Why can't you spell her nickname the way we do.

[Anonymous]

I’d be SO pissed if the monogram was wrong. That just shows complete indifference.

We have a Maddie (Madeleine). My in laws constantly write “Maddy” in texts even though I’ve reminded them like 10 times. It drives me crazy, but the monogram would make me irate b

[Anonymous]

You could keep it and wait for your DD to ask grandma " why can't you spell my name? Are you stupid or something?"

[Anonymous]

Your MIL sounds like a brat. I agree with everyone who said to get a new slipcover or have the embroidery fixed. Why is it so hard for some grandparents to respect their role in their grandchildren's lives? They're not the parents and have no authority over anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You could keep it and wait for your DD to ask grandma " why can't you spell my name? Are you stupid or something?"

If you allow your daughter to speak this way to anyone, you have bigger problems.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't spend money to fix it, unless my kid had already seen it and was in love. Otherwise, I'd ask MIL, "What's your plan for fixing the mistake? Do you want to return the whole chair, or should I store it in the closet until you get a corrected slip cover?" I'd act as if it had to be a mistake.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought you meant like, Vicky vs. Vicki, where it's a spelling difference. I think Susie vs. Suzi is a big enough difference that it's not misspelling, it's a different nickname your DD has from her grandmother. That's less bothersome to me because it won't confuse the kid about spelling and letters, and more of a "you can have this thing together" issue.

What? Are you pronouncing Susie and Suzi differently? That said, so what; people misspelled my nn accidentally but I still learned to spell it. I’m 46 and my mom’s side still misspells it. No biggie.

+1 This is the textbook definition of small stuff OP.

No, it's a passive-aggressive control tactic done deliberately. A person's name is important, including spelling. It may seem small now, but I think OP should stand up their child now, rather than letting MIL influence extend into other areas of parental decisions down the road. My suggestion would be to simply return the incorrectly personalized item and thank MIL for the thought, but you won't accept gifts with the incorrect name.

I agree. It's passive-aggressive. It's rude. And it's going to be confusing for your daughter. Who wants gifts with the wrong name on it??

I don’t agree. It’s not the kid’s name. It’s a nickname. If this is the biggest thing OP has to be annoyed about she should count her blessings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it’s intentional then I agree it’s rude. Get a new slipcover for the chair.

That involves buying a new chair.

No it doesn’t. You can get a separate slipcover

[Anonymous]

I would be pissed. She is being passive aggressive and rude. I would immediately order a new cover with the correct spelling. Clearly she did it on purpose.

[Anonymous]

My grandmother always--and deliberately--misspelled my name (Jean instead of Jeanne). When I was six and got yet another misspelled gift I said "Grandma, I'll teach you how to spell my name!" Her response: "I know how to spell your name. The way your mom spells it is stupid."

Our relationship never recovered. Right up until she died, she addressed everything to Jean.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought you meant like, Vicky vs. Vicki, where it's a spelling difference. I think Susie vs. Suzi is a big enough difference that it's not misspelling, it's a different nickname your DD has from her grandmother. That's less bothersome to me because it won't confuse the kid about spelling and letters, and more of a "you can have this thing together" issue.

What? Are you pronouncing Susie and Suzi differently? That said, so what; people misspelled my nn accidentally but I still learned to spell it. I’m 46 and my mom’s side still misspells it. No biggie.

+1 This is the textbook definition of small stuff OP.

No, it's a passive-aggressive control tactic done deliberately. A person's name is important, including spelling. It may seem small now, but I think OP should stand up their child now, rather than letting MIL influence extend into other areas of parental decisions down the road. My suggestion would be to simply return the incorrectly personalized item and thank MIL for the thought, but you won't accept gifts with the incorrect name.

I agree. It's passive-aggressive. It's rude. And it's going to be confusing for your daughter. Who wants gifts with the wrong name on it??

I don’t agree. It’s not the kid’s name. It’s a nickname. If this is the biggest thing OP has to be annoyed about she should count her blessings.

I see it as much more than that. the grandma had it embroidered. She didn't write the wrong name on a card. It was well thought out. She is playing games. She is letting her daughter in law know that she doesn't like her name and she is going to push for the name she wants. It is passive-aggressive. And it's probably not the first time nor the last time she will be this way. And in my life personally.... I find I am much happier setting boundaries with people like this and telling them what I think. To farther complicate things she brings the child into this issue who is learning to recognize her name. and how does that continue? "oh grandma wishes your name was spelled that way so that is the way she spells it" No big deal right? Your name is Larly but grandma spells it Larli. We let grandma do whatever she wants just to keep the peace. Except then you realize there is no peace with grandma and she is a huge PITA and complicating many things that dont have to be that way. Grandma doesn't respect her daughter-in-law.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it’s intentional then I agree it’s rude. Get a new slipcover for the chair.

That involves buying a new chair.

No, I think OP said it was a pottery barn chair, those have slipcovers.

[Anonymous]

Your choices are to replace the slipcover or pitch the chair.

Honestly, I bet that PB would accept an exchange on the slipcover. They are fabulous about things like that, esp if you explain that it was a gift and the name is spelled incorrectly. You could even just return it for the same slipcover that's not monogrammed if you want to try to de-escalate things with the name.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At least she says it right. My mom refuses to even use the nickname even when the kid preferred it. She puts the full name on everything even though we've asked her not to.

This isn’t the same at all. If you didn’t want the first name to be used, you should have named him/her the nickname.

I agree. Most people would prefer to have the full name over the nickname.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Would you like to switch grandmas? We named our daughter Millicent. The first girl in each generation gets named that, going back many generations.

My mother's name is Millicent and MIL feels that Baby Millicent was named after her. She is bitter the baby was not named after her, so refuses to call her Millicent. Thus, she calls her Tillie. Millicent ignores her because she hears Tillie and probably thinks "well that's not me" and MIL gets very upset. We have told her repeatedly to try calling her by her name, Millicent, but she continues on with Tillie.

Tillie is really cute!

[Anonymous]

I handled this same issue forever! MIL said oh I guess I forgot it wasn’t Suzi and I said “hmm that’s kind of a big thing to forget, especially since we’ve reminded you before! Maybe make a note for your next physical.”

MILs mouth disappeared into her face and she tried to kill me with her eyes but she hasn’t done that again. OR that my kid can’t gave wheat (Celiac) since I used the same line for that (Oh Linda this is really concerning that you’d forget something this big. Should you talk to your GP?)