How have you handled kid dumping

[Anonymous]

"right words"

It's not about words, it's about resolve. You have to put your big-girl pants on and be willing to deal with her crabbiness and anger.

And if not directly ~ why are you opening the door? Or answering your phone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I seriously doubt most people IRL live with such cold feelings about their family members. At least I hope that's true. Seriously, glad I am not part of your families. I am the PP who is raising my kids to need each other and take care of each other -- the exact opposite of the way most PPs on this thread view family.

There is helping each other, and there is taking advantage. OP's sister is clearly over the line.

+1

I'm another one who had family take advantage. When it came to returning the help after giving loads of free childcare (and then some), coincidentally my sister ALWAYS had something else come up, or had to cancel, or forgot, or something more important to do - than giving me a little back.

I'm all for family helping each other. But it's gotta go both ways. I don't understand how one can take advantage of family, and feel ok with themselves.

I took care of my sib's DC regularly when she was going through a divorce and then going back to school. I didn't have kids then. Now that I have kids of my own, i am estranged from my family and get no help whatsoever. I still feel it's important to help family even though I got nothing in return, and that's how I'm raising my kids. That's what I want for them when they grow up and I am gone.

[Anonymous]

I'm all for helping out family.

But barring situations involving the hospitals or funerals it is not OK to ask you to call in favors with your boss, especially on short notice.

[Anonymous]

When I want help from a family member, I call them or write an email and ask for help..for a specific day and time. I am very close to my family and I would never dream of just dropping my kid off at a moment's notice. this is just common decency. I don't pay my family for babysitting though I gladly would if they could use a little bit of money. But do make sure to thank them, make them a meal in return or do some other favor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I seriously doubt most people IRL live with such cold feelings about their family members. At least I hope that's true. Seriously, glad I am not part of your families. I am the PP who is raising my kids to need each other and take care of each other -- the exact opposite of the way most PPs on this thread view family.

There is helping each other, and there is taking advantage. OP's sister is clearly over the line.

+1

I'm another one who had family take advantage. When it came to returning the help after giving loads of free childcare (and then some), coincidentally my sister ALWAYS had something else come up, or had to cancel, or forgot, or something more important to do - than giving me a little back.

I'm all for family helping each other. But it's gotta go both ways. I don't understand how one can take advantage of family, and feel ok with themselves.

I took care of my sib's DC regularly when she was going through a divorce and then going back to school. I didn't have kids then. Now that I have kids of my own, i am estranged from my family and get no help whatsoever. I still feel it's important to help family even though I got nothing in return, and that's how I'm raising my kids. That's what I want for them when they grow up and I am gone.

I'm sorry that your family isn't there for you, OP. My mother and father never had family around to help. We grew up a tight-knit group. Sadly, one of us married a selfish person and that sib has used the rest of us for childcare yet rarely been there for us in return. It has fractured the family. Hope your children have a better experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I seriously doubt most people IRL live with such cold feelings about their family members. At least I hope that's true. Seriously, glad I am not part of your families. I am the PP who is raising my kids to need each other and take care of each other -- the exact opposite of the way most PPs on this thread view family.

There is helping each other, and there is taking advantage. OP's sister is clearly over the line.

+1

I'm another one who had family take advantage. When it came to returning the help after giving loads of free childcare (and then some), coincidentally my sister ALWAYS had something else come up, or had to cancel, or forgot, or something more important to do - than giving me a little back.

I'm all for family helping each other. But it's gotta go both ways. I don't understand how one can take advantage of family, and feel ok with themselves.

I took care of my sib's DC regularly when she was going through a divorce and then going back to school. I didn't have kids then. Now that I have kids of my own, i am estranged from my family and get no help whatsoever. I still feel it's important to help family even though I got nothing in return, and that's how I'm raising my kids. That's what I want for them when they grow up and I am gone.

I'm sorry that your family isn't there for you, OP. My mother and father never had family around to help. We grew up a tight-knit group. Sadly, one of us married a selfish person and that sib has used the rest of us for childcare yet rarely been there for us in return. It has fractured the family. Hope your children have a better experience.