Why can't you spell her nickname the way we do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought you meant like, Vicky vs. Vicki, where it's a spelling difference. I think Susie vs. Suzi is a big enough difference that it's not misspelling, it's a different nickname your DD has from her grandmother. That's less bothersome to me because it won't confuse the kid about spelling and letters, and more of a "you can have this thing together" issue.

What? Are you pronouncing Susie and Suzi differently? That said, so what; people misspelled my nn accidentally but I still learned to spell it. I’m 46 and my mom’s side still misspells it. No biggie.

+1 This is the textbook definition of small stuff OP.

No, it's a passive-aggressive control tactic done deliberately. A person's name is important, including spelling. It may seem small now, but I think OP should stand up their child now, rather than letting MIL influence extend into other areas of parental decisions down the road. My suggestion would be to simply return the incorrectly personalized item and thank MIL for the thought, but you won't accept gifts with the incorrect name.

[Anonymous]

At least she says it right. My mom refuses to even use the nickname even when the kid preferred it. She puts the full name on everything even though we've asked her not to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you ever called MIL on it? What does she say?

OP here. She pretends that she forgot and then says, " it's just so much prettier... [her way]. When DH told her that DD's name was spelled wrong on the chair, she smiled and said, " oops!"

That chair would already be at Goodwill if someone pulled that crap. FIL and his wife spell my kids' names wrong on everything--well the girls' names anyway--because they can't be bothered and they just assume that they are always right about everything. They're too cheap with gifts for them to personalize more than a t-shirt (but FIL will buy DS expensive tech gifts because he's a boy and therefore should be interested in engineering) but they've done that before.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought you meant like, Vicky vs. Vicki, where it's a spelling difference. I think Susie vs. Suzi is a big enough difference that it's not misspelling, it's a different nickname your DD has from her grandmother. That's less bothersome to me because it won't confuse the kid about spelling and letters, and more of a "you can have this thing together" issue.

What? Are you pronouncing Susie and Suzi differently? That said, so what; people misspelled my nn accidentally but I still learned to spell it. I’m 46 and my mom’s side still misspells it. No biggie.

+1 This is the textbook definition of small stuff OP.

No, it's a passive-aggressive control tactic done deliberately. A person's name is important, including spelling. It may seem small now, but I think OP should stand up their child now, rather than letting MIL influence extend into other areas of parental decisions down the road. My suggestion would be to simply return the incorrectly personalized item and thank MIL for the thought, but you won't accept gifts with the incorrect name.

+1

Or even better, since it's probably not returnable, use a Sharpie or a label to put the correct spelling on the chair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought you meant like, Vicky vs. Vicki, where it's a spelling difference. I think Susie vs. Suzi is a big enough difference that it's not misspelling, it's a different nickname your DD has from her grandmother. That's less bothersome to me because it won't confuse the kid about spelling and letters, and more of a "you can have this thing together" issue.

What? Are you pronouncing Susie and Suzi differently? That said, so what; people misspelled my nn accidentally but I still learned to spell it. I’m 46 and my mom’s side still misspells it. No biggie.

+1 This is the textbook definition of small stuff OP.

No, it's a passive-aggressive control tactic done deliberately. A person's name is important, including spelling. It may seem small now, but I think OP should stand up their child now, rather than letting MIL influence extend into other areas of parental decisions down the road. My suggestion would be to simply return the incorrectly personalized item and thank MIL for the thought, but you won't accept gifts with the incorrect name.

I agree. It's passive-aggressive. It's rude. And it's going to be confusing for your daughter. Who wants gifts with the wrong name on it??

[Anonymous]

One of those Pottery Barn kid's easy chairs? Hell, yeah - I would be pissed.

[Anonymous]

I would either adjust the spelling with paint (if possible), paint the entire chair a solid color or - if that's too much of a hassle, donate it. Your DH has already identified the error and MIL didn't offer to get it fixed or replace it, so you've tried.

At some point in the not-too-distant future, your young DD is going to be sad that her grandma doesn't spell her name/nickname correctly. This will most likely be hurtful to a little one. Address this now, OP, before it gets out of hand. MIL should not be pulling these stunts.

[Anonymous]

It’s a nickname, not her name. I trust you’re one of those people who put oh so much thought into the nickname, hoping she’d be called by her nickname u TIL it was it time for her to be a lawyer, rather than just naming their kid that.

[Anonymous]

Yes, it's annoying but it's not a hill worth dying on. As your kid grows older, she will establish her independence from grandma. She might even be better at it than the grownups are. As they say in the serenity prayer, "accept the things you cannot change" and you cannot change your MIL from being a passive-aggressive controlling woman who doesn't respect boundaries. Sorry you have to deal with this, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would either adjust the spelling with paint (if possible), paint the entire chair a solid color or - if that's too much of a hassle, donate it. Your DH has already identified the error and MIL didn't offer to get it fixed or replace it, so you've tried.

At some point in the not-too-distant future, your young DD is going to be sad that her grandma doesn't spell her name/nickname correctly. This will most likely be hurtful to a little one. Address this now, OP, before it gets out of hand. MIL should not be pulling these stunts.

It is a fabric chair. Yes, the Pottery Barn one.

[Anonymous]

If it’s intentional then I agree it’s rude. Get a new slipcover for the chair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s a nickname, not her name. I trust you’re one of those people who put oh so much thought into the nickname, hoping she’d be called by her nickname u TIL it was it time for her to be a lawyer, rather than just naming their kid that.

I just don't like cutesy spelling or names ending in "i". We never thought about her nickname until she was a week old. Ours is the typical spelling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If it’s intentional then I agree it’s rude. Get a new slipcover for the chair.

That involves buying a new chair.

[Anonymous]

Why does it even matter? So she has a chair with the wrong spelling. Your kid isn't going to be traumatized. This really is a stupid thing to get upset over.

My grandparents have always called me by a nickname that my parents never used. Rather than having a massive hissy fit about terrible inlaws, my parents just said - aww so cute. And now 40 years later, I loved that I had that special name bond with my grandparents - the only people to ever use that nickname.

It is like some of you look for ways to be offended. How tiring.

[Anonymous]

I would politely correct her every single time she used the wrong name. She is banking on you just giving up and letting her use that name. I wouldn't allow myself to fight with her over it but I also wouldn't let it slide.
And that chair would be gone already.