DS wish to play sports against parents consent

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Some of you are saying we flip flopped, it's not like that. Probably correct to say we caved. We figured since he is insisting on playing only football and since that is the only fall sports for boys starting in August, it is better to engage in a physical activity rather than do nothing in summer and fall.

Anyhow, he will play the first game, and we will go from there. There are couple of home games coming after that, and then the big homecoming game for the varsity team, all that he could participate, and in another 3 weeks he'll be ready to finish up having done most of the season. We spoke about injuries and concerns about CET, and he has come to realize we aren't unreasonable about it, and so he is ready to move on as long as he has a good exit plan.

Cross country, soccer, golf are offered at our HS for boys in the fall.

[Anonymous]

"So here is what I tell my kids about college: if you work hard and get good grades, and do extracurriculars you really enjoy, you will get into the right college for you. If you have to pretend to be something you are not, or that you are interested in something you are not, to get into a college, it is probably the wrong college. You want a college that wants you. The real you. "

THIS, THIS! THIS should be engraved and placed in front of every school in this country! YES!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am pp who said you flip flopped. But, for the future, you can show him this research, which is not really research but a fact.
I think you made the right decision for now, quitting the team now would cause ton of issues at school, with the coach, with his teammates. What is the likelihood of him playing a lot during the game?
https://www.theverge.com/2017/7/25/16025146/chronic-traumatic-encephalopathy-football-cognition-health[url]

I am not sure it will cause too many problems if he decides to move on mid-season for reasons that are related to scheduling / academics. This is not a football school we are talking about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am pp who said you flip flopped. But, for the future, you can show him this research, which is not really research but a fact.
I think you made the right decision for now, quitting the team now would cause ton of issues at school, with the coach, with his teammates. What is the likelihood of him playing a lot during the game?
https://www.theverge.com/2017/7/25/16025146/chronic-traumatic-encephalopathy-football-cognition-health[url]

I am not sure it will cause too many problems if he decides to move on mid-season for reasons that are related to scheduling / academics. This is not a football school we are talking about.

Even kids on teams that don't win state championships care about their team and their performance. So I disagree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only legit argument you have is that football is dangerous. And, even that argument isn't going to hold water in your house because you already let him play some football. He likes it. Nothing you can do about that.

In contrast, my son brought up trying out for punter (and he punts further and with greater accuracy than your standard teen punter). I said no. He asked again. I said no. He moved on.

None of us are investing in youth sport for any real reason to beyond character development, fitness and fun, no matter what storyline we tell ourselves.

+1. You are waaaaay overthinking this. If the answer is no, it's no.

I have four kids. Some of them would have liked to participate in activities that at various times either conflicted with our priorities as parents (DH is completely against football -- flag was ok, no tackle), or would have required a punishing driving schedule, or too much of an up-front investment. We said no, the kid was disappointed, we helped that child find something else, and we moved on. I do not worry that I somehow shut down the next Michael Jordan b/c we couldn't handle travel basketball as a family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Some of you are saying we flip flopped, it's not like that. Probably correct to say we caved. We figured since he is insisting on playing only football and since that is the only fall sports for boys starting in August, it is better to engage in a physical activity rather than do nothing in summer and fall.

Anyhow, he will play the first game, and we will go from there. There are couple of home games coming after that, and then the big homecoming game for the varsity team, all that he could participate, and in another 3 weeks he'll be ready to finish up having done most of the season. We spoke about injuries and concerns about CET, and he has come to realize we aren't unreasonable about it, and so he is ready to move on as long as he has a good exit plan.

Cross country, soccer, golf are offered at our HS for boys in the fall.

The only fall sport for boys? Or did some just not start until September. It defies belief that a high school can afford to field a fb team but has no other sports.

[Anonymous]

I regret to inform you:
it is HIS life, not your's to live for or through him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I regret to inform you:
it is HIS life, not your's to live for or through him.

When he's 18 and no longer needs a parent to sign a permission slip, he can do freeclimbing on mountains, parkour off rooftops, and Ultimate Fighting if he wants. Until then, his parents get to decide, and hope they influence his thinking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only legit argument you have is that football is dangerous. And, even that argument isn't going to hold water in your house because you already let him play some football. He likes it. Nothing you can do about that.

In contrast, my son brought up trying out for punter (and he punts further and with greater accuracy than your standard teen punter). I said no. He asked again. I said no. He moved on.

None of us are investing in youth sport for any real reason to beyond character development, fitness and fun, no matter what storyline we tell ourselves.

+1. You are waaaaay overthinking this. If the answer is no, it's no.

I have four kids. Some of them would have liked to participate in activities that at various times either conflicted with our priorities as parents (DH is completely against football -- flag was ok, no tackle), or would have required a punishing driving schedule, or too much of an up-front investment. We said no, the kid was disappointed, we helped that child find something else, and we moved on. I do not worry that I somehow shut down the next Michael Jordan b/c we couldn't handle travel basketball as a family.

Don't know why you felt compelled to indicate the number of kids you have. It's as irrevelant as your example. If you had initially told your DC 'yes' as OP did, let your kid practice and become part of the team and then changed your mind and said 'no', you might have had something to contribute. But, you didn't. You just said 'no' - which was fine and is what OP should have done in the first place. But, she didn't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How does HS football take all your your time? Unlike rec and travel sports, a major benefit of HS sports is that it doesn't require nearly as much parent involvement. Practices are after school and kids are already there. Presumably games are either at the school or transportation is provided by the school or coordinated by parents to neighboring schools. The investment required by you should be way lower than rec or travel.

Sure it would be nice to show up for games, but even that isn't required. And while HS teams generally hope for parent volunteers to do some things, having managed a HS team I can assure you that there are those who choose not to participate. Their kid is still on the team.

+1 . Football is one of the few sports where the school carries the burden at the high school level. It will take no effort from you except attending the games if you choose to. You may also be asked to help with team tail gating. That's about it. My kid started swimming, then baseball, and now plays football and runs track. Swimming and baseball are much more time consuming for parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Some of you are saying we flip flopped, it's not like that. Probably correct to say we caved. We figured since he is insisting on playing only football and since that is the only fall sports for boys starting in August, it is better to engage in a physical activity rather than do nothing in summer and fall.

Anyhow, he will play the first game, and we will go from there. There are couple of home games coming after that, and then the big homecoming game for the varsity team, all that he could participate, and in another 3 weeks he'll be ready to finish up having done most of the season. We spoke about injuries and concerns about CET, and he has come to realize we aren't unreasonable about it, and so he is ready to move on as long as he has a good exit plan.

Cross country, soccer, golf are offered at our HS for boys in the fall.

+1. I don't think there is a school in America where football is the only boy's fall sport. And I was. Raised in Deep South football county. You are a lot less sympathetic when you make up BS excuses. He begged youcaved and now he needs to finish the season.

And, BTW, if he quits mid season, it is hard to see how a coach-- academic or athletic-- would ever let him on another school team.

[Anonymous]

I call B.S on this entire thread. The supposed parent is either confused or making this up.

There is no such thing as showing up for practice for a sport once school has started. Practice for fall sports started August 14th. As said before in contact sports you cannot participate unless you have attended 20 practices before you play in your first game.

There is no school in Montgomery County where football is the only fall sport.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No way in hell I'd let my son play football. Honestly, the research speaks for itself. Right now all a teen can think about is being a cool football player and enjoying the thrill of playing. The risk of permanent neurological damage and deterioration is too high.

Do you let him play soccer where more emergency room visits are made due to soccer injuries? In the sport where more concussions are suffered than football?

THIS!!!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No way in hell I'd let my son play football. Honestly, the research speaks for itself. Right now all a teen can think about is being a cool football player and enjoying the thrill of playing. The risk of permanent neurological damage and deterioration is too high.

Do you let him play soccer where more emergency room visits are made due to soccer injuries? In the sport where more concussions are suffered than football?

I don't think this is true. Please cite your sources.

Not PP, but:

http://usatodayhss.com/2017/new-study-shows-that-girls-soccer-has-higher-per-capita-rate-of-concussions-than-any-other-sport

http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2017/08/31/concussions-occur-in-soccer-and-other-sports-too-but-yeah-lets-go-after-all-american-football.html

http://www.newsleader.com/story/sports/2015/06/25/concussions-soccer-football-wrestling/29268651/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I call B.S on this entire thread. The supposed parent is either confused or making this up.

There is no such thing as showing up for practice for a sport once school has started. Practice for fall sports started August 14th. As said before in contact sports you cannot participate unless you have attended 20 practices before you play in your first game.

There is no school in Montgomery County where football is the only fall sport.

OP. Where was it stated that practice started after school started? practice started even before Aug14th at his school, and he joined early Aug. I said we let him go do it in summer. As for other fall sports, sure there is Golf, and Cross Country. He is interested in team sports, and that's what I meant.

Anyhow, there were many insightful comments on this thread from those who wish to offer thoughtful response. I have looked at some of the researcch and even more convinced not to let this continue, but only after the season considering how it may affect DS and his team, school, so on.