almost 6 weeks, losing my mind

[Drey76]

Pat at the Breastfeeding Center was my savior. I had problems for about 6 months. Lots of mastitis and I had yeast in my breast duct (all very painful). At the beginning poor latch, sore nipples, bleeding, blisters and etc. I just took it one moment at a time. I said let's get through this and then if I can't take it I can stop. I breastfed for over 1 year (which is what I had originally wanted). Good luck. No matter what at least you tried.

[Anonymous]

I understand your frustration, I really do. I tried to BF, and gave up 3 weeks into it, and never looked back. I've always said the first 4 months were complete HELL and when you're in it, it's dark. Not saying we don't love our children, but those are some very rough months. Just know that it will be over soon and there will be light. Don't beat yourself up, do what you can do and if anyone tries to shame you, shut your eyes and cover your ears.

I promise, it will get better.

[Anonymous]

i too was wondering if the baby might have acid reflux. ours did and prevacid change our lives. ours also never latched so mix pumping and formula.(but certainly never 10x a day) i agree with those who say try whatever combo of formula and pumping and bfing that makes life manageable

[Anonymous]

OP-- take a Saturday morning, have your hubby watch the baby, and go to the salon... get your haircut and a pedicure... then grab Starbucks, relax some more, and come home. Seriously. At 6 weeks, I realized that I had spent most of my days in sweats on the couch since the birth-- I didn't even feel like myself anymore. I needed to get out of the house in a bad way and just spend a few hours on me. Take a morning, pamper yourself, and then you can think about all these things with a clearer head. The first six weeks are so tiring. It really does get better though, as everyone says! Hang in there...

[Anonymous]

My first month was miserable. I used a nipple shield and then couldn't get my son to latch without it. At three months I felt like I was pretty confident and was able to go until a year and now do morning and night at 19 mos. Like you, I was pumping about 6-8 times per day. No real advice here - just some emphathy from someone else who was there. All of a sudden it was like a switch went off and baby and I "got it" = and that was around the 6-8 week mark.

[Anonymous]

I'm a mom who had breastfeeding troubles too, used a nipple shield, pumped, worried if she was getting enough, etc.

I found the lactation consultants useless. I'm sure there are good ones out there, I just couldn't find one.

This is going to sound weird, but I actually learned to nurse well from the internet -- the most useful stuff I found was to google around about breastfeeding and watch videos or read stuff on the web about actual breastfeeding technique (not how great it is for them and my womanly powers....) I needed someone to show me exactly how to hold the baby, get it to open up, place my nipple, etc. I also needed a lot of ideas about what to try, because not all of the nursing positions worked for me.

I also found it helped to pump for a few minutes only right before I nursed. Counter-intuitive, pumping before nursing, but it really helped. I think that in the early weeks my breasts were so full, that it was like asking my baby to use her tiny mouth to eat a giant hamburger -- not gonna happen. Or it might have been some kind of "pump priming" effect. Whatever, between the pumping and better info from the internet, baby and I finally got in a groove.

It's been 8 years since that experience, so I don't have any specific websites to recommend, but I'm sure there's probably a whole YouTube channel devoted to breastfeeding by now (ok, maybe not...).

Of course, baby #2 never had a problem nursing, he just threw it up all the time, but that's another thread.

good luck

[Anonymous]

Another new poster here who wants to offer support that IT IS OKAY to switch to formula. It's not worth it if you are miserable and having a hard time enjoying your new child because of it.
I had a horrible time getting my son to latch. Like a PP, I saw three lactation consultants and for some reason, none of them helped. Finally - like another PP recommended, I switched to exclusively pumping for a while. I had plenty of milk so ultimately he got about six weeks of breast milk and then some additional that was stored up in the freezer. It was really hard mentally to make the switch to formula and let my supply dry up but breast feeding just didn't work out for me (and admittedly, I probably wasn't as committed to making it work as others might be when I started having problems). However, once I had moved on and dropped the guilt, everything fell into place. DS is now 3.5 and is a very happy and HEALTHY kid. As someone else said, yes, BF'ing is great and very beneficial but formula is not the Devil. You need to do whatever you feel is right for you and your baby and will make you the best possible parent. If that is formula feeding, then so be it. Hang in there and I'm so happy to see all the support you've received here.

[Anonymous]

Dear Lord! I am so inspired and impressed by your dedication and resolve to breastfeed. I am breastfeeding my 8-week old (plus 1 bottle every few days), and I don't have much to add to all the advice above. But I will say that the end of week 5/all of week 6 was the absolute hardest due to the growth spurt, so hang in there for 2 more weeks if you can!

I have had an easy time of breastfeeding, but that growth spurt was insane. My baby was not herself - crazy hunger, rooting - all that you described - and she barely noticed me as I withered away on the couch. She literally feed or sucked non-stop for hours on end, but that is the biological purpose of the growth spurt (to establish your long-term milk supply) - it wasn't because she wasn't getting enough milk.

By week 7 and now 8, she is again super engaged, sweet, smiling, etc. and eating WAY less frequently. Total night and day, and so much better now! Plus I have real joy in breastfeeding.

If this doesn't work out for you, then you get total props for trying so hard. But there may be a great breastfeeding future for you and your son behind this particular week. Either way, you sound like a great mom. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Someone made a suggestion about pumping a bit first. I did this too because the milk let down quicker and the my baby was not as frustrated. Did it for a few weeks until latch got better.

[Anonymous]

THe growth spurt/hungry baby thing at about 6 weeks can be horrible esp. if you are otherwise having difficulties breastfeeding (or rather your baby is).

[Anonymous]

Liek a PP said, it also could be reflux. Mine all had reflux which resulted with screaming at the breast at times b/c they were having heartburn like problems. Zantac helped and I think there is another stronger medicine out there too. Check with your pedi.

[Anonymous]

I don't think I saw it posted on here, but if your baby likes the carrier he may also like a swing - giving you a little break.

I was one of those moms who thought I'd breastfeed for a year and wouldn't load our house full of baby gear. By 6 weeks DS was on formula and happily snoozing away in a swing. My mantra was "by whatever means!" So whatever works to 1) keep your sanity and 2) keep the baby happy is OKAY.

The first 6 weeks were *so hard.* But day by day things improved and they will for you too.

[Anonymous]

Hi - mom of 3 here. #1 had no breastfeeding issues, #2 never latched properly, so got bottle-fed pumped milk - #3 is fine with nursing, but has reflux. Good times!!
I will agree with the previous posters who suggested pumping off each side for a few minutes before nursing. It allowed my son to nurse without having to deal with my let-down reflex, which was too much for him. It also allowed him to fill up mostly on hindmilk, which supposedly has more calories. Check also about the reflux - my daughter has it, and it makes life pretty miserable until treated (the twisting and headbanging can make you feel like you are losing your mind). You can pump and bottle feed if you feel strongly about breastmilk vs. formula - I did it for six months with #2 until my supply dried up. He never did get the latch correct, so we just bottle-fed the pumped breastmilk. He's still the most attached 5 year old I know.
Finally, while I agree with the previous posters who have mentioned that formula is just fine (it is, you know) - I would suggest asking your mother and your husband's mother whether you, your husband or any siblings had allergies/food intolerances as a baby or young child. I found out after the fact that my husband had a milk protein allergy as a baby that he outgrew. Both my sons ended up on Nutramigen, but not before plenty of projectile vomiting took place. If I had known, I would have breastfed #1 longer, as the hypoallergenic formulas are unbelievably expensive and taste terrible to boot. Probably wouldn't be an issue for you, but it was an unpleasant surprise for me.
Good luck - it will get better, but you are justifiably worn out right now. Whenever you can, be kind to yourself - you've earned it.

[Anonymous]

OP here. thank you all so much! who knew dcum could be so nice?

yesterday afternoon and evening, and this morning so far, have been a big improvement. he has mostly nursed well, no screaming, and a minimum of fussing. i also got a lot more sleep last night than the night before, which is a huge help. i am definitely going to ask the pediatrician about reflux though, since from what i've seen after googling it sounds like that could definitely be part of the problem.

i think my real problem with using formula, if we need to, is that it means i've failed at breastfeeding - and i am not used to that! i know logically that he will be just fine on formula - i was raised on it, after all! - but it's hard emotionally. we will take it one day - maybe even one feeding - at a time and see how it goes... i have been saying to my husband for 2 weeks now that i'm just going to quit breastfeeding altogether and it hasn't happened yet, so i guess i'm not fully ready to give up.

thanks again to you all. i really do appreciate all the kind words and advice and knowing that this time is hard for everyone!

[Anonymous]

My baby was five weeks yesterday, and we have been havng BF issues as well. He will only get half his feed from nursing because he's a "lazy eater.". I have been working with the lactation consultant as well, and have spent a small fortune as well. They have instructed me to nurse, then supplement with a bottle of breast milk, then pump to keep up my milk supply - all this at every feeding. I spend most of my day going through this routine. It takes a long time with burping and settling him down so I can pump. He is also having (we think) issues with gas, so he is up from about 9pm to 2am every night shrieking with discomfort. ANYWAY what I wanted to say is that while EBF is the gold standard, I am getting no support from my family for choosing to go through this "crazy" routine simply to ensure that my baby gets breast milk exclusively. My husband thinks I should be sleeping more during the day so I can stay up with the baby at night (read: so DH can sleep through the night). So the poster who said you are judged either way is right!! Your child has had breast milk for 6 weeks and that's great, so I agree that you should gove yourself a break. I have started freezing my pumped milk so if I decide to stop BF, I'll at least have some extra stored so he's getting breast milk a little longer.