My daughter thinks she's good at a sport but she's not

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If she loves the sport but is bad... Have you ever had her go to clinics or workshops? If not, why not?

If she hasn't developed by 12th grade she will will suck just as bad even if she had attended 124 clinics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If she loves the sport but is bad... Have you ever had her go to clinics or workshops? If not, why not?

If she hasn't developed by 12th grade she will will suck just as bad even if she had attended 124 clinics.

Not the PP, but I suspect this is a rhetorical question - getting mom to understand that she partly owns the daughter's suckishness if she hasn't supported her development along the way, by sending her to clinics. Agree by 12th grade, it is too late.

[Anonymous]

I think there may be an easy solution to this -- have her contact the coach at the school she's thinking of and send game video and contact info for her coach. Have her ask if she could play for the team and if she would be likely to get minutes. I expect that the coach will give a truer answer than the admissions people.

D3 schools vary wildly in terms of the skill required to make a team or play. I've seen one D3 basketball team that my son's U15 team could crush (which I think is rare), and I know there are D3 programs with outstanding teams/coaches that occasionally lose players to top D1 programs. It really depends on the school/conference.

[Anonymous]

A neighbors kid is going to a small liberal arts college in rhode island as he was able to play soccer there. My neighbor is only paying tuition as if it's an in-state school and the rest of the tuition is loans. It's the kids choice, although it does seem like a very expensive way to play soccer for four years.

[Anonymous]

Just say no. If you want to be nice about it, you can explain the club and intramural options at bigger schools. I guarantee many of the intramural soccer teams at UVA would smoke some d3 shithole.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A neighbors kid is going to a small liberal arts college in rhode island as he was able to play soccer there. My neighbor is only paying tuition as if it's an in-state school and the rest of the tuition is loans. It's the kids choice, although it does seem like a very expensive way to play soccer for four years.

He will graduate $50-100,000 in debt and come back to live at home.

[Anonymous]

I fear this because my daughter loves soccer but she's just not all that athletic. The thought of throwing away a prestigious college experience to go play on a horrible team at some nobody college is beyond stupid. Over half the players quit by their junior year. It's a pointless timesink.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I fear this because my daughter loves soccer but she's just not all that athletic. The thought of throwing away a prestigious college experience to go play on a horrible team at some nobody college is beyond stupid. Over half the players quit by their junior year. It's a pointless timesink.

I am confused by this. There are prestigious schools with sports teams that let kids walk on. There are highly competitive sports teams at colleges that have almost no reputation.

If you want your kid to go to a prestigious school. And she wants a small school that will let her walk on to the soccer team. Then use that to narrow the field. Add in merit aid as a factor. There are thousands of schools in this country. You can find something with that combination, although if that's your priority you'll probably need to sacrifice else where (e.g. a school that's more rural or more urban or has colder weather than you want).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If she loves the sport but is bad... Have you ever had her go to clinics or workshops? If not, why not?

NP the kid is a senior. That's irrelevant to this. Way past clinics with younger kids time.

[Anonymous]

I know of several not great athletes who got full ride scholarships to never-heard-of colleges. Guess what? Those free college educations turned into degrees that turned into good jobs. And most of them got to go to grad school (at more well-known schools) because they didn't have the extra burden of paying for undergrad.

This sounds more like an issue for you vs. her. As in, you won't be able to brag that your kid goes to UVA when she's at Randolph-Macon College.

If you really want to deter this path, make some kind of requirement that she has to apply for certain other schools as well. Let her see where she gets in and then decide.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A neighbors kid is going to a small liberal arts college in rhode island as he was able to play soccer there. My neighbor is only paying tuition as if it's an in-state school and the rest of the tuition is loans. It's the kids choice, although it does seem like a very expensive way to play soccer for four years.

This is insane to me! You'd rather saddle your kid with mountains of debt than swallow your pride and pay for some no-name tiny college!?

Jesus! I had shitty parents growing up, but at least they weren't vindictive like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know of several not great athletes who got full ride scholarships to never-heard-of colleges. Guess what? Those free college educations turned into degrees that turned into good jobs. And most of them got to go to grad school (at more well-known schools) because they didn't have the extra burden of paying for undergrad.

This sounds more like an issue for you vs. her. As in, you won't be able to brag that your kid goes to UVA when she's at Randolph-Macon College.

If you really want to deter this path, make some kind of requirement that she has to apply for certain other schools as well. Let her see where she gets in and then decide.

Randolph-Macon is DIII. They do not award athletic scholarships.

[Anonymous]

I really don't understand the issue, OP. Why would you discourage her from applying or feel the need to convince her that she's horrible? Why wouldn't you let her apply?
At this stage you have no idea if you can afford the school or not, or if the school would be a good fit or not - if she applies, maybe she gets in and gets a great merit or FA package, maybe she loves the school, maybe she thrives.
Or maybe she doesn't get in.
Or maybe she does get in, doesn't get any money, and then you say "Larla, I know you want to play quiditch and no name college, but that's not a financial possibility right now."
Or maybe she looks into it a little more, and realizes that while they have a mediocre quiditch team, they don't have a basket weaving major, and she really wants to be a professional underwater basket weaver when she grows up, so she decides all on her own not to apply.

None of those scenarios involve you crushing your daughter. (Who, I'm sure, knows exactly how good she is. She just sounds much more mature and well balanced than her mother, and still enjoys the sport even if she isn't a star.)

[Anonymous]

Most d3 teams are barely above high school caliber, with fewer spectators. If you have money to throw away go ahead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A neighbors kid is going to a small liberal arts college in rhode island as he was able to play soccer there. My neighbor is only paying tuition as if it's an in-state school and the rest of the tuition is loans. It's the kids choice, although it does seem like a very expensive way to play soccer for four years.

This is insane to me! You'd rather saddle your kid with mountains of debt than swallow your pride and pay for some no-name tiny college!?

Jesus! I had shitty parents growing up, but at least they weren't vindictive like this.

Did it ever occur to you that some people simply don't have the money to pay for private college tuition?