14 year old still wants to be tucked in at night

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I only wish my super-independent 14 year old DD would ask for a tuck-in. She won't let me hug or touch her, and half the time when I walk into her room (and I knock and wait for her to acknowledge me) she literally hisses like a cat at me. She is such a prickly cactus. She was snuggly and affectionate when she was younger, but then adolescence hit and I became persona non grata. When she is nice to me and actually wants to talk to me it is like the heavens open and the angels sing. (Mind you, she is polite to every single other non-parent adult in her life -- they universally rave about how wonderful she is. She saves all the drama and angst for me instead.)

My 11 year old dd is the opposite -- at least for now -- and my oldest, 16 year old ds, is affectionate too (although not snuggly).

Ha ha- this is my DD. Now that she’s in college she’s way more relaxed & happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I only wish my super-independent 14 year old DD would ask for a tuck-in. She won't let me hug or touch her, and half the time when I walk into her room (and I knock and wait for her to acknowledge me) she literally hisses like a cat at me. She is such a prickly cactus. She was snuggly and affectionate when she was younger, but then adolescence hit and I became persona non grata. When she is nice to me and actually wants to talk to me it is like the heavens open and the angels sing. (Mind you, she is polite to every single other non-parent adult in her life -- they universally rave about how wonderful she is. She saves all the drama and angst for me instead.)

My 11 year old dd is the opposite -- at least for now -- and my oldest, 16 year old ds, is affectionate too (although not snuggly).

Middle child. Keep trying. She wants you to.

[Anonymous]

My 10yo stands at the top of the stairs and screams "TUCK" when it's time to go to bed. And it can only be me (not his dad.) Yes, it's sweet but it also can get old some nights! His 14yo brother never did anything of the kind but he makes a point to say goodnight every night at 10pm when he turns out his lights.

[Anonymous]

My dad tucked me in every night I lived at home. One summer I came home home in law school and he resumed his routine- up to my room, wind up the music boxes, toss the koosh balls at me, wind up my bear, turn off the lights and say goodnight. I can’t imagine ever forgetting this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's sweet. I hope you continue this tradition when they move back in with you after college.

You can go to sleep now. Your nightly chore of being a total bitch has been done.

+100

[Anonymous]

My 12 and 13 year olds expect to cuddle, some conversation, and a tuck. They are very independent kids. I’m going to enjoy it for as long as it lasts. They want it because it makes them feel loved and cozy. And since there is no one looking or judging, they can show their kid side at that time every night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's sweet. I hope you continue this tradition when they move back in with you after college.

Bitter much?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For as long as I lived with my parents (23 years) my dad always came into my brothers room and my room at night to ask a few extra questions about our day or mention something funny and the like. We would get a kiss on the forehead and a see you in the morning and it was really nice. We’re both self sufficient adults with families now. Nothing wrong with a little catch up tuck in with your kids!

Us too! I lived with my parents through my grad school time and my dad did the same every night, and he would also bring me a glass of cold water in case I got thirsty. Same for my siblings. It was a routine I loved, a time for a quiet conversation, a really nice time with my dad <3

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS 14 asks for the same breakfast he's had for most of his entire life. I make it happily knowing it won't last forever.

At some point, be sure you teach your son how to make this breakfast; he can even demonstrate mastery by making this breakfast for you! It's great to have this ritual, but at some point, he needs to learn the basics of cooking. You and/or DH teaching him that WILL last forever.

NP. Mine does similar and is very capable of cooking. He often makes dinner for the family. I don’t mind packing his lunch every day or making him breakfast. These cute little rituals won’t last forever. My DS also can’t go to bed without me coming in and saying goodnight. He often asks me to bring him a glass of water just like when he was a toddler. It is sweet. Especially if I’m extra tired and he seriously asks if I want to go to bed and he can bring me a glass of water.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 17 DS still likes when he climbs into bed, I lie down next to him and we go over what is on the schedule for the next day. We have done it for so long now. 16 DS just likes to be kissed and tucked in. Had no idea people didn't do this to older kids.

Is this a joke or what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Only if their bedroom door is still wide open. Never if the door is closed! For obvious reasons. Even I had a nightly "routine" before bed at their age.

Yep. Those darn kids, sometime they need tucking and sometime they need...

[Anonymous]

OP here. I love reading all these posts!! Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My dad tucked me in every night I lived at home. One summer I came home home in law school and he resumed his routine- up to my room, wind up the music boxes, toss the koosh balls at me, wind up my bear, turn off the lights and say goodnight. I can’t imagine ever forgetting this.

I’m 50, when I came to visit my parents last year, my 74 year old father tucked me in. Loved it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's sweet. I hope you continue this tradition when they move back in with you after college.

I’m sorry your kids don’t want to spend time with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only wish my super-independent 14 year old DD would ask for a tuck-in. She won't let me hug or touch her, and half the time when I walk into her room (and I knock and wait for her to acknowledge me) she literally hisses like a cat at me. She is such a prickly cactus. She was snuggly and affectionate when she was younger, but then adolescence hit and I became persona non grata. When she is nice to me and actually wants to talk to me it is like the heavens open and the angels sing. (Mind you, she is polite to every single other non-parent adult in her life -- they universally rave about how wonderful she is. She saves all the drama and angst for me instead.)

My 11 year old dd is the opposite -- at least for now -- and my oldest, 16 year old ds, is affectionate too (although not snuggly).

Ha ha- this is my DD. Now that she’s in college she’s way more relaxed & happy.

I’m a PP who ticks in my 12 year old every night but she won’t let me hug or touch her either — or st least, very rarely. She also doesn’t want to say “I love you too” anymore because she thinks she’s too old for that.