All the guys I like on match do not want potential matches to have kids.

[Anonymous]

OP here. So this is my day 2 on Match and I am surprised I am getting tons of messages and winks from men whose profiles indicate they do not want to date women with kids... Hmmm! This is really confusing. Of course, I instantly think they just want sex and I am not interested in just getting laid. Dating websites are not necessary for that, right? Anyway, I answered only one guy so far. What is up with winking? I do not even want to see who winked at me as I think it's so childish... I am so new to this and honestly, am nervous about going out with strangers. I guess I will get used to it. Parenthood has definitely made me paranoid and uptight. I am afraid men will sense that.

[Anonymous]

You should not date until your child is not a minor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem is with the websites that allow you to do an advanced, detailed search you are limiting your pool dramatically.

Before online dating, you would notice someone first via physical attraction. You didn't know his income range, his location, his job, how many kids he has, what he does on the weekends, what books he enjoys, what he looks like in a swimsuit, etc.

Online dating is completely backwards.

If anything just go on Tinder. It is like online speed dating. No need to waste time with all the reading and studying people. They look good? Swipe right. Match? Start a conversation. Conversation not going anywhere? Unmatch and move on. Not much time invested.

The problem with tinder is that the majority of people are looking for hook ups (that has been my personal experience).

Those are easy to weed out. Hookups won't talk for very long. They'll want to go on a date very fast.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should not date until your child is not a minor.

LOL

Is that what the church told you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am in a weird position in that I am too old to have another child (39 yrs old) but I have a child already. Even the single dads aren't too interested b/c I have my child with me 24/7. Never married guys want someone younger who can still have kids. Sigh.

Huh? A 43 year old and a 45 year old in my office have both had children. Why would you be too old at 39?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem is with the websites that allow you to do an advanced, detailed search you are limiting your pool dramatically.

Before online dating, you would notice someone first via physical attraction. You didn't know his income range, his location, his job, how many kids he has, what he does on the weekends, what books he enjoys, what he looks like in a swimsuit, etc.

Online dating is completely backwards.

If anything just go on Tinder. It is like online speed dating. No need to waste time with all the reading and studying people. They look good? Swipe right. Match? Start a conversation. Conversation not going anywhere? Unmatch and move on. Not much time invested.

But the thing is, that is usually in person, not by a picture. My DH is a nice looking man but does not photograph well. On the other hand, I know people who look great in photos but meh in pictures - body language, charisma, etc. play a big part in attraction.

Exactly my point. The in person attraction is so important. Basing an opinion off a picture and a profile is lame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a very hot friend who is 29 with a kid and she gets literally 100+ messages a week on okcupid. A good 35-50% are actually messages that looked like the guy read her profile and in her age range.

So i can't believe what the OP is saying is true if she is as hot as she says she is. Guys will definitely not care if she is that hot.

But okcupid is for hookups, match is for relationships.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a very hot friend who is 29 with a kid and she gets literally 100+ messages a week on okcupid. A good 35-50% are actually messages that looked like the guy read her profile and in her age range.

So i can't believe what the OP is saying is true if she is as hot as she says she is. Guys will definitely not care if she is that hot.

I did not mean to boast about my looks. I signed up just yesterday and searched myself to see what is out there. Yes, now I am getting many messages from all kinds of guys, ages 30-50. It is strange to me that guys who say "women with NO kids" express their interest. That just shows that they need one thing only and probably think single moms are desperate. Those in their 50's are nuts to think I would be interested. I still want to have more children, well at least one more. Has your friend met anyone in person from the website?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. So this is my day 2 on Match and I am surprised I am getting tons of messages and winks from men whose profiles indicate they do not want to date women with kids... Hmmm! This is really confusing. Of course, I instantly think they just want sex and I am not interested in just getting laid. Dating websites are not necessary for that, right? Anyway, I answered only one guy so far. What is up with winking? I do not even want to see who winked at me as I think it's so childish... I am so new to this and honestly, am nervous about going out with strangers. I guess I will get used to it. Parenthood has definitely made me paranoid and uptight. I am afraid men will sense that.

Take a deep breath, maybe 2. it's a marathon, not a sprint. You WILL be inundated with winks, messages and so on from tons of men. Just like in real life, there are creeps out there who are using online dating as just another medium through which to try to score with women. Ignore them and don't let it affect you/

Take your time. Honestly, it sounds like you may not be entirely ready to date - so just take it slow and move at whatever pace you feel comfortable doing.

Only respond to men whose profiles connect with you. And as you're only on day 2, take it slow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should not date until your child is not a minor.

OP here. Yes, I thought about it. It does not sound healthy though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. So this is my day 2 on Match and I am surprised I am getting tons of messages and winks from men whose profiles indicate they do not want to date women with kids... Hmmm! This is really confusing. Of course, I instantly think they just want sex and I am not interested in just getting laid. Dating websites are not necessary for that, right? Anyway, I answered only one guy so far. What is up with winking? I do not even want to see who winked at me as I think it's so childish... I am so new to this and honestly, am nervous about going out with strangers. I guess I will get used to it. Parenthood has definitely made me paranoid and uptight. I am afraid men will sense that.

This just in. Any woman on a dating website who does not look like Honey Boo Boo's mother gets tons of messages.

[Anonymous]

LOL. And even Honey Boo Boo's mom has/had a boyfriend

[Anonymous]

Day 2.

How many penis pics have you received?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should not date until your child is not a minor.

LOL

Is that what the church told you?

No, I don't believe in God. The kid needs a mother and father focused on him whether they are together or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should not date until your child is not a minor.

LOL

Is that what the church told you?

No, I don't believe in God. The kid needs a mother and father focused on him whether they are together or not.

So you can't focus on your child and have a life at the same time?