Am I the only one who doesn't feel bored as a stay at home mom?

[Anonymous]

I stayed home for 6 months with DC1. I wasn't bored, but I was lonely a good deal of the time. 3 months of this time was winter, and I felt very cooped up, especially because I had infected stitches that meant I was super uncomfortable for a long time and couldn't do much walking. I didn't know many other SAHPs either.

DC2 was born when DC1 was almost 6. I stayed home for 2 years with DC2. My days were spent ferrying DC1 to and from school, meeting up with other at home parents, taking long walks with DC2 in the stroller, clanging, cooking, etc. DH was working from home during much of this time, so we had lunch together often and if I needed to run out during naptime, I could. In the afternoons when DC2 and I picked up DC1, we could hang out at the school playground if we wanted to. Honestly, it was one of the happiest times of my life, perhaps in part because I knew it would be short lived.

But I was ready to go back to work when the 2 years were up--I felt like I had given DC2 the babyhood that I wanted for him (I did not like working when DC1 was a baby/toddler--life felt like such a rat race). I went back to a job I like very much--it's interesting, challenging in a good way, and fulfilling, and I have terrific colleagues.

I have a master's degree and was age 31 and 37 when my kids were born.

[Anonymous]

I think some people like cooking and cleaning. Also it helps to have other SAHM friends. I could not find any other SAHMs I clicked with --or WOHMs for that matter-- so I went back to work. Too isolating being home.

[Anonymous]

I'm not bored as a stay at home mom. Actually, I could use a few days of boredom. My schedule starts at 5:00 a.m. and ends at midnight most nights. There is never enough hours in the day to do everything that I want to do. I wish I could buy more time.

[Anonymous]

I've done both- I loved staying home -I was able to hang out with a lot of friends and found staying home fun socially. I was never bored. I also loved the lack of stress- no worries on who would watch the kids, what to do on a sick day, snow day, we took tons of day trips and explored all sorts of things. I enjoyed being with my kids and having their friends over. I am now working because I have a high income profession and it's hard to resist the money- it comes with a lot of pressure and stress and staying at home sounds wonderful right now, but alas, college is expensive so off to work I go. Believe me, getting up and going to work each day can be categorized as boring....

Both staying home and working have their pluses and minus'- there is no way to generalize about working or staying at home- each situation/career/income is different and each person has a different idea of what they consider boring. Be supportive of each other- no need to criticize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every once in a while, I read threads like this and I feel like taking my husband up on his offer for me to stay home.

And then I think of all the former stay-at-home moms I know who got divorced, often not due to their own choice, and are now in very tough positions. I also think of those I know who are still married and miserable and trapped. I also know a couple whose husbands lost their jobs and who are now in very bad economic situations. In case it is not obvious, I am from an area with very privileged stay-at-home moms. Seeing what happens to the majority keeps me working.

Same feeling here. Of course people with money don't feel bored. It's like partial retirement after about age 8. You have money to do things you want. The majority of SAHM's who aren't enjoying life are the ones without money.

We don't have a lot of money. At least not by dcum standards. My DH makes about 200,000 a year. Five kids. Two out of college. Two in college college. One high school senior. We are certainly not hurting. But we are far from wealthy. I'm pretty darn happy with my life. You don't need a lot of money to be happy. Just read dcum. Some of the unhappiest women in the country post here. And most have money.

Of course you are happy, you are quite a bit older than most of us and bought a house when they were DIRT cheap. Even if your DH made 1/2 of what he does now, you would be very very comfortable. I suspect not working has really kept you checked out on how life is most people. My impression is SAHM almost exclusively hang out with other SAHMs with kids about the same age. When you work, you interact with a much broader swath and age range.

See. This is part of the problem. You make assumptions without knowing anything at all about my life. First, I'm not that much older. We just turned 50. We move every 3-4 years so we certainly haven't built up magical equity. We have never accepted any family help with money. When we are in DC, we rent way out in Burke. We bought our forever home in a low COL area 5 years ago. We paid $310,000.

Oh, and my best friend is a WOHM attorney. See what happens when you make assumptions?

[Anonymous]

This thread makes me happy. I work mostly from home, so I am not fully stay home -- I don't think I am wired to be. That being said, I really respect and admire women who are fully devoted to kids, hubby, home and it makes me sincerely happy to read women genuinely enjoying it. More power to you OP and previous posters who are happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a TRAP! This thread will be trotted out for the next 5 years every time someone claims that SAH is a sacrifice, the hardest job in the world, and isolating. Shut this thread down.

It is the hardest job, isolating, and almost kills you. Then your kids go to school and you have deserved a much needed break.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a TRAP! This thread will be trotted out for the next 5 years every time someone claims that SAH is a sacrifice, the hardest job in the world, and isolating. Shut this thread down.

It is the hardest job, isolating, and almost kills you. Then your kids go to school and you have deserved a much needed break.

LOL um ok...whatever helps you sleep at night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay op - tell us, how do you fill your days? (plus what is your highest educational degree level, if at all?)

Not OP, but this was my day today:

I’m a SAHM with a SAC

Got DD to the bus at 8:30. Came home, made beds and tidied up, and then went for a run. Got back, showered, sat down to have coffee and breakfast and catch up on some news and check emails, etc.

Turned on a podcast and cleaned the bathrooms. Put away some laundry. After that, I drove to pick up something I bought on a mom2mom site, went to the post office to throw some cards in the mail, then went to Costco.

Came home, put away the things from Costco, and then ate lunch. After lunch, I went outside and cleaned up some yard debris for garbage day tomorrow. I came inside, put on another podcast and prepped a casserole for dinner. I then cleaned the kitchen.

Next, I sat down to watch a 30min episode of a Netflix show, and then left for school pickup at 3:45.

I have a BA and I’m happier at home than I ever was at work. I’m never bored. I find ways to fill my day. Sometimes with mundane tasks, always with exercise, and always with either a book or some other literature, or interesting podcast.

I am beginning to understand why 30 years of this would make someone has unintelligent as my MIL. You are just taking up space.

I know I should’t feed the troll, but I’ll bite.

I don’t feel I’m “just taking up space”, and that’s a pretty cruel thing to say to anyone. My husband doesn’t think I’m “just taking up space”, and neither does my DD. Most importantly, I feel very fulfilled in life. I don’t have to explain myself to you, but your comment is mean spirited and may be hurtful to someone else who may not be as contented or happy as me.

Ladies, you are not just taking up space. You serve an important purpose in your family, even if you are misunderstood by others. If you’re happy, good for you! If you aren’t happy or this wasn’t your choice and you feel trapped, I encourage you to find a niche in something meaningful to you.

Why can’t we all just accept others for what they are?

Clearly, I hit a nerve. The truth often does.

[Anonymous]

So the thread was a question directed to SAHMs. And we ended up with a bunch of angry, bitter WOHMs hurling insults. I have many, many, many happy SAHM and WOHM friends. None of them hurl insults like I see here. As I said earlier, happy people just don't do that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay op - tell us, how do you fill your days? (plus what is your highest educational degree level, if at all?)

Not OP, but this was my day today:

I’m a SAHM with a SAC

Got DD to the bus at 8:30. Came home, made beds and tidied up, and then went for a run. Got back, showered, sat down to have coffee and breakfast and catch up on some news and check emails, etc.

Turned on a podcast and cleaned the bathrooms. Put away some laundry. After that, I drove to pick up something I bought on a mom2mom site, went to the post office to throw some cards in the mail, then went to Costco.

Came home, put away the things from Costco, and then ate lunch. After lunch, I went outside and cleaned up some yard debris for garbage day tomorrow. I came inside, put on another podcast and prepped a casserole for dinner. I then cleaned the kitchen.

Next, I sat down to watch a 30min episode of a Netflix show, and then left for school pickup at 3:45.

I have a BA and I’m happier at home than I ever was at work. I’m never bored. I find ways to fill my day. Sometimes with mundane tasks, always with exercise, and always with either a book or some other literature, or interesting podcast.

I am beginning to understand why 30 years of this would make someone has unintelligent as my MIL. You are just taking up space.

I know I should’t feed the troll, but I’ll bite.

I don’t feel I’m “just taking up space”, and that’s a pretty cruel thing to say to anyone. My husband doesn’t think I’m “just taking up space”, and neither does my DD. Most importantly, I feel very fulfilled in life. I don’t have to explain myself to you, but your comment is mean spirited and may be hurtful to someone else who may not be as contented or happy as me.

Ladies, you are not just taking up space. You serve an important purpose in your family, even if you are misunderstood by others. If you’re happy, good for you! If you aren’t happy or this wasn’t your choice and you feel trapped, I encourage you to find a niche in something meaningful to you.

Why can’t we all just accept others for what they are?

Clearly, I hit a nerve. The truth often does.

You’re just a miserable asshole who is wasting precious oxygen spewing your bullshit.

[Anonymous]

I'd love to be a SAHM, this working outside the home is for the birds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay op - tell us, how do you fill your days? (plus what is your highest educational degree level, if at all?)

Not OP, but this was my day today:

I’m a SAHM with a SAC

Got DD to the bus at 8:30. Came home, made beds and tidied up, and then went for a run. Got back, showered, sat down to have coffee and breakfast and catch up on some news and check emails, etc.

Turned on a podcast and cleaned the bathrooms. Put away some laundry. After that, I drove to pick up something I bought on a mom2mom site, went to the post office to throw some cards in the mail, then went to Costco.

Came home, put away the things from Costco, and then ate lunch. After lunch, I went outside and cleaned up some yard debris for garbage day tomorrow. I came inside, put on another podcast and prepped a casserole for dinner. I then cleaned the kitchen.

Next, I sat down to watch a 30min episode of a Netflix show, and then left for school pickup at 3:45.

I have a BA and I’m happier at home than I ever was at work. I’m never bored. I find ways to fill my day. Sometimes with mundane tasks, always with exercise, and always with either a book or some other literature, or interesting podcast.

I am beginning to understand why 30 years of this would make someone has unintelligent as my MIL. You are just taking up space.

I know I should’t feed the troll, but I’ll bite.

I don’t feel I’m “just taking up space”, and that’s a pretty cruel thing to say to anyone. My husband doesn’t think I’m “just taking up space”, and neither does my DD. Most importantly, I feel very fulfilled in life. I don’t have to explain myself to you, but your comment is mean spirited and may be hurtful to someone else who may not be as contented or happy as me.

Ladies, you are not just taking up space. You serve an important purpose in your family, even if you are misunderstood by others. If you’re happy, good for you! If you aren’t happy or this wasn’t your choice and you feel trapped, I encourage you to find a niche in something meaningful to you.

Why can’t we all just accept others for what they are?

Clearly, I hit a nerve. The truth often does.

Ehh. My kids love that I am home with them, my husband thinks it makes his life more pleasant, we have plenty of money, vacations are easy to schedule and I am confident in my intelligence. I am pretty happy with my life. I worked for 10 years in a high paying job. It was usually boring, occasionally interesting and way too hard on my family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So the thread was a question directed to SAHMs. And we ended up with a bunch of angry, bitter WOHMs hurling insults. I have many, many, many happy SAHM and WOHM friends. None of them hurl insults like I see here. As I said earlier, happy people just don't do that.

This is what always happens. Bitter WOHMs have no self control and cannot help themselves. Sad!

[Anonymous]

I SAH when my husband was working overseas and my youngest was born. I did it for about a year. And then I felt like she needed more socialization than just sitting at home with me all day, so she started daycare. And then I went back to work. She's in preschool now, my oldest in elementary school and I can't imagine being satisfied with being home all day when they are both out of the house. I'm sure there's enough that needs to be done. I just don't want that to be what I do. I do have a work schedule that allows me to be with my kids a lot, so that helps. I guess I may feel differently if I had a job that required me to put in 50-70 hours just to be relevant. What I do makes a difference in people's lives and that brings me a sense of fulfillment that I don't get at home. But I have friends who are SAHM and are very happy with it, which is all that matters.