DH rejects any intimacy

[Anonymous]

I got divorced at 29, remarried at 31, first kid at 33, second at 35. And we are very happy! And have sex! You can do it, OP!

[Anonymous]

Is he masturbating/watching porn? That will affect his desire for intimacy with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to get flamed for this, but I'm going to break with what some of the other posters are saying.

You are 29. If you get divorced, that'll take a year. Say you spend a couple of years dating before you meet a better match, that will take you to about age 32. Then you spend a couple of years dating the right guy before you get engaged. Then you spend a year engaged, now you're 35, at least. Then you spend 6 months getting pregnant, and nine months actually pregnant. Now you're 36/37 when your first child is being born. And that's if everything goes according to plan, and you have no trouble.

If you want kids, I'd think long and hard before ditching a starter marriage to a guy who would make a good father. You can get divorced later.

Nah. If she is normal, relatively attractive and looking, she'll get snapped up fast. Remarried in 2-3 years. Can have a kid shortly thereafter.

That is not what I have seen with my friends at all. Beautiful, talented, fun to be around and single years after divorce with no prospects.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is something very, very wrong here. Don't accept anyone saying otherwise. Either he is gay or he has some major issues he needs to address. Insist on therapy, or leave.

No. You are just a sexist trump supporter. You would not say the same thing if the genders were reversed. Maybe op is not doing enough house work or maybe the op is just horrible at sex( very common with women).

Uh what??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to get flamed for this, but I'm going to break with what some of the other posters are saying.

You are 29. If you get divorced, that'll take a year. Say you spend a couple of years dating before you meet a better match, that will take you to about age 32. Then you spend a couple of years dating the right guy before you get engaged. Then you spend a year engaged, now you're 35, at least. Then you spend 6 months getting pregnant, and nine months actually pregnant. Now you're 36/37 when your first child is being born. And that's if everything goes according to plan, and you have no trouble.

If you want kids, I'd think long and hard before ditching a starter marriage to a guy who would make a good father. You can get divorced later.

Nah. If she is normal, relatively attractive and looking, she'll get snapped up fast. Remarried in 2-3 years. Can have a kid shortly thereafter.

That is not what I have seen with my friends at all. Beautiful, talented, fun to be around and single years after divorce with no prospects.

I've noticed this also. And the ones who have remarried have made some sort of obvious concession (e.g. a guy who is 10+ years older, which I'm sure will be fun on the back end, or a guy who is absolutely nowhere near their level professionally, in a way that bothers them). There's also a fair amount of stress in the dating process. Mid 30s guys are often slower to commit. More than one male friend has expressed frustration to me about women in this age bracket, because so many of them are VERY marriage minded in a way that is hard to hide.

[Anonymous]

Get out... Why stay? No kids? Bye Felicia

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about the vows "for better or worse" this is worse. Deal with it.

What about the vows "to have and to hold?" You know they say "have" because they can't say "fuk twice a week" in church.

[Anonymous]

Was he always like this?

[Anonymous]

It's like clockwork.

DW doesn't want sex? It's DH's fault.

DH doesn't want sex? It's DH's fault.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to get flamed for this, but I'm going to break with what some of the other posters are saying.

You are 29. If you get divorced, that'll take a year. Say you spend a couple of years dating before you meet a better match, that will take you to about age 32. Then you spend a couple of years dating the right guy before you get engaged. Then you spend a year engaged, now you're 35, at least. Then you spend 6 months getting pregnant, and nine months actually pregnant. Now you're 36/37 when your first child is being born. And that's if everything goes according to plan, and you have no trouble.

If you want kids, I'd think long and hard before ditching a starter marriage to a guy who would make a good father. You can get divorced later.

If she has kids with him, it may be at least 20 years before she can divorce. That, or give up being with her kids for half the time, shuttling them back and forth from home to home. In this last scenario, OP as a single mom would have a much harder time dating and finding a new partner.

I would make the break now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm going to get flamed for this, but I'm going to break with what some of the other posters are saying.

You are 29. If you get divorced, that'll take a year. Say you spend a couple of years dating before you meet a better match, that will take you to about age 32. Then you spend a couple of years dating the right guy before you get engaged. Then you spend a year engaged, now you're 35, at least. Then you spend 6 months getting pregnant, and nine months actually pregnant. Now you're 36/37 when your first child is being born. And that's if everything goes according to plan, and you have no trouble.

If you want kids, I'd think long and hard before ditching a starter marriage to a guy who would make a good father. You can get divorced later.

If she has kids with him, it may be at least 20 years before she can divorce. That, or give up being with her kids for half the time, shuttling them back and forth from home to home. In this last scenario, OP as a single mom would have a much harder time dating and finding a new partner.

I would make the break now.

Actually, 50/50 custody leaves you tons of time to date and find a not gay husband.

[Anonymous]

I am sorry you are going through this-I do hope you and hubby can find a way- there was a reason you got married in the first place- after 30= years I still pray a lot. Many Blessings

[Anonymous]

OP, I recommend having kids immediately. If you are anything like the other women on this site (or my wife), you will immediately stop wanting sex with your husband. Then you two will be on same page for sex drive! Everyone wins!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I recommend having kids immediately. If you are anything like the other women on this site (or my wife), you will immediately stop wanting sex with your husband. Then you two will be on same page for sex drive! Everyone wins!

LOL, I thought the same thing.

Thing is, when I had an affair and stopped pursuing my low drive DW, she got upset. Not that she missed the sex, but she missed feeling desired. Women want their men to make them feel attractive, even if they don't want the sex.

Note to self for next affair, always keep telling your wife how sexy she is and how you can't wait to ravage her on the next vacation, in 2018.