How many kids really decline acceptances to Top 10-15 uni's for State U?

[Anonymous]

My D attends Oberlin College of Arts and Sciences for less than the price of most state universities. And I am a divorced parent whose finances are less than half of what it could be, i.e., less than ideal for putting a kid through college. With Oberlin F/A and merit awards, the $70000 (including RB) tuition and fees became more affordable than most of the state universities.

[Anonymous]

This week I am struggling same thing. My daughter did not want to go instate. She is down to deciding between Syracuse and UMASS Amherst. Syracuse is more expensive but she is leaning towards it. Got around same merit aid both schools but Syracuse is more tuition,

She also got into Binghamton, Fordham and UCONN. All offered some merit aid.

Loyola MD offered her most merit aid but it is very small

[Anonymous]

Around 40% of seniors at Blair Science Magnet and Richard Montgomery IB Magnet end up at UMD, generally in the honors programs and very often with merit aid. Many/most of these UMC kids turn down spots in more highly ranked colleges in order to attend UMD. At the risk of triggering the UMD booster I will note that I have not heard of these kids being unhappy with their decision. Most do end up in graduate school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've always thought Big State U would be preferable for DC financial reasons. I mean, really, $70,000 a year? For 4 years? For what exactly? But I went to a Top 10-15 school (yeah it was like $20K then) and I'm having a hard time sticking to my frugal principles now that high school is approaching for DC. And a lot of it, I'm being honest here, has to do with status and how I'll feel saying DC is going to an Ivy or whatever. And how DC will feel. It's a normal human reaction, everyone considers status to some degree throughout their day so don't judge people!!! But does this happen often that kids turn down the > $70K school for the < $30K school? Can I ignore the siren song of the Ivy League? And yes, obviously DC may not get in but let's just say for argument's sake DC is admitted. And because DH and I are alumni, evidently DC will have to apply early to get the alumni bump so we can't just apply to both Top 10 and BSU and see what happens.

If you cannot pay for it, you cannot pay for it.

My DC, a Blair magnet student, has straight As and 1580 SATs. DC will not apply to elite schools, because we cannot pay for any of them. We neither qualify for need-based aid, nor can pay full freight.

There are a lot of such students in the same situation.

It really is that simple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Financially responsible families who fall in the doughnut-hole will do this. Better off going to the Honors College of a strong state U and saving the money for grad school.

Also depends so much on what your child wants to do. My best friend's son went to an Ivy and she really struggled with the decision to spend so much but his goal is to work on Wall St. so the Ivy offered a clear benefit and for that field probably is worth the investmnet. In contrast, my sister turned down U of Penn for a state U -- she wanted to be a nurse and Pen offered no aid. Hospitals don't care where you went to college as long as it's an accredited program so it would have been stupid to go into debt for a nursing degree.

There is no “donut hole” if one is financially responsible. That is kind of the point.

No, the point is that there was no such thing as a "donut hole" decades ago, because the cost of higher education has outpaced the rate of inflation and the cost of living index.

My parents put five kids through private schools in the 70s with no loans or FA. They were not rich - they were just "responsible." No family in their income bracket, however "responsible," could pull that off today.

https://college-education.procon.org/view.resource.php?resourceID=005532

http://www.businessinsider.com/this-chart-shows-how-quickly-college-tuition-has-skyrocketed-since-1980-2015-7

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My D attends Oberlin College of Arts and Sciences for less than the price of most state universities. And I am a divorced parent whose finances are less than half of what it could be, i.e., less than ideal for putting a kid through college. With Oberlin F/A and merit awards, the $70000 (including RB) tuition and fees became more affordable than most of the state universities.

Yes. And you qualify for need-based aid, which is great.

Many of us do not, yet cannot pay full price (and are not willing to borrow against the house or our retirement funds as we approach retirement).

So it doesn't matter how high-performing our kids are - we must limit the college search to in-state publics, or private schools that award merit aid.

[Anonymous]

My DC went to UMD on a full ride then got her PhD from a top tier school so her entire education cost us almost $0. With the money we saved, we opened up a brokerage account for her. She already has about 200k in her account. People take different paths. There's no right or wrong. You do what makes sense to your child and your family.

[Anonymous]

My kid could not get into a top 15 school because his GPA is weak. But he had strong SAT scores.

He ended up getting into schools ranked 50-75, with no merit aid...and he got into schools in the 75-110 range, with lots of merit aid.

For us, it is a no-brainer. My kid will do fine wherever he goes to school. There is no sense paying $25,000 more per year for a school with a slightly higher rank.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This week I am struggling same thing. My daughter did not want to go instate. She is down to deciding between Syracuse and UMASS Amherst. Syracuse is more expensive but she is leaning towards it. Got around same merit aid both schools but Syracuse is more tuition,

She also got into Binghamton, Fordham and UCONN. All offered some merit aid.

Loyola MD offered her most merit aid but it is very small

What are you giving up to fund Syracuse?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Financially responsible families who fall in the doughnut-hole will do this. Better off going to the Honors College of a strong state U and saving the money for grad school.

Also depends so much on what your child wants to do. My best friend's son went to an Ivy and she really struggled with the decision to spend so much but his goal is to work on Wall St. so the Ivy offered a clear benefit and for that field probably is worth the investmnet. In contrast, my sister turned down U of Penn for a state U -- she wanted to be a nurse and Pen offered no aid. Hospitals don't care where you went to college as long as it's an accredited program so it would have been stupid to go into debt for a nursing degree.

There is no “donut hole” if one is financially responsible. That is kind of the point.

So speaks the poster who has no clue what the real world is like.

Pray, tell, what are the donut hole families supposed to do? Sacrifice all their retirement savings just for a fancy college? Or take on a second mortgage? There's a thing called life and it's damn expensive and that's not even figuring in college. Being financially responsible is making sure you have enough retirement savings and paying down your mortgage and providing your family with a safe and decent place to live and ensuring there's food on the table. A fancy college is strictly a privilege, not a right. And guess what, a fancy college does virtually nothing in terms of advancement compared to a good state school for a highly capable student.

I agree that an honors program in a good state school is a great option, but that doesn’t really have anything to do with my statement.

The top 10-15 schools have their own way of figuring financial need. They are more liberal than the FAFSA calculations. There is no donut hole in financially responsible families because they have saved enough without sacrificing their retirement (and they get dinged more than the financially irresponsible because they have saved more). We live in the DC area- well within the beltway. Our HHI has been in the $150-$200k range for the past 10 years,before that it was closer to $100k. ($150-$200k is often referred to as the “donut hole”) We were able to save enough for our two children’s colleges (wherever they would have gone) and for our retirement. We are paying down a mortgage on a house in a safe decent place and ensured that there is/was food on the table. Our children are currently in college now and their costs are around $45k each per year; however, we had budgeted to allow each to go to a more expensive school. While we would have liked for them to go to one of our state’s in state schools for the financial $, they each chose a school that was better for each of them all around.

In the end, it is a choice on the parents to spend their money as they wish when they wish. Own that - don’t blame “the donut hole” for your choices.

Well, we were as "responsible" as you until my husband got cancer. Changed our financial situation substantially. Please explain to me at what point were we not responsible. I would like to know.

Different families make different choices and face different circumstances, don't be so GD smug.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"There is no “donut hole” if one is financially responsible. That is kind of the point."

Actually, THERE IS. For a certain group of families, after you practice the level of "financial responsibility" you are talking about for 20 or so years, and you see your parents zip through their savings in about half the time they expected or you see your neighbor lose their $300k per year job the year before their first of three DC head off to college, all of a sudden, while you know you have the money, spending it is not easy.

Lots of people become more conservative as they get older. I'm not talking about socially conservative or even politically conservative, I'm talking "I've seen too many bad things happen to too many good people, less risk taking, conservative."

I think the more financially responsible you have been, the more likely you are to end up in this version of the "donut hole".

I've heard of parents using large HELOCs, 401K loans to pay for 70K+/year schools for their kids. They are coming up with the money to pay for the schools and they are doing everything that they can to keep their kid's own student loan debt at a minimum....

It's this or choose to go to an in state school which is still not all that cheap and might even still be a stretch for some of these families.

Those parents are making a mistake.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^I wouldn't go that route but others might choose differently. That's all.

Well sure. Some people also buy $500K homes with a $10K down payment and a yearly income of $75K or lease a car for $750 a month or make any number of dumb/dangerous financial choices. That doesn’t mean anything except for, well, people are dumb.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^I wouldn't go that route but others might choose differently. That's all.

Well sure. Some people also buy $500K homes with a $10K down payment and a yearly income of $75K or lease a car for $750 a month or make any number of dumb/dangerous financial choices. That doesn’t mean anything except for, well, people are dumb.

Yep. And there is probably more than a little bit of pride behind it all, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All this thread has focused on is college as a job factory. IME, that is and should have been the role of graduate school. I went public and did fine in terms of career but it was too big, I got lost and did not do what I needed to receive an education. It was not until later in life that I paused long enough to notice that and have regrets. Sure there are people who go public for financial reasons, are suited to navigate a large environment and go on to thrive. Others don't because it doesn't fit. Private colleges are exorbitantly expensive. They also have benefits due to size, faculty and peer group to inform choices. Their reputations also smooth entry into careers and the best graduate schools. We are comparing Fords to BMW's...both can get you where you want to go but with different feels to the experience.

Disagree. Private liberals, yes. But Harvard undergrad with classes of 300+ are no different than UVA or other state schools. Harvard’s focus is their huge grad program. Undergrads are not that important.

Plus an in state UVA that goes to Harvard grad is no different than someone who went to Harvard for under and grad.

lol I bet you've never stepped foot on Harvard's campus. you have no idea what you're talking about. you sound like one of those nutjob college confidential moms

[Anonymous]

My kid is about to decline a seriously good private university (not Ivy, but seriously good) for a state flagship. She said the private was claustrophobic. She is giving up some things for sure, but both choices are solid. If I had my druthers, the choice would go the other way.