, OP, if your friend is so stressed out that her hair is falling out, she probably needs support too. Perhaps YOU should reach out to her and see how she's doing? You sound so incredibly selfish.

[Anonymous]

This thread is cringeworthy mean. Wow haters take a walk or something.

[Anonymous]

My friend reached out to me 3 months after giving birth to twins bc she only heard from me once. I was dealing with an adoption where the birth family ultimately decided to parent. Take home: people are going through shit (negative stressors) while you are going through the stressors of a newborn (but it's avery positive set of stressors).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had my second baby at the beginning of March. As you know those first few weeks are a whirlwind of adjustment. My husband took control of corresponding with family and friends to announce the delivery. Over the next week I received texts and calls checking in on my welfare. It dawned on me over a week later that I had heard nothing from one of our closest local friends (my older son and their son have monthly playdates and we've spent time together apart from the kids). I asked my son if he informed them. He said he did. My baby is now 8 weeks and I've received not even a text from the wife. It's just just this past week that I've mulled it over and it seems odd. Mg husband saw her about 2 weeks ago and she told him to pass along her regards ("tell her I say hello"). But this is someone who has my number, who've I've had lengthy conversations with and shared numerous meals. I don't know if I should be puzzled or hurt. I can't imagine not checking in on a friend who had a baby in that first week let alone 2 months. Am I overreacting by feeling this way or this normal?

You're confusing an acquaintance with a close friend. You also seem to have a lot of time to focus on it - drop it. It doesn't matter. Maybe she is struggling with secondary infertility or just had a miscarriage. Move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had my second baby at the beginning of March. As you know those first few weeks are a whirlwind of adjustment. My husband took control of corresponding with family and friends to announce the delivery. Over the next week I received texts and calls checking in on my welfare. It dawned on me over a week later that I had heard nothing from one of our closest local friends (my older son and their son have monthly playdates and we've spent time together apart from the kids). I asked my son if he informed them. He said he did. My baby is now 8 weeks and I've received not even a text from the wife. It's just just this past week that I've mulled it over and it seems odd. Mg husband saw her about 2 weeks ago and she told him to pass along her regards ("tell her I say hello"). But this is someone who has my number, who've I've had lengthy conversations with and shared numerous meals. I don't know if I should be puzzled or hurt. I can't imagine not checking in on a friend who had a baby in that first week let alone 2 months. Am I overreacting by feeling this way or this normal?

You're confusing an acquaintance with a close friend. You also seem to have a lot of time to focus on it - drop it. It doesn't matter. Maybe she is struggling with secondary infertility or just had a miscarriage. Move on.

this. there is a woman that fits this description to a T - a mother of my daughter's best friend, who i share quite a bit in common and have seen apart from the kids. i still wouldn't think twice about getting a text from. the only people where i have any kind of expectation is close family.

also "not even a text" - what else did you expect, pray tell.

[Anonymous]

You asked your young (play date age son?) if he informed them??? Wow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe you’ve even noticed. Try not to score keep.

same thought!

OP this is very weird, not only that you noticed it but you took the time (with a newborn at home!) to write up a big post about it on here.

[Anonymous]

You relied on your child that still has play dates to announce the birth of your child to a "close" friend whom sent her regards via your husband. OK. Next.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You asked your young (play date age son?) if he informed them??? Wow.

Really? So Americans aren’t sure how long human pregnancy lasts? Could be 9 months or could be 15 months, right? We have no idea?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The world does not revolve around you and your baby. Get over it.

/end thread