MIL: "You need to exercise"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would respond, "And you need to mind your own business."

Or, "Your son doesn't mind f*cking me, so I don't know why you're concerned."

The second one will definitely shut her up.

Would either of you actually say these things?? I never would, regardless of how rude she was. The first is too confrontational and the second is just unacceptable. Dh would never forgive me, and my own mom would be horrified at how low-class and crude that is. And yes, I care about that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would respond, "And you need to mind your own business."

Or, "Your son doesn't mind f*cking me, so I don't know why you're concerned."

The second one will definitely shut her up.

Would either of you actually say these things?? I never would, regardless of how rude she was. The first is too confrontational and the second is just unacceptable. Dh would never forgive me, and my own mom would be horrified at how low-class and crude that is. And yes, I care about that.

Another PP here whi ignored and laughed at my MIL when she said something like this. PP is right. To make an explict comment about your sex life with her son because she said something you did not like IS crude! "MYOB" is also a tricky thing to say to a close family member. These are what I call "point of no return" comments. Once you say something like that, your relationship with MIL is functionally over and your DH won't be too pleased either. Diplomacy and taking the high road would be appropriate for this type of comment. Now if she said "you are turning into a fat ass," that's different. LOL

[Anonymous]

I would have bust out laughing

[Anonymous]

Why don't you think that she is genuine ? Can't she just worry about your general well being, physical and mentall? I would be happy if someone would remind me that I need to take care about myself when my head was spinning around new baby? Where all this negativity is coming from?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it's not a weight-related question.

And, she's right, OP: You do need to exercise. I say that without ever having seen you.

Everyone needs to exercise.

Please keep your comments to yourself unless you are someone's doctor.

Everyone knows exercise is important. MYOB and you will be happier in life.

[Anonymous]

My MIL told me the same thing- she was right. I was horrified at the time, but got over it and did get in better shape (which was for myself not for MIL).

[Anonymous]

Maybe it has more to do with your energy level than the weight? She's been there and done that. Why not appreciate that she doesn't want you to make her mistakes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you assume a comment about exercise is about your appearance and not your health?

I agree. You took offense but she may be genuinely concerned about your well being. Did she suffer postpartum depression herself? She may be aware that exercise is something which can help stave this off and she's worried for you. Talk to her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you assume a comment about exercise is about your appearance and not your health?

I agree. You took offense but she may be genuinely concerned about your well being. Did she suffer postpartum depression herself? She may be aware that exercise is something which can help stave this off and she's worried for you. Talk to her.

Eh, no. If she is concerned about your mental health perhaps she could have started the conversation with "are you feeling ok? something seems to be bothering you". In no situation is it ok to just start offering advice that's not asked for. Hiding behind this false thought that if you are looking out for someone's health then you can comment on whatever you want is NOT OKAY. Everyone is healthier if they eat right and get some exercise. Pretty much NO ONE needs their MIL (or any family member) telling them that.

[Anonymous]

My MIL said that to me and I smiled at her and said nothing. I smile at her every time she says something stupid. There is a saying, " Smile and people will wonder what you're up to." Not every comment or question deserves a reply.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would respond, "And you need to mind your own business."

Or, "Your son doesn't mind f*cking me, so I don't know why you're concerned."

The second one will definitely shut her up.

Would either of you actually say these things?? I never would, regardless of how rude she was. The first is too confrontational and the second is just unacceptable. Dh would never forgive me, and my own mom would be horrified at how low-class and crude that is. And yes, I care about that.

Another PP here whi ignored and laughed at my MIL when she said something like this. PP is right. To make an explict comment about your sex life with her son because she said something you did not like IS crude! "MYOB" is also a tricky thing to say to a close family member. These are what I call "point of no return" comments. Once you say something like that, your relationship with MIL is functionally over and your DH won't be too pleased either. Diplomacy and taking the high road would be appropriate for this type of comment. Now if she said "you are turning into a fat ass," that's different. LOL

Exactly. MIL will learn to shut her mouth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would respond, "And you need to mind your own business."

Or, "Your son doesn't mind f*cking me, so I don't know why you're concerned."

The second one will definitely shut her up.

Would either of you actually say these things?? I never would, regardless of how rude she was. The first is too confrontational and the second is just unacceptable. Dh would never forgive me, and my own mom would be horrified at how low-class and crude that is. And yes, I care about that.

Another PP here whi ignored and laughed at my MIL when she said something like this. PP is right. To make an explict comment about your sex life with her son because she said something you did not like IS crude! "MYOB" is also a tricky thing to say to a close family member. These are what I call "point of no return" comments. Once you say something like that, your relationship with MIL is functionally over and your DH won't be too pleased either. Diplomacy and taking the high road would be appropriate for this type of comment. Now if she said "you are turning into a fat ass," that's different. LOL

Exactly. MIL will learn to shut her mouth.

I just think a response like that plays into the drama. To each his own. I hope your DH backs you up.

[Anonymous]

I would respond,"You are right! Thanks so much for watching the kids while I go for a run right now."

Then I would leave for some me time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would respond, "And you need to mind your own business."

Or, "Your son doesn't mind f*cking me, so I don't know why you're concerned."

The second one will definitely shut her up.

Would either of you actually say these things?? I never would, regardless of how rude she was. The first is too confrontational and the second is just unacceptable. Dh would never forgive me, and my own mom would be horrified at how low-class and crude that is. And yes, I care about that.

I'm the second poster you're quoting and yes, I'd say that. Probably not the first time MIL gave the unwanted piece of advice, but by the third time, definitely. I don't take kindly to people overstepping their boundaries concerning my body.

I don't care it's crass. She's way crasser by sticking her nose where it doesn't belong. Whatever takes to shut her up barring physical violence or being the first to call names.