My mom punched me....

[Anonymous]

What your mom did was wrong. Absolutely wrong.

However, you cannot control your mom. You can only control yourself. That said, here is my take:

Mistake #1: I ended up asking my parents if I could just move back home for a month and they agreed.
Mistake #2: ...say "obviously I didn't it on purpose"
Mistake #3: I told her that I'm 27 and don't need her to tell me what I can and can't drink and to please keep her comments to herself
Mistake #4: 5 minutes later I tell her that I'm not going to listen to her be a bitch towards me and that she needs to calm down.

Don't stay with them again. If you do stay with them again, and your batshit crazy hostess asks why you left your shit on the table, you say, "oh I'm so sorry. Thanks for telling me, mom!".
If she launches into a tirade about how that drink is bad for you, you say, "I know you're right mom. I'll stop drinking these..."

As for this incident, this would be enough for me to never see her again. Problem solved.

Going forward, you need to learn how to not engage with crazy. You can't win with crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
What your mom did was wrong. Absolutely wrong.

However, you cannot control your mom. You can only control yourself. That said, here is my take:

Mistake #1: I ended up asking my parents if I could just move back home for a month and they agreed.
Mistake #2: ...say "obviously I didn't it on purpose"
Mistake #3: I told her that I'm 27 and don't need her to tell me what I can and can't drink and to please keep her comments to herself
Mistake #4: 5 minutes later I tell her that I'm not going to listen to her be a bitch towards me and that she needs to calm down.

Don't stay with them again. If you do stay with them again, and your batshit crazy hostess asks why you left your shit on the table, you say, "oh I'm so sorry. Thanks for telling me, mom!".
If she launches into a tirade about how that drink is bad for you, you say, "I know you're right mom. I'll stop drinking these..."

As for this incident, this would be enough for me to never see her again. Problem solved.

Going forward, you need to learn how to not engage with crazy. You can't win with crazy.

So she needs to allow her mom to be a crazy Cunt and just go along with her? I wouldn't be able to hold back either

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
What your mom did was wrong. Absolutely wrong.

However, you cannot control your mom. You can only control yourself. That said, here is my take:

Mistake #1: I ended up asking my parents if I could just move back home for a month and they agreed.
Mistake #2: ...say "obviously I didn't it on purpose"
Mistake #3: I told her that I'm 27 and don't need her to tell me what I can and can't drink and to please keep her comments to herself
Mistake #4: 5 minutes later I tell her that I'm not going to listen to her be a bitch towards me and that she needs to calm down.

Don't stay with them again. If you do stay with them again, and your batshit crazy hostess asks why you left your shit on the table, you say, "oh I'm so sorry. Thanks for telling me, mom!".
If she launches into a tirade about how that drink is bad for you, you say, "I know you're right mom. I'll stop drinking these..."

As for this incident, this would be enough for me to never see her again. Problem solved.

Going forward, you need to learn how to not engage with crazy. You can't win with crazy.

So she needs to allow her mom to be a crazy Cunt and just go along with her? I wouldn't be able to hold back either

Nope, she can NOT STAY WITH HER and then this would all be moot.

[Anonymous]

For those of you saying OP shouldn't stay with her parents...it's a hard pill to swallow not to have a reliable mom and dad to help you out. It's something that everyone should have and it suck when you don't.


For those of you saying not to escalate, engage, etc., that's easy to say as an armchair quarterback. It is very hurtful to have a parent treat you this way and all situations are emotionally charged. But yes, OP does need to try and de-escalate but it's friggin HARD. Therapy and distance from mom will help.

My mother sounds a lot like OPs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For those of you saying OP shouldn't stay with her parents...it's a hard pill to swallow not to have a reliable mom and dad to help you out. It's something that everyone should have and it suck when you don't.


For those of you saying not to escalate, engage, etc., that's easy to say as an armchair quarterback. It is very hurtful to have a parent treat you this way and all situations are emotionally charged. But yes, OP does need to try and de-escalate but it's friggin HARD. Therapy and distance from mom will help.

My mother sounds a lot like OPs

You seem to think PPs (including myself) don't have experience with this. Our advice is not 'armchair quarterbacking', it's advice from those who have been/are in the trenches. It's based on having experienced this behavior, having years of therapy and practicing what was learned in therapy. Anything difficult requires practice and no one said it was easy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For those of you saying OP shouldn't stay with her parents...it's a hard pill to swallow not to have a reliable mom and dad to help you out. It's something that everyone should have and it suck when you don't.


For those of you saying not to escalate, engage, etc., that's easy to say as an armchair quarterback. It is very hurtful to have a parent treat you this way and all situations are emotionally charged. But yes, OP does need to try and de-escalate but it's friggin HARD. Therapy and distance from mom will help.

My mother sounds a lot like OPs

+1

Therapy and set some boundaries with your mom if you decide to be around her or communicate with her in the future. Tell her if she physically or mentally abuses you agin that you will choose not to spend time with her. I have a Batshit cray mom and had to set boundaries, especially as it pertained to my kid, because my mom is sneaky. She was terrified at not being able to see her only grandchild so she got her shit together and respects my boundaries most of the time. When she doesn't, she feels the pain of being cutoff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are 27. Act like an adult and don't be around her.

+1 grow up OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound a lot alike. She snaps at you, you snap back, she swings at you, you call her names....seek help. And move out.

ITA