Strange contacts in phone of teenager

[Anonymous]

OP, the base case for our kids' cell phone, and their usage of them, is simple: we the parents pay for the phone. It is OURS. We allow them to use these phones. Thus we give them enough leash to lose phone by improper use.

Honestly, who CARES what your DD thinks if she finds out you snooped-tis your job! Ex: if he/she is texting nude photos to one another, and any of them are under 18, BANG! If the authorities see this and discover it, and trace the image to your daughter's phone, does your vow to NOT snoop hold water? Who gets in trouble first? YOU DO!!!! Wake up!
Confront her - call the fucking number. Take action!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:i hope you know that this will go down on your permanent record!

Oh yeah? Well don't get so distressed. Did I happen to mention I'm impressed?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i hope you know that this will go down on your permanent record!

Oh yeah? Well don't get so distressed. Did I happen to mention I'm impressed?

Crap, that song's going to be in my head for the REST OF THE DAY! ARRRGGG!!!

[Anonymous]

What are you going to do, OP?

[Anonymous]

OP, I would confront based on his red eyes, lethargy, etc. Ask to see his phone. Ask about Jamaican Jerry. Make him take a pee test.

I am all for smoking legal pot but not for getting in trouble with the law and ruining your future. Act now.

[Anonymous]

Do not drug test your kid. What a way to break trust and make him hate you. You're not the military. Talk to him.

[Anonymous]

Because a white child could never have a Jamaican friend, named jerry...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I would confront based on his red eyes, lethargy, etc. Ask to see his phone. Ask about Jamaican Jerry. Make him take a pee test.

I am all for smoking legal pot but not for getting in trouble with the law and ruining your future. Act now.

OP, I absolutely would confront your child and/or test. We didn't check our child's phone until after he was caught with drugs, and it was all there, in cryptic texts. We were able to figure out who the dealer at his school was and take action. You have the clues right there, now act on them!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 10th grade son had been acting strange a few days ago, something DH and I both noticed. He has been acting kind of tired or lethargic. Being that age, I'm concerned about drugs and alcohol and what not so I checked his phone. He has a contact in there named "Jamaican Jerry" who I noticed that he called a few days ago as well. We've gone through the whole yearbook of his school and there is no kid named Jerry or anything similar. I don't want to ask him who Jamaican Jerry is because I would be admitting that I searched through his phone, but what do you make of this?

Any help appreciated

Guess you shouldn't have done it then, huh?

Unless you've done an exceptionally terrible job of raising your child, he can smoke a few joints and still be a good person. Calm down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you seem to be more concerned about making your son mad and upset that you went through his phone than you are about the fact he is very possibly using drugs.

Please get over that. Now. If you have given your son the idea that he has privacy regarding his phone -- that was a mistake, but it's too late to fix; he needs to know now that he does not have that privacy. The lethargy etc. alone, even if you had not found "Jerry" in the phone, should have been a red flag indicating you should talk to you son. Why are you so reluctant to be the parent here? Why reluctant to offend your son? Is it because you fear he'll clam up if he knows you've gone through his phone, or because you fear he'll lash out--? Are you possibly physically afraid of him somehow, or afraid that a talk will end up confirming that he's using drugs? These questions aren't meant to be snarky, they're very real -- please think about why you are so reluctant to confront him.

Then script out how you AND dad plan to address this when you do talk to him. Don't wing it or you could get upset or angry or both and set him off either to go ballistic (not useful) or to stop talking (not useful) or to leave (lease useful of all).

Think ahead about what you and dad will say, what you will ask, and how you plan to react if he admits it, as well as how you plan to react if he denies it.

Meanwhile, yeah, I'd call "Jerry's" number but not from your home, cell or work phone or from your son's phone either.

+1000

[Anonymous]

There is NOTHING wrong with a parent going through a child's phone.

That is your responsibility. Your child is not an adult.

It is your responsibility to provide supervision, guidance, and structure for your child. You are supervising your child's phone use. You have nothing to apologize for. That is your freaking JOB as a parent.

Take down the number, call it, pretend to be someone looking for weed, and see what happens. Then confront your son. This is NOT to be taken lightly.

[Anonymous]

PP, bravo!

[Anonymous]

Call Jamaica jerry for a 20 sack see what happens

[Anonymous]

Not the OP, but recently had some similar strange things going on that made me suspect my DS. I thought I was going nuts so I finally searched room and unfortunately confirmed what I suspected.

[Anonymous]

OP - what I forgot to say above was I was afraid to confront without proof. If you are suspicious then they probably are doing it.