Women: when did men stop noticing you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand women who 'only care what DH thinks'. I'd want to be universally attractive, if not for anyone else then at least for myself.

You want to be "universally attractive" "for yourself."

I think you may want to focus a little less on your looks and maybe pick up a logic book. Your brain sounds like it atrophied from lack of use.

[Anonymous]

I'm late 30s and get noticed and hit on fairly often.

I have noticed that I am completely invisible if I have a small child with me. The difference when I have a baby with me is striking. If I am in a bad mood and have corresponding grumpy looks and body language, I don't get any attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand women who 'only care what DH thinks'. I'd want to be universally attractive, if not for anyone else then at least for myself.

You want to be "universally attractive" "for yourself."

I think you may want to focus a little less on your looks and maybe pick up a logic book. Your brain sounds like it atrophied from lack of use.

Signed, someone ugly inside and out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand women who 'only care what DH thinks'. I'd want to be universally attractive, if not for anyone else then at least for myself.

I'm a PP who posted above about only caring about what DH thinks. I suppose that I do care what others think (I dress professionally and carefully for work, for example, because I want to be taken seriously and respected), but I'm way past the point of caring whether men other than my husband find me physically attractive. That's what I mean, not "I'm a slob with no self-respect and can't be bothered to change out of my pjs in the morning".

+1

I take care with my appearance, even on the weekends, but I don't care whether random guys want to sleep with me or not.

I think I'm pretty much invisible in that way when I'm out with my kids. When I'm by myself, I do get a few looks and comments, but definitely not as many as when I was in my 20s. I weigh the same now as I did then, but, while I think I look pretty good for my age (38), I don't look like I'm in my 20s anymore. And that's okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They stopped noticing when you stopped trying.

I can barely step out for a happy hour without some young buck offering to buy me a drink.

-Attractive, successful DC female executive in her mid 40s

This. I am tall, thin, and good looking. I watch my weight within the bounds of reason, wear heels and make up, keep my hair past my shoulders and still wear fashionable, tastefully fitted clothes. I have crow's feet and my breasts are not perky any more. Men still notice me and look at me with desire. Aging is not a social death sentence unless you let it be. Jerry Hall is still sexy in her 60s, Naomi Campbell is still sexy in her 40s, Halle Berry is almost 50 and still sexy, Carmen Dell'Orifice is still sexy in her 80s.

[Anonymous]

Agree that you can be sexy at any age. There's a charisma that goes a long way. That usually comes with confidence from knowing you look good.

[Anonymous]

When I think I'm hot I exercise more and work towards that ideal. And I get positive feedback. When I just thought "it's over" and stop trying the attention stops.

[Anonymous]

I'm (quite) overweight and men hit on me all the time. Still waiting at 39 to be invisible.... DD does put a damper on things a bit but not all men can be deterred.

[Anonymous]

This discussion reminds me of Amy Schumer's Last Fuckable Day skit. http://youtu.be/XPpsI8mWKmg

[Anonymous]

They stopped noticing when you stopped trying.

I can barely step out for a happy hour without some young buck offering to buy me a drink.

-Attractive, successful DC female executive in her mid 40s


This. I am tall, thin, and good looking. I watch my weight within the bounds of reason, wear heels and make up, keep my hair past my shoulders and still wear fashionable, tastefully fitted clothes. I have crow's feet and my breasts are not perky any more. Men still notice me and look at me with desire. Aging is not a social death sentence unless you let it be. Jerry Hall is still sexy in her 60s, Naomi Campbell is still sexy in her 40s, Halle Berry is almost 50 and still sexy, Carmen Dell'Orifice is still sexy in her 80s.

Executive is the key word here, everything window dressing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm (quite) overweight and men hit on me all the time. Still waiting at 39 to be invisible.... DD does put a damper on things a bit but not all men can be deterred.

You are probably even more attractive and look years younger because of the extra weight you carry. It works wonders to prevent wrinkles and other tell tale signs of aging.

Funny how that happens. The women who are most concerned with "looking good" often age the fastest because they deprive their bodies of needed fat

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This discussion reminds me of Amy Schumer's Last Fuckable Day skit. http://youtu.be/XPpsI8mWKmg

Ha! Yes, so absurd!

[Anonymous]

I'm 41 and most days I'm not trying terribly hard and schlepping around a kid or two OR with my DH.

If I go out alone or with a group of women and I make an effort to look nice, men still notice me. I imagine this will be the case for the rest of my life depending on the age of the guys involved. I don't think a group of hot 20-somethings will ever notice me again in my life if there is something better to look at. Not losing sleep over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They stopped noticing when you stopped trying.

I can barely step out for a happy hour without some young buck offering to buy me a drink.

-Attractive, successful DC female executive in her mid 40s

This. I am tall, thin, and good looking. I watch my weight within the bounds of reason, wear heels and make up, keep my hair past my shoulders and still wear fashionable, tastefully fitted clothes. I have crow's feet and my breasts are not perky any more. Men still notice me and look at me with desire. Aging is not a social death sentence unless you let it be. Jerry Hall is still sexy in her 60s, Naomi Campbell is still sexy in her 40s, Halle Berry is almost 50 and still sexy, Carmen Dell'Orifice is still sexy in her 80s.

Female Executive here:
Glad that someone else can relate to me. I'm divorced and had one kid in my early 30s with my ex-husband. So I know what pregnancy does to the body. Still, that hasn't stopped me from pursuing both my fitness and career goals.

As for "young bucks," I meant guys in their late 20s to mid-30s. While men might be pigs, Marines take it to a whole other (shameless) level of piggery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They stopped noticing when you stopped trying.

I can barely step out for a happy hour without some young buck offering to buy me a drink.

-Attractive, successful DC female executive in her mid 40s

Agree with this. Am 45 and I still get noticed. The older I get the more effort I put into making sure that I look good. I dont care about the men (and usually ignore them anyway) but the confidence boost is just amazing.