How did you handle the disappointment of admission rejections in the past?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So far my kids have never been rejected from anywhere we applied to. Having said that we only ever applied to a couple of places we were certain were a good fit and were very committed to. I don't know if that makes a difference but I do think if you're using the scatter gun effect, i.e. applying to a lot of schools, you do increase your chances of getting a "no" simply because they know that.

When our student applied more than seventeen years ago, and was rejected by all of the Big 3 (Beauvoir, GDS, Sidwell), we only applied to four schools total. In those days everything was done by paper application, and I do not recall being asked to which, if any other schools, our child had applied.

While I agree that no one should apply to seven of more schools, I do think that it is realistic -- and not scattershot -- to apply to at least four schools particularly if, like us, you had no connection to any private school. If our child had not applied to that fourth school for kindergarten, he or she would probably still have been rejected by all of the Big 3, and additionally, they would have missed out on the wonderful school that so positively impacted their life.

[Anonymous]

Teach them to take it as a learning experience. There will be times in life when they don't get what they so want. Learning how to pick themselves up from that is important too, as is your reaction to their shortcomings. This too will pass, but your relationship with your kid is forever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teach them to take it as a learning experience. There will be times in life when they don't get what they so want. Learning how to pick themselves up from that is important too, as is your reaction to their shortcomings. This too will pass, but your relationship with your kid is forever.

I agree with your good advice, though I am not sure that I would characterize, or equate, getting turned down by a private school as the child's shortcoming.

[Anonymous]

I didn't handle it well at all. I was pissed off. I felt misled and I was angry. My child was wait listed, but really didn't have a shot that year for lots of reasons...mainly there were no hooks for him. We applied to only one school that was the one we wanted. We applied again for the next year. Our child was accepted and is thriving and made both honor roll and effort roll for two quarters. Our child has made nice friends and the teacher said awesome things about leadership and maturity. Having gotten to know the students at the school, I believe the wait listing was due to numbers.

So, my advice is to be honest about your intentions for attending. Don't take a rejection personally. It wastes a lot of energy. In our case it wasn't the right year. We persevered and it was and it ended up a good thing. I also recommend to meet with the admissions office to have an really honest conversation about next steps and be prepared to hear that there aren't any. Also, be prepared to take the advice of the AD and bite your tongue if necessary. I said some unkind, albeit honest, things about the feedback we had received.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't handle it well at all. I was pissed off. I felt misled and I was angry. My child was wait listed, but really didn't have a shot that year for lots of reasons...mainly there were no hooks for him. We applied to only one school that was the one we wanted. We applied again for the next year. Our child was accepted and is thriving and made both honor roll and effort roll for two quarters. Our child has made nice friends and the teacher said awesome things about leadership and maturity. Having gotten to know the students at the school, I believe the wait listing was due to numbers.

So, my advice is to be honest about your intentions for attending. Don't take a rejection personally. It wastes a lot of energy. In our case it wasn't the right year. We persevered and it was and it ended up a good thing. I also recommend to meet with the admissions office to have an really honest conversation about next steps and be prepared to hear that there aren't any. Also, be prepared to take the advice of the AD and bite your tongue if necessary. I said some unkind, albeit honest, things about the feedback we had received.

It's interesting to know that you found it worthwhile to follow up. Among the schools to which we are applying, there's one in particular that I think my child would love. If DC doesn't get in, which is an entirely likely outcome, maybe we'll be so bold as to ask about whether they welcome reapplication. I suppose the question is particularly appropriate with a WL decision...

[Anonymous]

PP, right! What do you have to lose? And yes might learn something. We did. Made adjustments and reapplied. I still have some resentment, but in the end, our child is in the best school for their needs and interests.

[Anonymous]

PP, right! What do you have to lose? And yes might learn something. We did. Made adjustments and reapplied. I still have some resentment, but in the end, our child is in the best school for their needs and interests.

[Anonymous]

PP, which grade did you apply first time? And I assume DC was at a school where it continued so you could stay and reapply the following year? It is nice to hear you were able to have an honest convo with the AD and it was not held against you for re-application?

[Anonymous]

PP. grade 4 and yes DC could stay but current school was our goal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ice cream for the kid, and a couple drinks for the still proud parents.

The next day, start making voodoo dolls of everyone who dissed you.

I love you. -- from the parent of 3 Sidwell grads who knows (now) that it's not nirvana.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In the interests of setting proper expectations, anyone have anecdotal evidence of schools where sibling applications for PK or K might be higher (or lower) than usual this year?

Sibling applications for PreK at Beauvoir seem high - though it's possible that the case every year since Beauvoir only grants sibling preference for PreK. K

That why I said "than usual," recognizing that sibling applications are perpetually high at some schools. That said, if Beauvoir is in fact higher than usual this year, any sense as to whether it's for boys, girls, or both?

[Anonymous]

we didn't get into Maret for our kids for 2nd and K. Stuck it out in DCPS and now they are both at top Big 3 for middle school. So happy with all the money we saved and the kids are more well-rounded and appreciate private school SO MUCH MORE now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I read the same thread every year on DCUM, and I always offer the same story and advice.

My child was rejected from Beauvoir (NCS/STA), Georgetown Day School (GDS), and Sidwell -- from all three(!) -- when we applied for them in kindergarten. They enrolled in the only school to admit them, one further down the list, and it was the perfect school for them.

Fast forward nine years and that same child was accepted to all of those schools for upper school. Of course, by eighth grade they had the benefit of years of excellent grades, strong ERB testing, and a 99th %ile standardized test score. They currently attend Harvard.

Do not worry, as things have a way of working out. In our child's case, the non-Big 3 school they attended from kinder-8th was the perfect school for them.

So clearly the kid was not a legacy at Harvard. "They" is plural. He or she attends. Furthermore, if you are so proud of the K-8 school, why not post it? And which Big 3 did he/she (sorry "they") attend?

Drive-by correction: "They" can be used in the singular, when one wishes to write to remain gender-neutral.

No, it can't. S/he or He or she is the correct gender-neutral term.

[Anonymous]

"It" might be an even more PC gender neutral term. Just use "it", s/he is so heteronormative.

[Anonymous]

^dear parents hung up on criticizing use of the word "they", please selfsegregate yourselves into one school somewhere, and let us all know where so that the rest of us can avoid it.