Reasonable bedtime for 6th grader?

[Anonymous]

My youngest is 12. He is in bed reading by 9:30. Lights out at 10. He wakes up (usually on his own) at 6:15. On weekends he is usually up until 11 or 11:30. He'll sleep until 9ish the next day. He is healthy, active and well-rested.

[Anonymous]

NP here.
My dilemma with my 11 year old is that if I put him in bed at 9:30-10 he sleeps through his alarm (seriously, all the way through, and its like trying to wake the dead). If I put him in bed at 10:30-11, he wakes up to his alarm and is much more awake in the morning. He gets up at 7.

Is 9 hours too much for him, or is this some weird sleep cycle thing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our 6th grader claims she cannot fall asleep before 11pm. I feel this is too late, since every morning she struggles to get up at 7:15 and get ready for school. On the weekend, I'm ok with a later bedtime. Do other parents of similarly aged kids enforce an earlier bedtime during the week? And what do you do if your child resists the earlier bedtime? tIA.

The weekend later bedtime is messing things up. It is like having jet lag on a weekly basis. It is easier to go to bed early if the weekend bed time is within an hour of the weekday bedtime.

What time does she have to get up to go to school? I would work back 8-9 hours (depending on her sleep needs) from that and that should be her bedtime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our 6th grader claims she cannot fall asleep before 11pm. I feel this is too late, since every morning she struggles to get up at 7:15 and get ready for school. On the weekend, I'm ok with a later bedtime. Do other parents of similarly aged kids enforce an earlier bedtime during the week? And what do you do if your child resists the earlier bedtime? tIA.

The weekend later bedtime is messing things up. It is like having jet lag on a weekly basis. It is easier to go to bed early if the weekend bed time is within an hour of the weekday bedtime.

What time does she have to get up to go to school? Does she have to get up at 7:15 or can she do things at night and sleep in longer? I would work back 8-9 hours (depending on her sleep needs) from her wake up time and that should be her bedtime.

added the sentence I meant to include.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 7th grader is in bed by 8:30 and asleep NLT 9:00. He's up at 6:00 to walk the dogs. I also have 2 slightly younger kids who are in bed by 8:00. I don't know why people think this is such a big deal. Probably those who think our no-screen time during the week is also too strict. Whatever. It works for us.

Sounds rationale to me! We have a rule that electronics aren't allowed in the bedroom.

Same here. I wonder do all these families with (IMO) super late bedtimes have their kids in lots of sports or other time-intensive after school activities? My 6th grader is home from school no later than 3 pm, does homework, walks the dog, practices his instrument, maybe plays with a friend, has dinner, helps clean up, gets to use the tv/videogames for an hour and is ready for bed by 8:30. Baseball season is starting up and on game nights, bedtime will get pushed to 9 often but overall it really isn't hard to get to bed by 8:30. If you think your kid doesn't need that, fine, but saying it's too strict or too hard to do I just don't get.

Sure, he'd love to stay up until 11pm playing Minecraft if we'd let him but I don't think that's healthy. We would let him stay up until 9pm reading in bed but he doesn't particularly like to read so he usually chooses to just go to sleep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 7th grader is in bed by 8:30 and asleep NLT 9:00. He's up at 6:00 to walk the dogs. I also have 2 slightly younger kids who are in bed by 8:00. I don't know why people think this is such a big deal. Probably those who think our no-screen time during the week is also too strict. Whatever. It works for us.

Sounds rationale to me! We have a rule that electronics aren't allowed in the bedroom.

Same here. I wonder do all these families with (IMO) super late bedtimes have their kids in lots of sports or other time-intensive after school activities? My 6th grader is home from school no later than 3 pm, does homework, walks the dog, practices his instrument, maybe plays with a friend, has dinner, helps clean up, gets to use the tv/videogames for an hour and is ready for bed by 8:30. Baseball season is starting up and on game nights, bedtime will get pushed to 9 often but overall it really isn't hard to get to bed by 8:30. If you think your kid doesn't need that, fine, but saying it's too strict or too hard to do I just don't get.

Sure, he'd love to stay up until 11pm playing Minecraft if we'd let him but I don't think that's healthy. We would let him stay up until 9pm reading in bed but he doesn't particularly like to read so he usually chooses to just go to sleep.

I am a pp with a son that goes to bed at 10:30. Sorry mine doesn't play video games-he is not allowed to play at all during the school week. His phone is downstairs with ours. He is in theater twice a week-he has rehearsal twice a week 6-9 pm, he is on the tennis team-one night a week and Sat afternoons, religious school, Jazz band-Wed nights lesson at 8:30. In the fall he runs track and plays flag football...we just got his progress report..." pleasure to have in class" "excellent effort" positive attitude" "conscientious worker" He is on honor roll. So once again, until we see problem, he can take the lead on his bedtime. We are very proud of him-he is doing great and is a sweet kid. We have two other boys, one of which puts himself to bed at 7:30 on nights he is home (he is 9) and our youngest at age 6 is asleep at 8:30 but we rarely have to tell him to go to bed-he will say "I need a rest" and he is out. Some kids are night owls. My sixth grader is an introvert and I suspect he likes having the house "himself". What works for one family simply doesn't for another. The key is figuring out what works for your particular family and even particular child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 7th grader is in bed by 8:30 and asleep NLT 9:00. He's up at 6:00 to walk the dogs. I also have 2 slightly younger kids who are in bed by 8:00. I don't know why people think this is such a big deal. Probably those who think our no-screen time during the week is also too strict. Whatever. It works for us.

Sounds rationale to me! We have a rule that electronics aren't allowed in the bedroom.

Same here. I wonder do all these families with (IMO) super late bedtimes have their kids in lots of sports or other time-intensive after school activities? My 6th grader is home from school no later than 3 pm, does homework, walks the dog, practices his instrument, maybe plays with a friend, has dinner, helps clean up, gets to use the tv/videogames for an hour and is ready for bed by 8:30. Baseball season is starting up and on game nights, bedtime will get pushed to 9 often but overall it really isn't hard to get to bed by 8:30. If you think your kid doesn't need that, fine, but saying it's too strict or too hard to do I just don't get.

Sure, he'd love to stay up until 11pm playing Minecraft if we'd let him but I don't think that's healthy. We would let him stay up until 9pm reading in bed but he doesn't particularly like to read so he usually chooses to just go to sleep.

I am a pp with a son that goes to bed at 10:30. Sorry mine doesn't play video games-he is not allowed to play at all during the school week. His phone is downstairs with ours. He is in theater twice a week-he has rehearsal twice a week 6-9 pm, he is on the tennis team-one night a week and Sat afternoons, religious school, Jazz band-Wed nights lesson at 8:30. In the fall he runs track and plays flag football...we just got his progress report..." pleasure to have in class" "excellent effort" positive attitude" "conscientious worker" He is on honor roll. So once again, until we see problem, he can take the lead on his bedtime. We are very proud of him-he is doing great and is a sweet kid. We have two other boys, one of which puts himself to bed at 7:30 on nights he is home (he is 9) and our youngest at age 6 is asleep at 8:30 but we rarely have to tell him to go to bed-he will say "I need a rest" and he is out. Some kids are night owls. My sixth grader is an introvert and I suspect he likes having the house "himself". What works for one family simply doesn't for another. The key is figuring out what works for your particular family and even particular child.

In other words, yes, he's in a lot of time-intensive after school activities.

[Anonymous]

Make sure you havr all screens off at least an hour before bedtime and see if that helps. I swear that is the root of my kids' problems. Hate the online homework!!

[Anonymous]

In bed by 9 pm. Lights out 9:30

[Anonymous]

At sixth grade, achieve 9 hours of sleep minimum. So if wakeup is at 7am, SLEEP must start at 10pm, latest. That means light's out, head on the pillow, eyes closed. So for my kid, that means upstairs at 9:30, snuggles (yes, I still do that ), and then I depart.

[Anonymous]

My my DD was in 6th grade, she did not have to be up until 8 AM, as she had to leave for school at 8:50 (if she walked) or 8:40 if she took the bus. School started at 9:15.

So, we had a 10:00 bed time.

The problem was, in 7, making the bus requires her to get up by 6:05, and walking is not an option (it is an 6-8 mile bus ride). But, it is hard to go from a 10:00 bed time to a 9:00..so this year has been more of a struggle. And now, I here the alarm going off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 6th grader has "lights out" at 8:30 and usually falls asleep quickly. He gets up at about 6am so that he can leave the house at 7am. He's been starting to suggest that his bedtime is too early, although I don't think it is since he falls asleep quickly and gets the recommended 9 hrs of sleep. However, if he continues to push on it, our compromise will be that he can read in bed until 9pm.

Lights out at 8:30? Yikes!

Can I ask what a typical afternoon/night routine is so that you can have a 8:30 lights out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 6th grader has "lights out" at 8:30 and usually falls asleep quickly. He gets up at about 6am so that he can leave the house at 7am. He's been starting to suggest that his bedtime is too early, although I don't think it is since he falls asleep quickly and gets the recommended 9 hrs of sleep. However, if he continues to push on it, our compromise will be that he can read in bed until 9pm.

Lights out at 8:30? Yikes!

Can I ask what a typical afternoon/night routine is so that you can have a 8:30 lights out?

NP. I have a 7th grade dd. She wakes anywhere between 6-7am. School starts at 8, she's out the door at 7:30 to meet friends on the walk to school and have time to socialize before the bell.

School ends at 3. She might stay after until 4 or 5 if she's working on a project. If she has sports practice that runs until 5:15. Most days she comes home to decompress. If she stayed after school, she would have completed homework then so it's out of the way. If not, she needs to fit that in. Relax, watch tv, play video games, text friends, whatever until dinner, usually around 6:15. After dinner, unload the dishwasher and do any chores needed. Shower, hang out, them bed at 8. If she has a game, it might be closer to 9 before bedtime.

She's almost always asleep within 15 minutes of lights out, with one exception. If I forget to make sure she turns in her phone before bed, she will be up all night playing games. I can tell the difference in her attitude the next day.

I was just telling DH that I was thinking of keeping the bedtime the same but having lights out at 9 for reading. No phones or ipads, just reading. I don't feel like either of my kids make enough time for reading for pleasure so this might be a good move.

And for the record, most of dd's friends have similar bedtimes. 9 is the latest I'm aware of.

[Anonymous]

I think its kewl lol

[Anonymous]

In my house it's in bed by 9, but he's welcome to read in bed as late as he wants. Usually it's just for 10 or 15 minutes, although occasionally I'll see him up much later finishing a good book. That makes my heart happy.