For married couples with children that split the bills 50/50...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But in the case of the diapers and make up - do you separate those transactions so the diapers are charged to the joint account while the makeup comes out of your personal account?

I just don't understand who has time to be moving money back and forth all the time to cover expenses that are all basically "stuff we need."

1) No.

2) there is no moving money around. I don't understand how you don't understand?

[Anonymous]

But there is - you have to move money from "your" account to the "joint" account every time you get paid. I understand that happens automatically, but it still seems like an unnecessary step when you don't really actually divide expenses into mine, yours and ours. If you did, you would pay for the makeup separately, right?

And you're carrying around multiple cards attached to multiple accounts... It just seems like a silly waste of time when in reality everything - income and expense - is "ours."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But there is - you have to move money from "your" account to the "joint" account every time you get paid. I understand that happens automatically, but it still seems like an unnecessary step when you don't really actually divide expenses into mine, yours and ours. If you did, you would pay for the makeup separately, right?

And you're carrying around multiple cards attached to multiple accounts... It just seems like a silly waste of time when in reality everything - income and expense - is "ours."

No, I don't transfer anything. It is all done via direct deposit every payday. No work at all.

If one of us goes to Target to get household items and picks up a few things for himself or herself. we're not splitting that up into separate transactions. It isn't that stringent.

If one of us orders a pair of shoes from Nordstrom or something, we'll just use our personal accounts.

You seem intent on making this more complex than it is.

[Anonymous]

And to me, you're making it more complicated. Everyone needs shoes. Everyone needs toiletries. Why the dance of "mine" vs. "yours"?

[Anonymous]

Do you work?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And to me, you're making it more complicated. Everyone needs shoes. Everyone needs toiletries. Why the dance of "mine" vs. "yours"?

I like it.

[Anonymous]

Dh pays the house, car and utilities and lives off what is left. I pay everything else and save what is left.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ladies stop falling for this. This set up works against you the majority of the time. Most women take a career hit of some sort when having kids. Not to mention if something happens and you need to be a sahm. Don't fall for it.

I am not quite sure what I am "falling" for. For example, I went shopping this past week and spent a little under $1000.00 on clothes for myself. If we had a joint account my husband and I would of had to discuss. The purchases to ensure that the joint account could handle drawing this much down in a day. Frankly, I am an adult and don't feel the need to discuss how much I spend on clothes, hair cuts, or any other personal items. By having money in my own account I can spend what I want, when I want without worrying it will negatively impact the family finances. I am always amazed that people seem so confused by the concept of seperate and joint accounts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies stop falling for this. This set up works against you the majority of the time. Most women take a career hit of some sort when having kids. Not to mention if something happens and you need to be a sahm. Don't fall for it.

I am not quite sure what I am "falling" for. For example, I went shopping this past week and spent a little under $1000.00 on clothes for myself. If we had a joint account my husband and I would of had to discuss. The purchases to ensure that the joint account could handle drawing this much down in a day. Frankly, I am an adult and don't feel the need to discuss how much I spend on clothes, hair cuts, or any other personal items. By having money in my own account I can spend what I want, when I want without worrying it will negatively impact thee family finances. I am always amazed that people seem so confused by the concept of seperate and joint accounts.

I find it interesting you don't view the 1,000 as family money. I view our money as OURS. Not mine and not his. All of it. If I stay home to raise kids I don't want him having a separate account that is HIS. Nor do I want my parents leaving me money that is MINE. We are a team and married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And to me, you're making it more complicated. Everyone needs shoes. Everyone needs toiletries. Why the dance of "mine" vs. "yours"?

Exactly.

[Anonymous]

15:26 here. Just to clarify, my husband and I sit down every December and go through our budget from the bottom up. We have allocations for everything from the daily paper to preschool tuition to the mortgage to everything in between. Included in the budget is an allocation for my husband and me based on our personal needs. That money is what I consider "mine" because it is in my personal account. This approach works for us because it forces us to really discuss our financial priorities and as a result we NEVER argue about money because we are in full agreement about our spending. I work outside the home, but a process like would be even more important to me if I was a stay at home mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:15:26 here. Just to clarify, my husband and I sit down every December and go through our budget from the bottom up. We have allocations for everything from the daily paper to preschool tuition to the mortgage to everything in between. Included in the budget is an allocation for my husband and me based on our personal needs. That money is what I consider "mine" because it is in my personal account. This approach works for us because it forces us to really discuss our financial priorities and as a result we NEVER argue about money because we are in full agreement about our spending. I work outside the home, but a process like would be even more important to me if I was a stay at home mom.

So, you don't have kids, right?

[Anonymous]

Yes, we have two kids (5 and 8). We have line item for preschool, camps, clothes, and daycare. We also have a dog

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But in the case of the diapers and make up - do you separate those transactions so the diapers are charged to the joint account while the makeup comes out of your personal account?

I just don't understand who has time to be moving money back and forth all the time to cover expenses that are all basically "stuff we need."

No it doesn't work that way. I go to Target and I pay for it. DH gets groceries and he pays for it. Big bills come out of the joint. We don't nickel and dime each other. We don't care. It's EASY

[Anonymous]

I find this to be more common in the NE. The women tend to work outside the home and they spend less time and money on grooming.