newly single dad in NW DC, how to meet women for casual or enduring relationship?

[Anonymous]

*arg! Damn quote function.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To the PP who said she's not have much luck striking up conversations -- beware that some insecure wives out there are going to think you're trying to pick up their husbands. Being friendly ans striking up conversations is all it takes. If I get that jealous vibe, I'm out of there. I'm a friendly, talkative person -- always. To married men, single men and all of the women. I need female friends too. It can be lonely as a single mom.

Anyway, I have a 2-3 good couple friends. Women who know I'm not out to get their husbands and husbands who just present a different perspective socially. I go out with them as the third wheel sometimes. No biggie.

I've met most of the men I've dated online. When I'm at kid activities, I'm focused on the kids and it's hard to tell someone's situation. I know a lot of the other parents don't realize we're divorced unless it comes up.

But wouldn't they be right in thinking you are trying to pick up their husbands given that you are suggesting meeting people to date at a park, so your reason for "striking up conversations" is to meet people to date?

I'm not saying don't be chatty at the park, but you can't on the one hand flat out admit that you try to meet people to date at the playground and then accuse wives of suspecting you're hitting on men at the park!

If people didn't try to date at the park, it would be a nonissue. And then no one would have to be suspicious of casual chatting.

A kid's playground really shouldn't be seen as a place to find dates. It creates unnecessary tension and, yes, suspicion.

Good Lord, PP. No one is suggesting rolling up to the playground in a sheath dress and Louboutin platforms. And not all single people who talk to other single people are interesting in those particular people. But most single parents want to meet other single parents. And where do parents with kids meet other parents with kids? In places where parents with kids hang out. You know, common interests, etc. Kind of like when you met your DH, remember? Again, a wedding ring is a great way to steer clear of any potential lurking mates. We single parents have plenty of drama in our lives...we don't need any more, thanks.

That's me above. Sorry, I have never gone to the park with the intention of trying to meet a date. When my kids were younger, I couldn't finish a sentence at the park and was busy watching them. Now they do other stuff outside. No more Sat. a.m. park visits b/c everyone was up and we had no place else to go. I was simply saying, as soon as I was "newly single," there were times when I sensed the wives were thinking, öf course, now she's after my DH!" The cliche of a divorced woman. I am friendly and being divorced can be lonely. If I get someone with common interests to talk to, I'm likely to strike up conversation for the sake of...conversation! There are just as many couple friends who took me under their wing and socialized with me when they knew I had no plans. And for the record, a DH is not someone I am looking to date. No thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To the PP who said she's not have much luck striking up conversations -- beware that some insecure wives out there are going to think you're trying to pick up their husbands. Being friendly ans striking up conversations is all it takes. If I get that jealous vibe, I'm out of there. I'm a friendly, talkative person -- always. To married men, single men and all of the women. I need female friends too. It can be lonely as a single mom.

Anyway, I have a 2-3 good couple friends. Women who know I'm not out to get their husbands and husbands who just present a different perspective socially. I go out with them as the third wheel sometimes. No biggie.

I've met most of the men I've dated online. When I'm at kid activities, I'm focused on the kids and it's hard to tell someone's situation. I know a lot of the other parents don't realize we're divorced unless it comes up.

Not sure how the PP thinks this is her newly ex H." There are a lot of them out there!

But wouldn't they be right in thinking you are trying to pick up their husbands given that you are suggesting meeting people to date at a park, so your reason for "striking up conversations" is to meet people to date?



I'm not saying don't be chatty at the park, but you can't on the one hand flat out admit that you try to meet people to date at the playground and then accuse wives of suspecting you're hitting on men at the park!

If people didn't try to date at the park, it would be a nonissue. And then no one would have to be suspicious of casual chatting.

A kid's playground really shouldn't be seen as a place to find dates. It creates unnecessary tension and, yes, suspicion.

Nobody wants to pick up your husband. Many single parents are always at family friendly functions because their kids are always with them. It wouldn't be appropriate to take their toddlers to the hookah bar, so it would be nice for the single men with kids to be more obvious at the park. Keep in mind, some single moms are single because of their exes and other women not respecting their marriages and have zero desire to do the same. Not to mention, someone else's husband is just not hot. We want our own toys to play with, thank you very much.

This irritates me because I usually find that its some of the married men that you have to watch out for. I am one of a very small pool of single moms in a community of married folks and I have had numerous married men come on to me (and very strongly) to which I refuse. There is nothing sexy about a man disrespecting the woman he made vows to. My POV is any man who disrespects his mother, his wife, or his kids is someone you should run away from. Yet, there are married women (fortunately, a small group) who give me the stank eye or joke about me "staying out of trouble" if I'm talking to a married guy. The women I see screwing married men are all married women, yet wives tend to be blind to that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:serious question - are there playgrounds or parks in n. arlington with more single moms than others? I never seem to run into single moms when I take my DD out.

admittedly, like another PP, I'm focused on my DD but even just casually noticing folks around, it seems like only married folks where we usually hang out.

I jog Roosevelt island every weekend. I run into folks (single type) at the tot lot in front of Barnes and Noble but there are way better parks for my Kid So it's not a routine. I will say the other parks tend to be nanny heavy during the week day and the wifed moms have big ole rings on and I do not.
Just start up a convo. If she's married and hopefully not interested she probably has a friend or sister.