High school recommendations from our k-8 school and how should I feel about?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reality is, there aren't enough spots at T1 schools for everyone going into high schools. Why are people shocked when their kids don't get into a T1 school? And justifying their belief that they should because they've paid XXX amount of dollars...ummmm almost everyone who is around paid the same amount, and has the same belief so, why do you think your money is worth more or your child is somehow the one who should get into T1? Every parent at say St. B's wants their kid to go T1, and thought that their son getting into St. B's would ensure their top high school choice but that's impossible when people insist that only going to a list of about 5 schools will mean success. Kids will have to go to "lesser" schools, and you are not getting scammed, or cheated, if that's your kid. I get being disappointed because what you had envisioned will not pan out, but that probably wouldn't have happened at Summit High School in NJ either because you have to start tracking in the top 10% of the class in literally middle school to even be allowed to take honors and APs. Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs. Your kid isn't going to fail at life because they "only" got into Fieldston or Grace or Dwight.

All of this right here!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs.

Is this still true? I thought they had switched to mostly grade-based admissions for QE courses. You can go directly from Precalculus to BC, they don't require you to take AB first like some schools, so the 4-year sequence of Geometry -> Algebra II -> Precalculus -> BC Calculus is totally doable as long as you did Regents Algebra in 8th.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reality is, there aren't enough spots at T1 schools for everyone going into high schools. Why are people shocked when their kids don't get into a T1 school? And justifying their belief that they should because they've paid XXX amount of dollars...ummmm almost everyone who is around paid the same amount, and has the same belief so, why do you think your money is worth more or your child is somehow the one who should get into T1? Every parent at say St. B's wants their kid to go T1, and thought that their son getting into St. B's would ensure their top high school choice but that's impossible when people insist that only going to a list of about 5 schools will mean success. Kids will have to go to "lesser" schools, and you are not getting scammed, or cheated, if that's your kid. I get being disappointed because what you had envisioned will not pan out, but that probably wouldn't have happened at Summit High School in NJ either because you have to start tracking in the top 10% of the class in literally middle school to even be allowed to take honors and APs. Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs. Your kid isn't going to fail at life because they "only" got into Fieldston or Grace or Dwight.

OP isn’t upset her kid isn’t going to a TT. She’s upset that she wasn’t warned her student was on track for a mediocre school despite good grades and scores. She was misled.

Being top 10% at summit is much easier than being median at St Bs. No one at summit would get into Trinity, even if the whole class applied.

[Anonymous]

What shall uptown co ed are we talking about k-8? Bank street? St Hilda and st Hugh’s? Cathedral?

[Anonymous]

*small

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs.

Is this still true? I thought they had switched to mostly grade-based admissions for QE courses. You can go directly from Precalculus to BC, they don't require you to take AB first like some schools, so the 4-year sequence of Geometry -> Algebra II -> Precalculus -> BC Calculus is totally doable as long as you did Regents Algebra in 8th.

I think there are ways to catch up, but I get the point that the poster was making...the idea that your child deserves to be in the top just by virtue of going to a certain school for elementary is not realistic. Life doesn't work that way yet on this board the entitlement is real, and people tend to say "I'd rather move to a good public school" or, "my child will just go to BT" and they assume that the same issues of their child not being in the top tier won't persist, and if they just move to public school their kid will get into a top Ivy. That presumption is not correct.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs.

Is this still true? I thought they had switched to mostly grade-based admissions for QE courses. You can go directly from Precalculus to BC, they don't require you to take AB first like some schools, so the 4-year sequence of Geometry -> Algebra II -> Precalculus -> BC Calculus is totally doable as long as you did Regents Algebra in 8th.

I think there are ways to catch up, but I get the point that the poster was making...the idea that your child deserves to be in the top just by virtue of going to a certain school for elementary is not realistic. Life doesn't work that way yet on this board the entitlement is real, and people tend to say "I'd rather move to a good public school" or, "my child will just go to BT" and they assume that the same issues of their child not being in the top tier won't persist, and if they just move to public school their kid will get into a top Ivy. That presumption is not correct.

Her kid wasn’t just at a decent K-8. The student scored well enough on the ISEE and in his or her grades to go to a TT. Then the K-8 is telling her not to apply.

Where do median students at Buckley and St Bs and St David’s go? Genuinely curious what all that tuition and stress gets you. You know it’s not HM or Collegiate.

[Anonymous]

I think there are ways to catch up, but I get the point that the poster was making...the idea that your child deserves to be in the top just by virtue of going to a certain school for elementary is not realistic. Life doesn't work that way yet on this board the entitlement is real, and people tend to say "I'd rather move to a good public school" or, "my child will just go to BT" and they assume that the same issues of their child not being in the top tier won't persist, and if they just move to public school their kid will get into a top Ivy. That presumption is not correct.

I think the issue is money. If the kid isn't going to be in the top tier of students don't spend 300k on high school. I've had to grapple with this question this year of do I really want to spend that kind of money in the current world we're living in and then in 4 years my kid gets into BU or Wesleyan where we will also probably be paying full tuition. Those or both great schools but you don't need to have spent the money at Packer or FS to get in. Kids get into great colleges from all sorts of schools. The SHSHAT schools are a hard sell because with the exception of Lehman and BK Latin they are all huge. I think you have to be a really excellent, disciplined and self-directed student to thrive at Stuy, BxSc or BT.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs.

Is this still true? I thought they had switched to mostly grade-based admissions for QE courses. You can go directly from Precalculus to BC, they don't require you to take AB first like some schools, so the 4-year sequence of Geometry -> Algebra II -> Precalculus -> BC Calculus is totally doable as long as you did Regents Algebra in 8th.

I think there are ways to catch up, but I get the point that the poster was making...the idea that your child deserves to be in the top just by virtue of going to a certain school for elementary is not realistic. Life doesn't work that way yet on this board the entitlement is real, and people tend to say "I'd rather move to a good public school" or, "my child will just go to BT" and they assume that the same issues of their child not being in the top tier won't persist, and if they just move to public school their kid will get into a top Ivy. That presumption is not correct.

Her kid wasn’t just at a decent K-8. The student scored well enough on the ISEE and in his or her grades to go to a TT. Then the K-8 is telling her not to apply.

Where do median students at Buckley and St Bs and St David’s go? Genuinely curious what all that tuition and stress gets you. You know it’s not HM or Collegiate.

No one knows.

What happens if her kid got in HM from K? Would her kid stand out at HM?
What happens if her kid did get in HM 9th grade? Would her kid get in an ivy eventually?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs.

Is this still true? I thought they had switched to mostly grade-based admissions for QE courses. You can go directly from Precalculus to BC, they don't require you to take AB first like some schools, so the 4-year sequence of Geometry -> Algebra II -> Precalculus -> BC Calculus is totally doable as long as you did Regents Algebra in 8th.

I think there are ways to catch up, but I get the point that the poster was making...the idea that your child deserves to be in the top just by virtue of going to a certain school for elementary is not realistic. Life doesn't work that way yet on this board the entitlement is real, and people tend to say "I'd rather move to a good public school" or, "my child will just go to BT" and they assume that the same issues of their child not being in the top tier won't persist, and if they just move to public school their kid will get into a top Ivy. That presumption is not correct.

Her kid wasn’t just at a decent K-8. The student scored well enough on the ISEE and in his or her grades to go to a TT. Then the K-8 is telling her not to apply.

Where do median students at Buckley and St Bs and St David’s go? Genuinely curious what all that tuition and stress gets you. You know it’s not HM or Collegiate.

No one knows.

What happens if her kid got in HM from K? Would her kid stand out at HM?
What happens if her kid did get in HM 9th grade? Would her kid get in an ivy eventually?

Someone here should know where median students at K-8s people strive to get in are going.

Those what ifs aren’t the issue. The issue is performing well on every metric for years, paying a fortune, and then being told a 3T school is the best option. That’s a failure of communication

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reality is, there aren't enough spots at T1 schools for everyone going into high schools. Why are people shocked when their kids don't get into a T1 school? And justifying their belief that they should because they've paid XXX amount of dollars...ummmm almost everyone who is around paid the same amount, and has the same belief so, why do you think your money is worth more or your child is somehow the one who should get into T1? Every parent at say St. B's wants their kid to go T1, and thought that their son getting into St. B's would ensure their top high school choice but that's impossible when people insist that only going to a list of about 5 schools will mean success. Kids will have to go to "lesser" schools, and you are not getting scammed, or cheated, if that's your kid. I get being disappointed because what you had envisioned will not pan out, but that probably wouldn't have happened at Summit High School in NJ either because you have to start tracking in the top 10% of the class in literally middle school to even be allowed to take honors and APs. Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs. Your kid isn't going to fail at life because they "only" got into Fieldston or Grace or Dwight.

OP isn’t upset her kid isn’t going to a TT. She’s upset that she wasn’t warned her student was on track for a mediocre school despite good grades and scores. She was misled.

Being top 10% at summit is much easier than being median at St Bs. No one at summit would get into Trinity, even if the whole class applied.

Completely wrong. Summit (and Millburn, and others) is an excellent school and top kids there are as good as any kid in America. Since it is public it takes everyone so the "average" kid there is definitely lower, but the top are the top. I graduated from a similar school, went to a top undergrad and grad, and generally outpaced most of the NYC private school and boarding school kids. Probably the smartest kids I knew in college went to random public schools in flyover country.

This narrowmindedness is why the rest of America hates New Yorkers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reality is, there aren't enough spots at T1 schools for everyone going into high schools. Why are people shocked when their kids don't get into a T1 school? And justifying their belief that they should because they've paid XXX amount of dollars...ummmm almost everyone who is around paid the same amount, and has the same belief so, why do you think your money is worth more or your child is somehow the one who should get into T1? Every parent at say St. B's wants their kid to go T1, and thought that their son getting into St. B's would ensure their top high school choice but that's impossible when people insist that only going to a list of about 5 schools will mean success. Kids will have to go to "lesser" schools, and you are not getting scammed, or cheated, if that's your kid. I get being disappointed because what you had envisioned will not pan out, but that probably wouldn't have happened at Summit High School in NJ either because you have to start tracking in the top 10% of the class in literally middle school to even be allowed to take honors and APs. Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs. Your kid isn't going to fail at life because they "only" got into Fieldston or Grace or Dwight.

OP isn’t upset her kid isn’t going to a TT. She’s upset that she wasn’t warned her student was on track for a mediocre school despite good grades and scores. She was misled.



Being top 10% at summit is much easier than being median at St Bs. No one at summit would get into Trinity, even if the whole class applied.

Completely wrong. Summit (and Millburn, and others) is an excellent school and top kids there are as good as any kid in America. Since it is public it takes everyone so the "average" kid there is definitely lower, but the top are the top. I graduated from a similar school, went to a top undergrad and grad, and generally outpaced most of the NYC private school and boarding school kids. Probably the smartest kids I knew in college went to random public schools in flyover country.

This narrowmindedness is why the rest of America hates New Yorkers.

This. Drives me nuts. The top at Milburn are even more cut throat than the TT NYC private I went to because they actually have to do even more to stand out. And the parents...omg. We left to come back to the city because I couldn't bear the thought of having to deal with it for middle and high school. I'll take a NYC private school T2 every time if offered the choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs.

Is this still true? I thought they had switched to mostly grade-based admissions for QE courses. You can go directly from Precalculus to BC, they don't require you to take AB first like some schools, so the 4-year sequence of Geometry -> Algebra II -> Precalculus -> BC Calculus is totally doable as long as you did Regents Algebra in 8th.

I think there are ways to catch up, but I get the point that the poster was making...the idea that your child deserves to be in the top just by virtue of going to a certain school for elementary is not realistic. Life doesn't work that way yet on this board the entitlement is real, and people tend to say "I'd rather move to a good public school" or, "my child will just go to BT" and they assume that the same issues of their child not being in the top tier won't persist, and if they just move to public school their kid will get into a top Ivy. That presumption is not correct.

Her kid wasn’t just at a decent K-8. The student scored well enough on the ISEE and in his or her grades to go to a TT. Then the K-8 is telling her not to apply.

Where do median students at Buckley and St Bs and St David’s go? Genuinely curious what all that tuition and stress gets you. You know it’s not HM or Collegiate.

No one knows.

What happens if her kid got in HM from K? Would her kid stand out at HM?
What happens if her kid did get in HM 9th grade? Would her kid get in an ivy eventually?

Someone here should know where median students at K-8s people strive to get in are going.

Those what ifs aren’t the issue. The issue is performing well on every metric for years, paying a fortune, and then being told a 3T school is the best option. That’s a failure of communication

I'm not being unkind, but it's not clear that OP's child was performing well on every metric. OP reports high standardized test scores in early grades, which we all know are largely meaningless because they point to preparation/SES of the parents, not mastery or potential. She reports social issues and impulsivity problems, and says they were not academic issues, but doesn't have grades to point to. She references medium-high more recent test scores "with no prep" but then says he took them several times, which is prep!

OP asked the school if he needed tutoring, and they said no, but that's not actually the same as performing well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What shall uptown co ed are we talking about k-8? Bank street? St Hilda and st Hugh’s? Cathedral?

OP said the school doesn’t give grades. The only k-8 school I’m aware of that doesn’t give out grades is The Studio School on the UWS. And the high schools they list are, well, worth checking out. 🫥

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reality is, there aren't enough spots at T1 schools for everyone going into high schools. Why are people shocked when their kids don't get into a T1 school? And justifying their belief that they should because they've paid XXX amount of dollars...ummmm almost everyone who is around paid the same amount, and has the same belief so, why do you think your money is worth more or your child is somehow the one who should get into T1? Every parent at say St. B's wants their kid to go T1, and thought that their son getting into St. B's would ensure their top high school choice but that's impossible when people insist that only going to a list of about 5 schools will mean success. Kids will have to go to "lesser" schools, and you are not getting scammed, or cheated, if that's your kid. I get being disappointed because what you had envisioned will not pan out, but that probably wouldn't have happened at Summit High School in NJ either because you have to start tracking in the top 10% of the class in literally middle school to even be allowed to take honors and APs. Or at Bronx Science because you needed to come in having already taken Geometry to make it into the top tier of students who will even be considered for the precious spots for APs. Your kid isn't going to fail at life because they "only" got into Fieldston or Grace or Dwight.

OP isn’t upset her kid isn’t going to a TT. She’s upset that she wasn’t warned her student was on track for a mediocre school despite good grades and scores. She was misled.

Being top 10% at summit is much easier than being median at St Bs. No one at summit would get into Trinity, even if the whole class applied.

OP said the current school doesn’t give grades.