Did you drive you Middle Schooler in to school today?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's something we are grateful we learned from other experienced parents of teens: whenever teens call and say "mom/dad, can you please come pick me up?" we agree that we will. Sure, it's intended for when teens find themselves in more precarious situations, but I would have encouraged you to say "yes" to their request from the coffee shop. (Weren't they admitting they made a mistake?) Under no circumstances would I respond: "I'm gonna call the truant officer on you." WTH??

+1. Parent of 4 teens here. I would urge OP to look at the big picture. In essence, what you are telling them is "You made a bad decision - YOU deal with it." No problem there - generally, I am a "life lesson and "tough love" kind of girl. But you need to emphasize to them that it was good that they called you and that was a good decision after a bad one. Here's why. Your kids are going to want to hang out and go to parties and such. They may even make bad decisions - all teens do. But you still want them to call you if they get in over their heads. For example, your DD says she is spending a night at a friend's. They sneak out and go to a party. Things get out of hand and DD feels unsafe or just that she needs to get the hell out of there. You want her to feel that she can call you....right? IMO, there was no real problem with how OP handled this specific situation (although I would have driven them had I been home). However, I do think that she needs to reinforce the notion that they should call if they find themselves in a difficult situation that they do not feel they can handle.

OP here. Very good points in your post--thanks for the perspective. I do want them to always feel that they can call after a bad decision. I'll reinforce this with them when they get home. Thanks everyone--for not making me feel like an even worse parent than I did at that moment. This stuff is complicated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i am with you, dress for the weather and you will be fine. How many of you had your parnets drive you to the metro today?

if they are smart enough to go inside a coffeee shop and call home they are smart enough to know how to dress for the weather and get to school on time.

+1

Another +1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No wonder there's a bunch of sick kids in my son's school. It's because of lazy parents like yourself who want to teach their kids an important life lesson. If you don't want to drive them, make sure they are properly dressed.

Yeah, read the post, I offered them clothing that would allow them to trek through a rain forest. I should own LL Bean and Hard Mountain Wear stock.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've never ever seen a tween/teen wear rainboots to school. Are you asking for them to be bullied? Thinking that outta toughen them up?

What an odd thing to say My 7th grader is wearing her bright yellow Hunter wellies.

[Anonymous]

You realize they'll have the air on at school right? Wet pants and feet with air conditioning is a great way to get sick. Just take them some clothes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've never ever seen a tween/teen wear rainboots to school. Are you asking for them to be bullied? Thinking that outta toughen them up?

Plenty of girls at Deal wear Wellies™ on a day like this--it's fine. And the boys have those ridiculous Timberlake Mt. Everest Assault boots which are highly coveted, according to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You realize they'll have the air on at school right? Wet pants and feet with air conditioning is a great way to get sick. Just take them some clothes.

You realize that viruses cause colds, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You realize they'll have the air on at school right? Wet pants and feet with air conditioning is a great way to get sick. Just take them some clothes.

YOU DON'T GET SICK FROM HAVING WET PANTS AND FEET IN AIR CONDITIONING.

I apologize for yelling, but really, it's the 21st century. The germ theory of disease has been around for at least 100 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You realize they'll have the air on at school right? Wet pants and feet with air conditioning is a great way to get sick. Just take them some clothes.

YOU DON'T GET SICK FROM HAVING WET PANTS AND FEET IN AIR CONDITIONING.

I apologize for yelling, but really, it's the 21st century. The germ theory of disease has been around for at least 100 years.

But it can make you more susceptible to catching a cold.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for your input here. I am resisting my intense urge to bring them dry pants to school. I feel like such a flip flopper on that. I am constantly feeling guilty about such things--but I really have given them all the tools they need for school today--I refuse to raise entitled little baby adults.

so what if you flip flop? you could say "you know what? that was a mistake, i am sorry, it was raining really hard". my kids seem to really respect when i admit and apologize for a mistake. and it is your job to take care of them. they may very well forget when they had to walk in the rain but they wont forget when you briught them dry clothes and admitted a bad call.

But maybe OP doesn't think it was a mistake to make them walk, despite feeling guilty about the wet pants.

(I don't think it was a mistake.)

OP here--I really, really don't think it was a mistake not to drive them--but I did feel guilty that they would be slopping around school in wet pants--which as it turns out "reports of my children having virtually drowned while walking in have been greatly exaggerated".

[Anonymous]

"This stuff is complicated."

No, it's not.

[Anonymous]

I would have driven my kids. I would have brought them warm clothes. It would not have damaged them. But I think everyone is making too much of this. What OP did was fine. Handling this differently would have also been fine. If every there was an example of how good parents can handle things differently, this is it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No wonder there's a bunch of sick kids in my son's school. It's because of lazy parents like yourself who want to teach their kids an important life lesson. If you don't want to drive them, make sure they are properly dressed.

you don't get sick from the weather you get sick from germs.

[Anonymous]

you do know that many of the kids at school are walking around soaking wet to get attention. they think it is cool and fun

look at me folks my hair is wet and messy my pants are wet but i am cool

[Anonymous]

I would have driven them, but I understand why you wouldn't. Personally, however, I think you were being harsh. It was pretty crappy outside, and it's a half a mile. That's a long time to be walking in this crappy weather, when it would have taken you at most 10 minutes to get them there.