does DIL sound mad?

[Anonymous]

And DIL will still expect me to babysit this weekend. I babysit most weekends

[Anonymous]

She may have you babysit this weekend but she will see you as free labor rather than as a cherished woman in her child's (and her) life. The wedge you constructed will be there too. and you have helped her design and build it for her daughter too. You may have been 100% right (wow science apparently can back you up!) but you really lost something here OP - especially as you continue to build your defenses and cling to your righteousness. I am a new MIL and I keep note of acts like this as guides of how not to be.

[Anonymous]

WTF is wrong with you?? 3 generations of women = your mom; you; your DD; and ALL your female grandkids. I realize you consider your DD's daughter to belong to your family MORE BUT consider this -- someone else's sperm was involved in making your favored granddaughter -- presumably your son in law's sperm. Someone else's egg was involved in making your other granddaughter -- your DILs. Genetically both grandkids only half belong to your family -- so don't act like, oh my favored granddaughter is ALL MINE -- she's not.

You were rude -- to say go take your pic with your mom!? WTF?? Hope you won't hold it against your son when he and the wife spend more holidays with her side and those grandkids are not nearly as interested in you once they get a choice -- i.e. once they're teens and can give you the time of day or not. They will realize their cousins were always more "important."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She told you exactly what she would have wanted--for her daughter to be included. Whether you agree or not, that seems pretty direct and not passive aggressive. And although you may technically be correct, you don't seem very kind or gracious.

+1

[Anonymous]

You were rude but she's not too bright.

[Anonymous]

Age clearly hasn't taught you grace or wisdom, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She may have you babysit this weekend but she will see you as free labor rather than as a cherished woman in her child's (and her) life. The wedge you constructed will be there too. and you have helped her design and build it for her daughter too. You may have been 100% right (wow science apparently can back you up!) but you really lost something here OP - especially as you continue to build your defenses and cling to your righteousness. I am a new MIL and I keep note of acts like this as guides of how not to be.

This was a pic taken with my cell phone today when my daughter and I went to visit my mother. This wasn't planned

[Anonymous]

I do see where I came off as rude. I meant it as an explanation of why I put the caption that I did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She may have you babysit this weekend but she will see you as free labor rather than as a cherished woman in her child's (and her) life. The wedge you constructed will be there too. and you have helped her design and build it for her daughter too. You may have been 100% right (wow science apparently can back you up!) but you really lost something here OP - especially as you continue to build your defenses and cling to your righteousness. I am a new MIL and I keep note of acts like this as guides of how not to be.

This was a pic taken with my cell phone today when my daughter and I went to visit my mother. This wasn't planned

It is NOT the photo - it was how you acted/responded to your DIL. You could have so easily said - isn't it amazing? I want to get one with Larla too! We should get all the girls in it - and then the boys. Have you done this with your mother?

[Anonymous]

But isn't her daughter also your granddaughter and great granddaughter?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do see where I came off as rude. I meant it as an explanation of why I put the caption that I did.

Ask yourself--do you need to be right? Do you need to be justified? Or do you need to cultivate good relationships?

Would have cost you nothing to simply say, "Looking forward to my next photo op with Emily!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Millennials VERY quick to break family ties. Be careful.

Bacause many baby boomers were shitty, self absorbed parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But isn't her daughter also your granddaughter and great granddaughter?

This wasnt a planned photo. DIL wasn't there and neither was her daughter. I put the caption because quite frankly it was a picture of 4 generations. DIL felt the caption was rude because it didn't include all of her grandkids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But isn't her daughter also your granddaughter and great granddaughter?

This wasnt a planned photo. DIL wasn't there and neither was her daughter. I put the caption because quite frankly it was a picture of 4 generations. DIL felt the caption was rude because it didn't include all of her grandkids.

You just can't admit that you didn't respond with grace or kindness, can you?

[Anonymous]

Rude and hurtful. Wow.