For married couples with children that split the bills 50/50...

[Anonymous]

I think we could easily close this out by simply agreeing that every couple manages the same big bucket of money by dividing it into however many little buckets work for them. Then they pull from those buckets according to whatever method works for them.

There is no one right way.

[Anonymous]

Not PP, but my DH makes more. Neither of us are big spenders. If DH wants to play a round of golf, thats fine. If I go out to dinner and a movie with my girlfriends thats fine. We don't have a lot of frivilous spending so its a non-issue. We both drive older cars, we both put lots in savings. If he was out spending crazy amounts of money that would be different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get this
No shared saving goals?

We've had this thread 1000 times. And each time it blows people's minds. I'm not sure why.

In our home, we each contribute to a shared savings account, a shared checking account, and keep a small amount of money in personal checking accounts for incidentals, gifts, petty cash, personal grooming, lunches out, whatever. This way, I can keep track of my own personal spending on hair, clothing, etc. and not have to worry about reconciling it with anyone else's activity.

Are the personal monies the same or does the spouse with the larger salary get more?

That's what a co-worker and his wife did. She made more so everything was separate and she kept more play money. Till she up and quit her job one day and suddenly wanted joint finances. True story. He was/is really resentful about that.

[Anonymous]

Two answers -

My husband and I make roughly the same amount of money, so paying equally into the joint account has never been an issue.

We contribute more to the joint account each month than we know we'll spend. It just makes us more comfortable to have a cushion. If there are big additional expenses (adding in daycare, buying a new house with a bigger mortgage, etc.), we increase our contribution to cover that.

If there are really big, one-time joint expenses (travel, Christmas gifts, etc.) then one of us pays with a credit card and we reimburse each other.

Like PPs have said, we always thought we would combine once we had a kid, but we just... didn't. It works for us, so no issue.

[Anonymous]

No kids, but....

We have separate checking and savings accounts, separate "play" brokerage accounts, separate credit cards, a shared savings account, a shared checking account, a shared brokerage account, and shared credit cards (in one name, but with two cards and considered the "joint" card).

We put the same amount of money into the shared checking account each month, which should be enough to cover our expenses, including all charges on the joint credit card. Groceries, travel, dining out, joint activities all go on this card.

If we have money building up in the shared checking account, we move it to the shared saving account. If there's a lot, we may move some to the brokerage account and buy some ETFs.

My monthly deposit into the shared checking account is about 68% of my take-home pay. So my remaining 22% is mine, to save, spend, invest, or sometimes put toward large expenses that we need to pay.

There's no "splitting of the bills"--they are paid out of the joint checking account.

And yet somehow despite being heathens who haven't merged all our finances, we are happy and very very well off.

[Anonymous]

^^ (ahem, remaining 32% of take home pay)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No kids, but....

We have separate checking and savings accounts, separate "play" brokerage accounts, separate credit cards, a shared savings account, a shared checking account, a shared brokerage account, and shared credit cards (in one name, but with two cards and considered the "joint" card).

We put the same amount of money into the shared checking account each month, which should be enough to cover our expenses, including all charges on the joint credit card. Groceries, travel, dining out, joint activities all go on this card.

If we have money building up in the shared checking account, we move it to the shared saving account. If there's a lot, we may move some to the brokerage account and buy some ETFs.

My monthly deposit into the shared checking account is about 68% of my take-home pay. So my remaining 22% is mine, to save, spend, invest, or sometimes put toward large expenses that we need to pay.

There's no "splitting of the bills"--they are paid out of the joint checking account.

And yet somehow despite being heathens who haven't merged all our finances, we are happy and very very well off.

No kids, but..

[Anonymous]

I'm shocked people do this. So bizarre.

[Anonymous]

We keep our separate accounts and pay for expenses out of them roughly 50/50. Don't worry about little things like field trips. There is a joint account, but it's easier to just pay from our own accounts. We're not anal about it being down to the penny, or dollar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm shocked people do this. So bizarre.

I understand. We do it because we married and had kids quite late in life, after we each had accumulated considerable assets. Just seemed the easiest thing to do rather than retitle properties, unwind investments, just for the sake of having it all jointly. Emphasis was on easy, and not on what most people do.

[Anonymous]

I can't imagine having to shuffle income from bank account A to bank accounts B, C and D every month to make sure bills are covered, but I know many DCUMers do it. We have one account and one credit card, and everything goes into it, onto it and comes out of it. But we've been together since we were in our 20s and dirt poor, so we just naturally view everything we have as joint.

I understand how people in second or late marriages might be more inclined to "hold onto what's mine." I know my mother has never given her second husband access to her bank account, and I imagine that's because things didn't go so well the first time around.

[Anonymous]

I think the troubles with this sort of divided accounting occur when parents don't make equal amounts and/or when one parent spends a lot more than the other.

Once you have kids and all the expenses that come with it, having divided accounts becomes complicated. What if you buy diapers along with some make up for on amazon? Do you have to divide the bill?

Personally, I would make sure that each parent has maxed out retirement contributions, but then put the rest in joint accounts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm shocked people do this. So bizarre.

trust issUes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm shocked people do this. So bizarre.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the troubles with this sort of divided accounting occur when parents don't make equal amounts and/or when one parent spends a lot more than the other.

Once you have kids and all the expenses that come with it, having divided accounts becomes complicated. What if you buy diapers along with some make up for on amazon? Do you have to divide the bill?

Personally, I would make sure that each parent has maxed out retirement contributions, but then put the rest in joint accounts.

No. That comes from the joint accounts. Did you actually read the thread?