I’m dating my (ex) professor

[Anonymous]

I know a very happily married couple (going on 2 decades now) who met when one was the older grad student TA and the other was undergrad, with about a decade gap between them.

[Anonymous]

I see no problem with that. I met my husband in a research institution, and while he was never my professor or mentor, he could very well have been.

[Anonymous]

What's the point of your post op? You sound like a know it all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's ok as long as you are no longer his student. What's the age difference?

No, I’m no longer his student. We never date while I was his student. I’m turning 23 and he’ll be turning 32.

He is regressing.

best comment!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I dated my statistics TA. He's now my husband. Be careful op. Statistians tend to be weird. Lots of my husband's friends have personality disorders.

Op here. And he’s not a statistician. He’s teaching different courses in the psychology department. His focus is clinical.

I am sure we could find him on google with the amount of detail you have divulged.

And your point is?

I am sure he would not appreciate you giving DCUM so much information. Some of us are professors.

DP here, but clearly you didn't take his stats class or you'd know that you don't have enough data to get your answer.

[Anonymous]

While technically not a violation because it's not happening while he's your supervisor or in a position of authority over you, it's a bit icky given the age gap and how recently you have graduated.

You are just as likely to have people think you are getting a boost in your career by dating him (a more senior and presumably connected person in your field) as they are to think that you met/slept with him in college. Also, men tend to date younger women because they are more pliable, relatively speaking, less experienced and more likely to bend to the senior partner's wishes. If you stay together and as you age, you will be impacted by the age dynamic where his career choices become more important than your because he is more senior and is making more money. Your professional contacts and his will overlap and if you separate that will make maintaining professional contacts hard (if people have to choose, they choose the more senior person, because that person is of more benefit to them.)

If you were my daughter, I'd say dating this guy is a risky move.

[Anonymous]

I did this years ago. I had been his student. He did not directly come on to me. He was a visitor and then when I was in his country I asked him to "meet up." We dated for a fairly long time. (I also had a high school teacher who later write me a few mild love letters when I was in college. He was in his 20s and off to grad school when I started college. Looking back, that was more inappropriate. Nothing happened there though.)

[Anonymous]

*wrote

[Anonymous]

It's fine, OP. Go for it! Just be sure you can live with the limited income of a professor if you get serious - unabashedly shallow wife of a professor

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Inappropriate. You should be embarrassed as should he.

Don't listen to this sanctimonious cow.

This should be the name of a Whole Foods dairy line.

[Anonymous]

I'm friends with a (young-ish) professor - he's 35 - and he's dated and slept with students/former students. Stupid but unsurprising. This is common.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm friends with a (young-ish) professor - he's 35 - and he's dated and slept with students/former students. Stupid but unsurprising. This is common.

That's gross. Cant believe he still works in academia!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:While technically not a violation because it's not happening while he's your supervisor or in a position of authority over you, it's a bit icky given the age gap and how recently you have graduated.

You are just as likely to have people think you are getting a boost in your career by dating him (a more senior and presumably connected person in your field) as they are to think that you met/slept with him in college. Also, men tend to date younger women because they are more pliable, relatively speaking, less experienced and more likely to bend to the senior partner's wishes. If you stay together and as you age, you will be impacted by the age dynamic where his career choices become more important than your because he is more senior and is making more money. Your professional contacts and his will overlap and if you separate that will make maintaining professional contacts hard (if people have to choose, they choose the more senior person, because that person is of more benefit to them.)

If you were my daughter, I'd say dating this guy is a risky move.

Oh my goodness, it's just dating. Get a grip, will you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm friends with a (young-ish) professor - he's 35 - and he's dated and slept with students/former students. Stupid but unsurprising. This is common.

That's gross. Cant believe he still works in academia!

Believe it. And know that he is not alone!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I dated my statistics TA. He's now my husband. Be careful op. Statistians tend to be weird. Lots of my husband's friends have personality disorders.

Op here. And he’s not a statistician. He’s teaching different courses in the psychology department. His focus is clinical.

I am sure we could find him on google with the amount of detail you have divulged.

And your point is?

I am sure he would not appreciate you giving DCUM so much information. Some of us are professors.

DP here, but clearly you didn't take his stats class or you'd know that you don't have enough data to get your answer.

Just did a quick check of Georgetown’s Dept of psychology’s faculty webpage. It is not that hard to narrow down the DC university assistant professor in psychology crowd.