Anyone else get married and had no idea what your spouses salary was at the time?

[Anonymous]

DH and I had pretty big financial goals. Prior to marriage we bought a house together, turned it into a rental and then bought another house together and then we got married. Of course we knew each other's income. We played with the mortgage deduction (as single people) to decide who took what amount in order to maximize our tax savings.

I'm not sure how you marry someone not knowing that. We've been together since college and as a TEAM that wanted to be even stronger together, we quickly melded finances and maximized what we could do with our combined income. As a result, first house at 22 and Iwe've each been maxing out our 401ks since that age as well. I could not imagine marrying someone and finding out later that we are financially incompatible.

[Anonymous]

What a horribly irresponsible decision! Now I understand why so many people argue about money. This is one of the very key items that need to be known before you make this commitment.

Of course I knew. We knew each other's financial position completely. We were young, so neither of us made much, and we both had debt, but we knew enough to realize that we were on the same page in terms of how we spend, how we save, and how we invest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I could ballpark but I don't know still what my DH makes exactly.

Don't you review your tax return that you sign every year? I made sure that I knew my husbands FICO score before getting married.

[Anonymous]

Found out during dating because it was very important to me. I did not go to law school to support a man. Also had a full financial disclosure (part of prenup process).

[Anonymous]

I didn't. Which is kind of silly since it was posted online.

[Anonymous]

No way would I do that. Almost got engaged w/o knowing the other person's true financial situation fully when I was just out of college. Luckily I didn't and dodged a bullet there.

[Anonymous]

I get it. I knew roughly how much he was making and how much I was making, but we were young and it didn't matter that much. I disagree that you have to achieve a certain financial status to get married, as a pp said. Two can live cheaper than one, even. Now I do think you should achieve some financial stability before having children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yup. Married and did not even consider HHI. I should of though....

Should HAVE

[Anonymous]

And while I wouldn't condone total financial blindness, it is icking me out how many posters on here seem to see snagging a husband as a financial transaction.

[Anonymous]

I didnt know either, it was not important.
I had a guess as to what he made, i knew he had no debt. That is all that mattered.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you get married not knwoing uour spouse's income? How do you make a budget without that information?

Many people such as us, dont have actual budgets.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Still don't know and don't care. We married late and keep our financial affairs generally separate, just each contributing toward the common household.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you get married not knwoing uour spouse's income? How do you make a budget without that information?

We don't need to budget because we live well below our means and always have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you get married not knwoing uour spouse's income? How do you make a budget without that information?

We don't need to budget because we live well below our means and always have.

How can you know what is below means if you don't know what the means are?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you get married not knwoing uour spouse's income? How do you make a budget without that information?

We don't need to budget because we live well below our means and always have.

How can you know what is below means if you don't know what the means are?

The question was how do you make a budget without that information?
The answer stands.

I never asked dh's pay before we married, I knew he had a good education and good earning potential. I also didn't need the info until after we were married.