almost 6 weeks, losing my mind

[Anonymous]

OP again. PP, that is EXACTLY what i was doing. it is truly miserable. although luckily my husband has been more supportive than yours. best of luck to you, and please take your own advice and give yourself a break when you can!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. thank you all so much! who knew dcum could be so nice?

yesterday afternoon and evening, and this morning so far, have been a big improvement. he has mostly nursed well, no screaming, and a minimum of fussing. i also got a lot more sleep last night than the night before, which is a huge help. i am definitely going to ask the pediatrician about reflux though, since from what i've seen after googling it sounds like that could definitely be part of the problem.

i think my real problem with using formula, if we need to, is that it means i've failed at breastfeeding - and i am not used to that! i know logically that he will be just fine on formula - i was raised on it, after all! - but it's hard emotionally. we will take it one day - maybe even one feeding - at a time and see how it goes... i have been saying to my husband for 2 weeks now that i'm just going to quit breastfeeding altogether and it hasn't happened yet, so i guess i'm not fully ready to give up.

thanks again to you all. i really do appreciate all the kind words and advice and knowing that this time is hard for everyone!

Honestly, you have a great attitude. Take it one day, one feeding at a time. The six week mark is truly the hardest. I found breastfeeding to get much more enjoyable/easy around 7 or 8 weeks. During the tough times, I just thought about 1) how many calories breastfeeding was burning -- very helpful since I was so hungry I was eating everything in sight!! and 2) that if it all worked, breastfeeding could be quite convenient and cheap.

So take it one day at a time, and know that if you end up deciding to use formula, you haven't failed. You sound like a great mom.

[Anonymous]

That's great that you had a day that was a little better than normal. Those early weeks are so hard especially with no help. I remember crying when I was talking to my dh. I said, I really thought I could do this by myself. It is tough.

One other thing I haven't seen mentioned is my dd#2 was fussy, so the ped recommended that I get off dairy in case that was causing some stomach issues for her. It really did seem to help when I gave up dairy entirely.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry to hear about your difficult time. You sound like me when my baby was that old. My baby was terribly unhappy for the first three months, cried for hours on end, was only happy if I was walking around with him, holding him or in a sling. I lost all of my pregnancy weight within that time because he was BF all the time, he had me constantly moving. He also was diagnosed with acid reflux and improved after going on Prevacid, though still fussy.

Truthfully, I was lapsing into either PPD or sheer exhaustion, and we had no family help, so we ended up getting a post-partum doula who held the baby while I napped and made meals for me. It helped so much. We could barely afford it but it did get me through the worst. The one thing that she told me that was really helpful is that babies under 12 weeks old can stay awake for only 90 minutes at a time, and I had been mistaking his tiredness for hunger. We would rock him to sleep just before the 90 minute mark and that helped alot. Also, I would wear him in a sling and walk with him close to the 90 min mark. He would fall asleep, then I would nap too.

A nipple shield helped us get through nipple soreness. We used it for 4 weeks then didn't need it.

He is 10 months old, off the Prevacid, and as happy as can be, still breastfeeding. If BF is not working out for you, he will be fine with formula--most importantly, his mom needs to be happy. That said, going to formula might help or it might not. It's hard to say. Whatever you decide, take care of yourself as much as you can, please.

[Anonymous]

OP, do what you can to connect with other moms. Don't go it alone like I did. You should not have to. Like the woman who mentioned sealegs...and karma...she hit the nail on the head! I watched all my friends' moms help out - even MIL'S! My heart felt like it was repeatedly breaking, even thugh I had this wonderful bundle! I joined LLL of Arlington. No offense to them, but they made me feel like if I held my kid 25/8 and went to the bathroom with my kid in my arms, I still wasn't doing enough. Not all LLL are like this, I presume, and this was a few years back. Stick with whomever fits your personality, and whomever encourages you! You can do it!