ugh... ILs here and DH regressing into child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just keep your family routine as normal for cooking and shopping.

You almost have to have the mindset of being a single parent for the next week b/c your DH will be busy waiting hand & foot on his parents and totally making them feel comfortable, etc. and not be much of a help at all with parenting duties.

You know your toddler isn't going to eat brats & sauerkrat for dinner for the next 5 nights so just make something you and the kid will eat. Stop at the store on your way back from work to pick up needed items, etc.
Like I said, just think of it as solo parenting for the next few days.

But I’m the one waiting hand and foot. I’m cooking, doing the extra cleaning and laundry, etc., so they can visit. I’m up long before everyone, making sure the kitchen is clean, bathrooms are stocked, and the coffee and breakfast are ready. I’m also watching DD most of the time, other than when they want to take her to the park. I stepped out to take the garbage out the other night and 3 adults totally lost track of her, even though I said I was stepping outside for 5minutes,

Don't expect them to look after your child. If you need to leave her, say in a clear loud voice in front of everyone, "I'm going out for x minutes. DH, I would like you to watch her the whole time I'm gone."

WTF?

This is why OP is so annoyed. If I had to remind my husband to not lose my baby while I took the trash out, he would be getting the riot act. This is obnoxious behavior. You can’t just decide that you are doing zero parenting because you have guests.

I’m curious what losing track of a toddler inside your home where your toddler lives looks like. Did she unlock the front door and wander into oncoming traffic, or did she go play in the playroom and DH wasn’t quite sure where she went? Did she go get a sharp knife and decide to slice up some peaches because she was starving from only having German food or did she go read a book in her room?

Also, I get complaining if he insisted you go get some stoneware mugs out of storage, but if he got mugs they like on his own, that’s just being a good host. My parents drink lots of soda. They only drink out of individual bottles. I’m not sure what size, maybe 12-16 oz. We don’t drink that. If we do get soda on a rare occasion, we get a 2L and drink it in glasses with ice and a reusable straw. When my parents visit, I don’t tell them to suck it up because when in Rome... I buy the bottles in the size and deal with the tiny inconvenience of having those bottles in my fridge and losing the space to something silly like that. It bugs DH that there’s so much extra waste, but he understands that when we host, we should cater to our guests’ preferences to a certain extent. Like bottles vs. glasses or stoneware vs. glass mugs.

Uh, what? No way would I buy the specific size that they drink out of. Maybe I’m just a bad host.

Why wouldn’t you? If you know your guest’s favorite item, you’re going grocery shopping anyway, you’d choose something they don’t like when it really causes no more than a minor inconvenience to you at most? Are you just being rigid and inflexible or is it spite preventing you from catering to your guests in small ways?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds to me like he is trying to be a gracious host.

+1

[Anonymous]

To me it sounds like your husband is being a good host. I try to make sure my guests get to eat and drink and enjoy what they like while in my home. I host a lot of guests. Maybe you are jealous? Admit it and move on. They are only here for a little while. Do hour parents visit? I'm not watching 4 hours of You tube videos but would never judge my guests fornthr behavior. You also sound super as sensitive. Do you only have one child? I'm also curious of how he lost track of her in 5 minutes. Wondering out of the house vs her finding something to do in her own home is different. I assume your house is baby friendly.

[Anonymous]

I see nothing wrong with eating all German food. What culture are you OP? German people feed there kids various German dishes and just like American, Chinese, Indian or Mexican there are a variety of dishes. I find it hard to believe they are just eating sausage every day. You know German is part of your child's culture too now? I'm sure if you weren't pushing something else your kids would likely be fine with what her grandparents are cooking and serving. Kids often reflect our eating attitudes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see nothing wrong with eating all German food. What culture are you OP? German people feed there kids various German dishes and just like American, Chinese, Indian or Mexican there are a variety of dishes. I find it hard to believe they are just eating sausage every day. You know German is part of your child's culture too now? I'm sure if you weren't pushing something else your kids would likely be fine with what her grandparents are cooking and serving. Kids often reflect our eating attitudes.

I'm not the OP but I have lived in Germany for a few years. And I don't find it hard to believe that they are mostly eating sausages. There are different types (fried, boiled, etc) but they do love their processed meat. Germans aren't really into food the way many other cultures are.

[Anonymous]

Wait what?? DH is on vacation, but you're cooking like you run a catering service - to order? HAHAHAHA))) and none of you are south Asian? that's a first one DCUM....

Stop the sillyness. You don't cook. And have to work late. This is what I am doing right now with MIL in town - have to work super late, also known as shopping trip after work today, drinks with friend tomorrow, mani-pedi the following night.

Your ILs are not there to visit you. Let your DH deal with the obnoxiousness. If you serve as buffer he will keep thinking everything is great.

[Anonymous]

All Germans I know love burgers.....maybe your DH likes to relive his young days in Germany. Are you ILs from the West or the East? Makes a huuge difference. Just download Anntenne Radio App and ZDF and ARD apps on your apple TV...problem solves. Why don't you ask your MIL to whip up a meal or two?

[Anonymous]

Ask Grandma to show your daughter how she makes her wonderful German food. That could be dinner one night. Takeout another - provide a few menus from local places and tell the in laws they are free to order what they would like. Ask your husband to make dinner the third night. And you can make a crockpot (something you can throw together in the morning before work) for the fourth night, and don't bother making it German.