Men- Why do you sleep with married women?

[Anonymous]

People have sex with unavailable people because they like them that way. It gives them a sense of security to know its got some clear boundaries that they don't have to set. The marriage does that for them.

[Anonymous]

DH here: I don't, and have never been unfaithful, but the idea of taking another man's wife is certainly erotic. I suspect that is a common feeling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone here think the man should be chastised as breaking up a family and destroying a marriage?

Yeah, it's a pretty nasty thing to do, but I still feel more visceral bad feelings towards a woman who cheats with a married man. Probably because I am a woman, and if another person knowingly impinged on my territory I would find a way to inflict some pretty terrible revenge. Yes, of course I'd be mad at my DH too, but he wouldn't have been the one who tried to "compete" with me so to speak, so the feeling is different.

In any case, playing a role in breaking down a family is lousy, regardless of gender.

Nobody is worried about you and your revenge. Your post tells me that this is something you worry about with your DH, however. If he knows that you're the insecure type that will blame the OW more than him, I don't see an incentive for him not to have someone on the side.

I am the PP, and these feelings precede my DH, who shows no signs of wanting to cheat.

Just abstractly, the idea of another woman encroaching on my territory brings out very aggressive feelings in me. I think there is something fairly primal about it.

Maybe because I am not really worried about my DH cheating it's hard for me to imagine how I would feel towards HIM. He's pretty devoted. But if it ever happens I'll let ya know since you seem so preoccupied by it!

Suuure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't have to celebrate birthdays or holidays with her. I don't have to take her in public. I don't spend money on her. I can blow her off any time I want and she can't raise a stink about it. We don't have to discuss our future. She believes lies like, I wish we met under other circumstances.

She's perfect.

Why can't she raise a stink about you blowing her off? As your post shows, an AP has one job and that is to show up. If she's not miffed that you blow her off its probably because she's smart and has another AP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't have to celebrate birthdays or holidays with her. I don't have to take her in public. I don't spend money on her. I can blow her off any time I want and she can't raise a stink about it. We don't have to discuss our future. She believes lies like, I wish we met under other circumstances.

She's perfect.

Why can't she raise a stink about you blowing her off? As your post shows, an AP has one job and that is to show up. If she's not miffed that you blow her off its probably because she's smart and has another AP.

Because she has to pretend it's just sex and that she doesn't care. She knows I will move on if she starts the drama. She knows I don't care if she screws others, she's married remember. "Your no longer my #3"

Married women that cheat are a specific breed, they think they are feminists but they have the lowest self esteem and have intimacy issues.

I don't want intimacy so it's a perfect fit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't have to celebrate birthdays or holidays with her. I don't have to take her in public. I don't spend money on her. I can blow her off any time I want and she can't raise a stink about it. We don't have to discuss our future. She believes lies like, I wish we met under other circumstances.

She's perfect.

Why can't she raise a stink about you blowing her off? As your post shows, an AP has one job and that is to show up. If she's not miffed that you blow her off its probably because she's smart and has another AP.

Because she has to pretend it's just sex and that she doesn't care. She knows I will move on if she starts the drama. She knows I don't care if she screws others, she's married remember. "Your no longer my #3"

Married women that cheat are a specific breed, they think they are feminists but they have the lowest self esteem and have intimacy issues.

I don't want intimacy so it's a perfect fit.

Some married women like variety and no strings attached sex with men other than their spouse just like married men. Nothing to do with feminism or low self esteem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't have to celebrate birthdays or holidays with her. I don't have to take her in public. I don't spend money on her. I can blow her off any time I want and she can't raise a stink about it. We don't have to discuss our future. She believes lies like, I wish we met under other circumstances.

She's perfect.

Why can't she raise a stink about you blowing her off? As your post shows, an AP has one job and that is to show up. If she's not miffed that you blow her off its probably because she's smart and has another AP.

Because she has to pretend it's just sex and that she doesn't care. She knows I will move on if she starts the drama. She knows I don't care if she screws others, she's married remember. "Your no longer my #3"

Married women that cheat are a specific breed, they think they are feminists but they have the lowest self esteem and have intimacy issues.

I don't want intimacy so it's a perfect fit.

Some married women like variety and no strings attached sex with men other than their spouse just like married men. Nothing to do with feminism or low self esteem.

Keep telling yourself that. Like shooting fish in a bucket.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH here: I don't, and have never been unfaithful, but the idea of taking another man's wife is certainly erotic. I suspect that is a common feeling.

I'm female, 44, happily married 18 years. After a lot of indecision, I recently slept with another man. Although he was a complete gentleman, and very focused, I did feel him taking another man's wife was a big deal for him. Sort of an alpha male conquest thing.

[Anonymous]

Maybe he just had a thing for archaeologists who dig up eight year old threads?

[Anonymous]

This is an easy one. With a married woman you get to have sex without putting in any work and you don't have to put up with any bullshit.

[Anonymous]

Sex is sex. If you don't get that, then you don't get it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have an AP and I am a married women. My AP is not married and I always wonder why he does not want to be with a single lady...I am posting because I saw the other thread where the question was asked of women sleeping with married men. Wondering if there are men who also do what my AP is doing and why?

You are human garbage.

[Anonymous]

Married women that cheat are a specific breed, they think they are feminists but they have the lowest self esteem and have intimacy issues.

THIS! These women just need to feel like they can still pull a guy to try and fill the real hole in their life - their empty self-esteem. The married women on this thread bragging about their APs need therapy more than anything else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH here: I don't, and have never been unfaithful, but the idea of taking another man's wife is certainly erotic. I suspect that is a common feeling.

I'm female, 44, happily married 18 years. After a lot of indecision, I recently slept with another man. Although he was a complete gentleman, and very focused, I did feel him taking another man's wife was a big deal for him. Sort of an alpha male conquest thing.

Scumbag.

[Anonymous]

novaguy wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only married women I have had sex with I had the consent of the husband to do so.

OP here, that is hot! I wish I had the consent of my DH, haha

I would give my DW consent if she asked.

DH gave me permission because he is lower drive but seriously I don’t have the time to hunt down another guy. I just need DH to step it up!