How to ask my 14 yo DD if she's gay
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
| Oh OP, she'll tell you anything you need to know when she's ready. Also, she's 14. Sexuality often changes and maybe she doesn't know yet how to identify herself or maybe she doesn't want to put herself into a box. |
Anonymous
| Op, do not ask. She has barely had any sexual experience and to pressure her to identify, that is not good. If it's on her mind so much that she is choosing to talk about it to you, certainly listen, listen, love and listen. |
arlsinmyheart
Member Offline
Member Offline
| At 14-- I wish my parents asked me!!!! It would have saved me a lot of emotional turmoil. I did the same thing btw. Dropped LGBT history facts--- Hey Mom-- did you know that Hitler might have been gay? Hanging Drew Barrymore posters on every inch of my bedroom walls. Listening to the Indigo Girls. I was also 14. I really just wanted them to ask me--- I was too afraid to say the words aloud. |
Anonymous
Sexuality is more and more becoming a choice. Especially among girls. |
Anonymous
| Make sausages and tacos one night. See which one she picks. |
Anonymous
Or both! |
Anonymous
| Why didn’t you ask her the question you were wondering: “why are you telling me this?” or phrased more gently “why are you so interested in X”? That way she can choose what to tell you rather than feeling the pressure of giving a hard yes/no answer. |
Anonymous
|
My parents didn't ask directly. But, like OP's child, I was, in my later teens, dropping a great number of hints. In one of those conversations, my mother simply asked "is there something you'd like to tell us?"
It was a great relief to me, as a young person, that they helped me find a way to come out directly to them. It felt like a very big hurdle at the time and I was glad they helped me over it. |
Anonymous
| Did she pick the sausage or the tacos? |