How to Tell my Mom to Stop Sending my DS Money

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are adults. Why does this bother you so much? It seems really controlling.

+1

You are correct that there isn't anything this mom can do, but I'm sure she is partly bothered because she is trying to teach her son life skills, which include living within his means, and he is clearly living better than he should. The grandmother is potentially helping cultivate a young man who can't manage for himself once he is finished with school.

The conversation I would have with grandma is about how she can spoil him without frittering the money away.... maybe help pay for a trip abroad after college? maybe put it toward grad school? a down payment on a house... moving costs.... allowing him to take a great unpaid internship next summer.... rather than on beer, food, and football tickets.

At the bare minimum if you can get her to switch to a gift card, that would be great.

I have a bit of a similar issue (my mom insists on giving me money) and I've tried to say "You know, I could really use stamps instead" but then I get stamps AND money. So I don't recommend suggesting other gifts or it may get compounded. But a gift card to (name a place and say it's DS's favorite place) might transfer over well.

[Anonymous]

A person can budget no matter their resources. OP your son is learning to budget with that gift money in the equation. You are so lucky! This is not a problem. It's a gift!

[Anonymous]

Poor Grandma! Leave that nice lady alone, jeeze!

Yes, it does sound as if OP is ridiculously controlling. I can only imagine what a terror she was when the poor kid was growing up at home.

Get a grip, Mom and MYOB. Don't you have a life of your own to live?