How did you handle the disappointment of admission rejections in the past?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I think there of been some very nice and thoughtful responses already, so I just wanted to chime in to add one thing - remember that you may be rejected/wait listed even if the admissions team absolutely loves your child. While it's hard to take any perceived criticism or rejection of your child, keep in mind that the admissions team has a lot of factors unrelated to awesomeness to balance. There are going to be kids with preference because of siblings or parents who work at the school, and there also needs to be a balance of ages, sexes, races and personalities in a class.

One of my children is in a class where there isn't one single kid of his/her sex that wasn't a priority applicant. Some years just stink like that.

To piggy back on this, that is absolutely true. My DC was WL at a particular school we thought we had more than a good chance of getting into. We met another family whose child was also WL who arguably should have also had a good chance of getting in. Fast forward a couple of months and by chance chance I run into the Admissions Director of the school dear child was WL at. AD asked about DC and whether things were going well at the school DC was attending. After a few minutes of chatting, AD said "I was disappointed we were not able to offer DC a spot. We had an unusually high number of sibling applications, which we try to honor, and it resulted in a number of great applicants being placed on our WL." Maybe the AD was being gracious, but I appreciated the explanation.

[Anonymous]

In the interests of setting proper expectations, anyone have anecdotal evidence of schools where sibling applications for PK or K might be higher (or lower) than usual this year?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In the interests of setting proper expectations, anyone have anecdotal evidence of schools where sibling applications for PK or K might be higher (or lower) than usual this year?

These are good years to apply for entry-level kinder or pre-kinder at any of the Big 3 or other private schools in the Washington, DC area. The simple reason is that the Boomers (obviously, even for the ones on their third trophy wife), as well as GenXers have mostly already aged up and out of having children of pre-kinder and kindergarten ages. And the Millennials have, for the most part, not yet started families, or do not yet have children of pre-kinder and kindergarten ages; and certainly not with older siblings. You are in a temporary lull or trough, so to speak, and so a highly-qualified student, with parents who appear willing and able to pay 12+ years of private school tuition, will seem very attractive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In the interests of setting proper expectations, anyone have anecdotal evidence of schools where sibling applications for PK or K might be higher (or lower) than usual this year?

Sibling applications for PreK at Beauvoir seem high - though it's possible that the case every year since Beauvoir only grants sibling preference for PreK. K

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I read the same thread every year on DCUM, and I always offer the same story and advice.

My child was rejected from Beauvoir (NCS/STA), Georgetown Day School (GDS), and Sidwell -- from all three(!) -- when we applied for them in kindergarten. They enrolled in the only school to admit them, one further down the list, and it was the perfect school for them.

Fast forward nine years and that same child was accepted to all of those schools for upper school. Of course, by eighth grade they had the benefit of years of excellent grades, strong ERB testing, and a 99th %ile standardized test score. They currently attend Harvard.

Do not worry, as things have a way of working out. In our child's case, the non-Big 3 school they attended from kinder-8th was the perfect school for them.

So clearly the kid was not a legacy at Harvard. "They" is plural. He or she attends. Furthermore, if you are so proud of the K-8 school, why not post it? And which Big 3 did he/she (sorry "they") attend?

What is your problem? Obviously PP used "they" to avoid saying "he" or "she" and outing her child. Hope that's OK with you. Although "s/he" would have worked too. Also, "they" has a long history of being used as a singular pronoun, from Chaucer to Jane Austen, and there's actually more openness to it once you leave SAT-world.

+1 Well said, PP.

[Anonymous]

OP - I get it, 7th grad is a tough time to feel rejected. Our strategy was to be sure that we talked up what was most likely a safety school and, if you can, talk up your public if that's your safety. We applied to two that we thought would be likely acceptances in addition to the downtown popular schools. DC got shut out of the popular schools, but got into both back ups which was nice b/c DC still felt like there was a choice to be made. Truth be told, DC (and we) in many ways began to really like one of the safeties more than the schools we were supposed to like more before decisions came out. And like one of the above posters, after graduation DC ended up a top college and is doing great there. There are many independents that can prepare a child very, very well in this area for the rest of his/her life in many ways. Just try not to take 7th grade so seriously. .

[Anonymous]

Ice cream for the kid, and a couple drinks for the still proud parents.

The next day, start making voodoo dolls of everyone who dissed you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ice cream for the kid, and a couple drinks for the still proud parents.

The next day, start making voodoo dolls of everyone who dissed you.

Don't forget. Pot is now legal in DC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ice cream for the kid, and a couple drinks for the still proud parents.

The next day, start making voodoo dolls of everyone who dissed you.

While I'd like to be mature like some PPs, I really think the voodoo dolls/ ice cream approach would work best for us. Not OP but another parent applying for the fall.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ice cream for the kid, and a couple drinks for the still proud parents.

The next day, start making voodoo dolls of everyone who dissed you.

While I'd like to be mature like some PPs, I really think the voodoo dolls/ ice cream approach would work best for us. Not OP but another parent applying for the fall.

There is some charm to the classic approach of shouting, "Yeah, well you'all are just a bunch of idiots anyway!"

[Anonymous]

When my DS was rejected, I bought a cat. May sound silly, but we didn't have a pet at that point, and it was nice to have a loving furry face.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, know that "there is more than one way to skin a cat". Mine was rejected at Sidwell after being on the waitlist and the head of the middle school really getting our hope up at the time.

Mine ended up at Montessori for awhile and then re-applied in 7th and got into another top private.

Ended up at Princeton thanks to her Montessori connections!

OH, and of course an Ivy school is the only goal of a good education?

-- Tiger who loved Princeton, but thinks all this focus on Ivy-branded schools is unhealthy for kids

[Anonymous]

Then imagine how unhealthy this obsession with a Big 3 School is for kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Then imagine how unhealthy this obsession with a Big 3 School is for kids.

At preK and kinder no less! I am the previous poster whose child was rejected by all of the Big 3 for kindergarten. In a way that freed us as parents and s/he from parental pressure and expectations for the "payoff" of a top college, and let them enjoy learning, socializing, and growing outside the Big 3 without the anxiety of feeling like they had to live up to some early "distinction" or "prize" of potential.

Yes, I know that most students at a Big 3 never feel the pressure to attain an Ivy League, or the anxiety of parent-driven competition with their classmates. The way you parent, as a previous poster said, is what ultimately makes the difference.

[Anonymous]

So far my kids have never been rejected from anywhere we applied to. Having said that we only ever applied to a couple of places we were certain were a good fit and were very committed to. I don't know if that makes a difference but I do think if you're using the scatter gun effect, i.e. applying to a lot of schools, you do increase your chances of getting a "no" simply because they know that.