Can an affair ever end well?
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Anonymous
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I think so. I had an affair in my 20s. I was single. He was married with 3 kids. We both travelled for work M-F. We were both stressed out by our jobs. He took it as a wake up call and got a job close to home / no travel. I assume his wife never found out - but I don’t know. He was notorious for dating younger women where we worked, I later found out. He is still married, he seems happy. I see pics on FB because we’re friends but I have never contacted him after he left my company.
I was depressed and lonely - and stupid. I got some good career mentoring out of it and it got me through a tough patch at work. I never wanted to break up his marriage. Now that I’m married I realize how stupid that sounds. Now that I am the age he was then I can’t believe he’d risk so much over a fling. |
Anonymous
| Op update here- I finally confronted my optential AP. Turns out his wife is a lesbian and in love with another woman. They are staying together for the kids. He is in love with me and we kissed. I cant make this stuff up. Now i am really confused and will go seek real advice off dcum. |
Anonymous
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Yes, just don’t sleep with crazy. Always an AP you’d never want to date. It’s crucial to find a fatal flaw. In this town easy, republican conservative, hates the Clintons, secretly loves Trump and declares himself independent.
He is smart enough, cares more about his bruised high school ego and money, but not intellectual enough to debate Nietzsche. He couldn’t even follow the logic. That’s your man. |
Anonymous
Run away. Do not date this man. |
Anonymous
That's a new one. It's a nice update to my wife has cancer. If it's true she should be fine with you dating him, ask to meet her and have her tell you herself. |
Anonymous
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Depends on the understanding you have from the start. If both agree they are not leaving their spouses and it's NSA, for example. Then no expectations. If you actually fall in love, well, then things get complicated. What would ending well be then? Again, depends on what you agree to from the start. Both miserable? Then you end up together? Relatively happy but marriages are lacking and it would be too traumatic to divorce due to kids or for someone older, lose your comfortable lifestyle, your pension and have to move into a small apartment? You can also have a secret affair for years. It happens.
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Anonymous
If you have kids wait till long after the divorce and your kids are emotionally well. As in put your kids first??! |
Anonymous
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My parents marriage was like that
My dad was the party boy, a ladies man My mom knew, put up with it, because what else could she have done. She was never financially independent, very dependent on my dad, still is It was hard on me, but they were both very self absorbed |
Anonymous
| The word is spelled “DISCREET.” Jesus. |
Anonymous
| As in, both run off together and live happily ever after-end well? I don't know about that but I've had many affairs that ll ran their course for different reasons and all but one ended well. I should have headed the red flags of the one bad one-she got caught. The others were a moment in time for both of us with no expectations beyond what we were doing. |
Anonymous
Are you married? Or just hooked up with married women? |
Anonymous
If you had been emotionally checked out, that is the problem you should of addressed with yourself and then your husband. An affair is clear that you have unresolved issues of being alone. Unsure if you have kids, but I hope they find out about you because a wife/mother is the greatest privilege. A marriage can be dissolved but as to the kids, you are just an awful human bein is selfish. I hope you are not another person who believes they are "in love" but rather delusional and need to seek professional help. I hope your husband finds out and tell everybody. |
Anonymous
| Well, a good friend from high school's wife left him dramatically after an affair with a coworker. They had 2 small kids. It was terrible for my friend for a while, he dated around, and just got re-married to a gorgeous, independently wealthy woman woman who will now be his SAHW. So, I think it worked out for him on paper -- although I'm pretty sure that given the choice, he'd prefer that his first wife hadn't cheated. |
Anonymous
LOL Is she in her 20s?? Yeah right I'll bet his wife is a lesbian, as in married men are notorious liars. He is NOT in love with her, doesn't know her from squat. This needs to be tied in with the low IQ people....OP wake up! |
Anonymous
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Yes it can.
Miss you Hannah.... |