The Sex Recession

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Interesting how it says men are afraid to talk to women in public because #metoo and a guy talking to a strange woman in an elevator or at a bookstore would be seen as creepy. That's too bad -- I met many women that way when I was single. Barnes and Noble in Georgetown on a Friday evening was a great place to be!

Yeah, this whole thing is such a load of garbage. If you don't know if you can even talk to women anymore because women are speaking out against sex abuse and harassment, then by default, no, you are not allowed to talk to women, you idiot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting how it says men are afraid to talk to women in public because #metoo and a guy talking to a strange woman in an elevator or at a bookstore would be seen as creepy. That's too bad -- I met many women that way when I was single. Barnes and Noble in Georgetown on a Friday evening was a great place to be!

I question that exaggeration. I have never experienced that in dc and don’t know any of my single friends that have.0

What exaggeration? The article specifically states that women said they'd find it creepy if a guy in an elevator started talking to them.

So you thought it was great to meet women that way, but the women thought you were creepy. SO probably not as great a meet cute as you thought it was.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting how it says men are afraid to talk to women in public because #metoo and a guy talking to a strange woman in an elevator or at a bookstore would be seen as creepy. That's too bad -- I met many women that way when I was single. Barnes and Noble in Georgetown on a Friday evening was a great place to be!

I question that exaggeration. I have never experienced that in dc and don’t know any of my single friends that have.0

What exaggeration? The article specifically states that women said they'd find it creepy if a guy in an elevator started talking to them.

Exactly what you just mentioned. Finding creepiness in being talked to an elevator? Sheesh

Now, that doesn't absolve the creepy talkers out there - they will always exist. But being funny/flirtatious in an elevator is now creepy? GMAFB.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting how it says men are afraid to talk to women in public because #metoo and a guy talking to a strange woman in an elevator or at a bookstore would be seen as creepy. That's too bad -- I met many women that way when I was single. Barnes and Noble in Georgetown on a Friday evening was a great place to be!

I question that exaggeration. I have never experienced that in dc and don’t know any of my single friends that have.0

What exaggeration? The article specifically states that women said they'd find it creepy if a guy in an elevator started talking to them.

Exactly what you just mentioned. Finding creepiness in being talked to an elevator? Sheesh

Now, that doesn't absolve the creepy talkers out there - they will always exist. But being funny/flirtatious in an elevator is now creepy? GMAFB.

Men are so clueless that they don't understand that a woman being trapped in a small space with only one man has her calculating whether or not she thinks he will attack her. 99% of the time, women probably judge no. The other 1% has her on edge, hoping the doors open quickly and beating herself up for getting on the elevator with him.

Men really just don't get it. Women make 1000 decisions a day to protect themselves because we simply aren't safe around you. I saw something online the other day that said, "Ladies, what would you do with yourself if men had a 9pm curfew?" and it BLEW MY MIND. My life would be so different if I and my friends were free to roam about after dark. So. Very. Different.

So, it's impossible to answer that question without knowing what the guy was like, what he was saying, how close he was standing, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting how it says men are afraid to talk to women in public because #metoo and a guy talking to a strange woman in an elevator or at a bookstore would be seen as creepy. That's too bad -- I met many women that way when I was single. Barnes and Noble in Georgetown on a Friday evening was a great place to be!

I question that exaggeration. I have never experienced that in dc and don’t know any of my single friends that have.0

What exaggeration? The article specifically states that women said they'd find it creepy if a guy in an elevator started talking to them.

I don't remember the elevator part of the article, but I do remember the book store one. The woman said something about having a fantasy that she'd be in a book store and a relationship would start with a guy striking up a conversation about her favorite author. Then she reconsidered and said, in real life, it would probably be creepy if a dude approached her like that. It's just flat out the difference between fantasy and reality. The fantasy is that a cute guy takes the hard work off the table by approaching you and making his interest in you clear while, at the same time, showing an interest in your interest and appreciating something about you that reflects your intelligence and personality (i.e. the books you like) rather than something overtly physical. In real life, the guy is likely to not be so appealing and might well just be faking an interest for sex.

The situation is worse now than it was in the past because the default is for people not to approach each other and to be otherwise engaged by looking at their phones. The people who are making cold approaches are the pushiest and, like as not, the creepiest. The decent guys have received the message, loud and clear, DO NOT DISTURB. Which is too bad because women mostly wanted the creepy guys to go away and don't actually mind if a decent guy strikes up a conversation once in awhile. If he picks up cues that she's busy or not interested, no big deal -- might even be a boost to her esteem even though it didn't work out. If she likes him, then great! But, instead, she's more likely to get the dude who should know she'd never be interested and does not go away when she makes clear she's not interested.

So, we get a decline in strangers meeting serendipitously in real life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Men are so clueless that they don't understand that a woman being trapped in a small space with only one man has her calculating whether or not she thinks he will attack her. 99% of the time, women probably judge no. The other 1% has her on edge, hoping the doors open quickly and beating herself up for getting on the elevator with him.

Men really just don't get it. Women make 1000 decisions a day to protect themselves because we simply aren't safe around you. I saw something online the other day that said, "Ladies, what would you do with yourself if men had a 9pm curfew?" and it BLEW MY MIND. My life would be so different if I and my friends were free to roam about after dark. So. Very. Different.

So, it's impossible to answer that question without knowing what the guy was like, what he was saying, how close he was standing, etc.

You are clueless and stupid if you think you "simply aren't safe around you" (with you being men in general).

If you are constantly worried about something that has much less than a 1% chance of happening, seek therapy, you are mental. Such low-probability negative events are not worth worrying or thinking about, period. Stressing out about things that have a less than a 1% chance of happening to you in real life damages your happiness, raises your stress, restricts your actions, limits your freedom, and makes you sound like a paranoid spaz. Relax. Take a deep breath. It will be fine.

[Anonymous]

What exaggeration? The article specifically states that women said they'd find it creepy if a guy in an elevator started talking to them.

"Creepy" is when an unattractive guy talks to a woman anywhere - elevator, coffee shop, gym, bookstore, the street, you name it.

If an attractive guy talked to her in the exact same places, she'd be perfectly happy with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

What exaggeration? The article specifically states that women said they'd find it creepy if a guy in an elevator started talking to them.

"Creepy" is when an unattractive guy talks to a woman anywhere - elevator, coffee shop, gym, bookstore, the street, you name it.

If an attractive guy talked to her in the exact same places, she'd be perfectly happy with it.

Exactamundo

[Anonymous]

I like all the men who think it's because they're not good looking enough when really it's when men are COMPLETELY oblivious to social cues and they butt in and keep pushing. Sorry nobody taught you how to be a human being.

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately, we have lost the ability to communicate and dating is about communicating. Even when using the dating apps, guys are clueless on how to pursue a woman through conversation.

With the loss in verbal communication, we then see that spilling over into physical communication too. People are also more sedentary than they were years ago and physical activity helps with libido.

I encourage people to speak to each other, to say hello, and be cordial. You never know where it might lead you.

[Anonymous]

From the article:

I mentioned to several of the people I interviewed for this piece that I’d met my husband in an elevator, in 2001. (We worked on different floors of the same institution, and over the months that followed struck up many more conversations—in the elevator, in the break room, on the walk to the subway.) I was fascinated by the extent to which this prompted other women to sigh and say that they’d just love to meet someone that way. And yet quite a few of them suggested that if a random guy started talking to them in an elevator, they would be weirded out. “Creeper! Get away from me,” one woman imagined thinking. “Anytime we’re in silence, we look at our phones,” explained her friend, nodding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

What exaggeration? The article specifically states that women said they'd find it creepy if a guy in an elevator started talking to them.

"Creepy" is when an unattractive guy talks to a woman anywhere - elevator, coffee shop, gym, bookstore, the street, you name it.

If an attractive guy talked to her in the exact same places, she'd be perfectly happy with it.

Not sure I accept your premise, but if so, then so what? If you're not attractive, don't approach women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

What exaggeration? The article specifically states that women said they'd find it creepy if a guy in an elevator started talking to them.

"Creepy" is when an unattractive guy talks to a woman anywhere - elevator, coffee shop, gym, bookstore, the street, you name it.

If an attractive guy talked to her in the exact same places, she'd be perfectly happy with it.

Not sure I accept your premise, but if so, then so what? If you're not attractive, don't approach women.

Thus the "sex recession" cited in the article. This doesn't seem like the best overall result for society.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lack of foreplay, no romance and no oral skills.

You chose the wrong man.

No, I meant younger people. They don't know how to date and lack skills. This is my nieces tell me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting how it says men are afraid to talk to women in public because #metoo and a guy talking to a strange woman in an elevator or at a bookstore would be seen as creepy. That's too bad -- I met many women that way when I was single. Barnes and Noble in Georgetown on a Friday evening was a great place to be!

I question that exaggeration. I have never experienced that in dc and don’t know any of my single friends that have.0

What exaggeration? The article specifically states that women said they'd find it creepy if a guy in an elevator started talking to them.

Exactly what you just mentioned. Finding creepiness in being talked to an elevator? Sheesh

Now, that doesn't absolve the creepy talkers out there - they will always exist. But being funny/flirtatious in an elevator is now creepy? GMAFB.

Men are so clueless that they don't understand that a woman being trapped in a small space with only one man has her calculating whether or not she thinks he will attack her. 99% of the time, women probably judge no. The other 1% has her on edge, hoping the doors open quickly and beating herself up for getting on the elevator with him.

Men really just don't get it. Women make 1000 decisions a day to protect themselves because we simply aren't safe around you. I saw something online the other day that said, "Ladies, what would you do with yourself if men had a 9pm curfew?" and it BLEW MY MIND. My life would be so different if I and my friends were free to roam about after dark. So. Very. Different.

So, it's impossible to answer that question without knowing what the guy was like, what he was saying, how close he was standing, etc.

Some women are so quick to say men are socially clueless! But it's not as easy as these women assume to read social cues accurately. THere's another thread where a guy asked what it means when a woman smiles at a man. Many said it meant nothing but some said it meant they liked the guy. How is a guy supposed to be able to discern which women are interested and which women are just being polite? Sometimes women give off conflicting social cues when interacting with them. Maybe you think she's not into you when she's really just nervous. Maybe you think she's into you but she's just a touchy feely person. Instead of recognizing that it can be difficult to read social cues from a stranger, they label the guy a creep!