Is Throwing or breaking objects during an argument = domestic violence?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a part of a pattern of abuse my ex-wife threw my laptop computer against the wall and broke it. When the police came they refused to even file a report because "they didn't see it happen". The judge didn't care about a series of these incidents.

That's because it was a "she" doing the violence.

I was told repeatedly not to do anything unless she did real damage. This was Virginia cops, Commonwealth's attorney (a woman), 2 Va judges and gobs of lawyers. While Virginia is is supposed to be a first to call state, it never works well for a man.

[Anonymous]

Yes.

My ex-husband ripped a door off its hinges, broke it in two, and threw the pieces in my direction.

Neither half made contact with me. I was completely terrorized.

Please don't normalize this behavior. It is not normal, and it is mist definitely not OK.

[Anonymous]

Mist = most

[Anonymous]

Yes, it is domestic violence. I was in an abusive marriage and had to get an order of protection to move out safely (in Virginia). Some of the incidents in my request for the order of protection were when my ex destroyed things (I included photos. I had started quietly documenting the incidents when things started to escalate and I knew I needed to get out).

OP, if your husband does this now, it will eventually escalate. Get out now, before it does. Just the fact that he's trying to claim it's not DV, instead of being truly repentant and getting help/counseling, is a bad sign.

[Anonymous]

I hope you are not asking because your husband took his anger over stress from working on his Ph.D. on you. I don't care how much he thinks you criticize or nag him. That does not make it acceptable to go into an enraged state. and it is domestic violemce. Please disregard if I am mixing you up with another poster who recently started a few threads asking for help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are the objects being thrown near someone but not at them? If not, no, I don't think it's domestic violence. It's certainly close and it's not good, but I don't think it rises to the level of domestic violence.

Well turns out I'm wrong. Googled it and was brought to a Clark county in Indiana prosecutors page. Throwing things or destroying property is a form of intimidation and qualifies as DV. http://www.clarkprosecutor.org/html/domviol/what.htm

Yes. Once I clued in to what I was doing, I went to the doctor and got some help. Woman here. I used to throw things a long time ago. Not towards anyone but I still did it.

[Anonymous]

I didn't realize I was a victim this whole time. My wife threw my TV out of the door, threw pillows at me and one time dropped my computer monitor on the floor breaking it among other things in the past.

I'm going to call her out for DV next time!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't realize I was a victim this whole time. My wife threw my TV out of the door, threw pillows at me and one time dropped my computer monitor on the floor breaking it among other things in the past.

I'm going to call her out for DV next time!

Don't call her out. Leave with the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes.

My ex-husband ripped a door off its hinges, broke it in two, and threw the pieces in my direction.

Neither half made contact with me. I was completely terrorized.

Please don't normalize this behavior. It is not normal, and it is mist definitely not OK.

WTF were you married to the Incredible Hulk?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes.

My ex-husband ripped a door off its hinges, broke it in two, and threw the pieces in my direction.

Neither half made contact with me. I was completely terrorized.

Please don't normalize this behavior. It is not normal, and it is mist definitely not OK.

WTF were you married to the Incredible Hulk?

No he was the Incredible Jerk.

[Anonymous]

Borderline in my opinion.

Especially if the other person breaks something of yours.
And you can never know for sure if the item thrown can injure yourself, your children or your pets.

In my experience, partners that threw & broke items in fits of anger/rage eventually ended up getting just as physical w/me as the relationship progressed.

*Note:
It is NEVER a good thing when someone cannot control their anger in a constructive manner!

[Anonymous]

So if a woman throws or breaks something during a disagreement, the man could and should call the police to report a domestic violence claim? That is what I am understanding from reading the replies in this thread.

[Anonymous]

I think if anyone is throwing things during an argument and it makes you feel like you are in danger, call the police.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think if anyone is throwing things during an argument and it makes you feel like you are in danger, call the police.

That means that three of my past girlfriends would now have police records and have appeared in the police log of my local paper.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think if anyone is throwing things during an argument and it makes you feel like you are in danger, call the police.

That means that three of my past girlfriends would now have police records and have appeared in the police log of my local paper.

Were you afraid of them? Did their throwing things make you change your behavior to try to keep them from throwing things again? Was throwing things coupled with other threats. Use your brain man, and don't be so f-ing obtuse.