DS is being bullied for doing ballet

[Anonymous]

It's cool that your son loves ballet- I would have been thrilled if my son chose such a challenging activity.

Yes, agree on limiting contact- but you also need to talk with your son. Let him know he's great and not to let people's small mindedness bring him down.

[Anonymous]

OP, this may be unpopular on this board but can you take him out of dance if it's affecting his self-esteem? He can always re-enroll when he's older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks so much for all these suggestions and comments. It's both grandparents and brother and sister-in-law on DH's side. We were living in Seattle a year and a half ago when we moved to the area for work, which seemed great at the time to be near his family and DS can finally have a cousin close in age to play with.

I did not realize how sexist and homophobic DH's family was until this move and their interactions with my son.. they're politically liberal.. Big difference I've learned.

I think the underlying worry is that DS is gay or as they have accused me of trying to "make him gay." Both DH and I have spoke to them about this but I have a feeling we're just looked at as the strange west-coasters. Obviously DH and I would not mind one bit if our son discovered he was gay. Regardless, gay or not, I'm not comfortable with DS being exposed to them and their bigotry, but he loves playing with his cousin and he loves his grandparents.

I think less interaction is the key here, although I'll admit I was hoping someone would have a magical solution for me, but ultimately I think they are who they are. All the arguments above I've made.

Thank you all.

Let's take ballet issue out of this because it's muddying the water. Your family members are teasing and insulting a seven year old, for Christ's sake. What makes you think this will ever stop? Ok, so he quits ballet, but then in middle school he prefers to play the flute instead of being on the football team. I bet he'll be called gay for that, too. You can love someone who is a bad influence, but love doesn't make their toxic behaviors acceptable, and it DOES NOT OBLIGATE YOU TO SPEND TIME WITH THEM.

Also ask yourself how you would feel if your son started teasing a child at school in the same way. What if a girl had short hair and dressed like a boy, and he called her names and teased her for being boyish? You cannot let your son think that this is acceptable behavior.

[Anonymous]

Let's take ballet issue out of this because it's muddying the water. Your family members are teasing and insulting a seven year old, for Christ's sake. What makes you think this will ever stop? Ok, so he quits ballet, but then in middle school he prefers to play the flute instead of being on the football team. I bet he'll be called gay for that, too. You can love someone who is a bad influence, but love doesn't make their toxic behaviors acceptable, and it DOES NOT OBLIGATE YOU TO SPEND TIME WITH THEM.

Also ask yourself how you would feel if your son started teasing a child at school in the same way. What if a girl had short hair and dressed like a boy, and he called her names and teased her for being boyish? You cannot let your son think that this is acceptable behavior.

+++1000.