How nice or sincere are parents in elite private schools?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're not going to get objective answers here because this is the private school forum and most posters are private school types.

I will say this, though. To me, the weirdest part about private schools is that parents matter. In public schools, we don't give a shit about the parents. It's a school, not a country club.

True for many public schools, but maybe not always true for W HSs or for McLean/Langley HSs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're not going to get objective answers here because this is the private school forum and most posters are private school types.

I will say this, though. To me, the weirdest part about private schools is that parents matter. In public schools, we don't give a shit about the parents. It's a school, not a country club.

💯 this.

I’ll offer a perspective from the other side as someone who works in a private school… There are far more kind, thoughtful, and genuinely lovely families than not. Truly. Most parents are just trying to raise good humans and partner with the school, just as anywhere else.

Are there a few who feel a little… extra? Of course. But that's true in any community, public or private. The difference is they're pretty easy to spot and, frankly, easy to avoid.

[Anonymous]

Let me direct you to this thread from today:
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1318536.page

Some private school parents are lovely. Some are down to earth. Others are status-obsessed snobs who love to randomly insult other schools for not being them. You learn quickly who to befriend and who to avoid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Same as public school parents. Some are great, and some are a-holes. Some are just not your cup of tea and you aren't their's.

Yeah, but some of these schools have a higher percentage of a-holes

Yep! Just like some public schools have a higher percentage of parents who care about education than other publics. In private they all care - some are insufferable (snobby), and some are really kind.

[Anonymous]

Very hypocritical. It’s more like a country club so people would like to mingle with the rich and famous. Horrible people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are not. The one person I know at Bullis is a stone cold B. Elite level mean girl and has the extensive grotesque budget to back it up.

It’s usually the parents at lower level schools ( not top tier)that act this way. They didn’t win at getting into a good school so they have to distinguish themselves in some other way

[Anonymous]

It’s both. Ducks floating on the water with their little feet kicking like crazy under the surface.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're not going to get objective answers here because this is the private school forum and most posters are private school types.

I will say this, though. To me, the weirdest part about private schools is that parents matter. In public schools, we don't give a shit about the parents. It's a school, not a country club.

What do you mean by "parents matter"? One of the huge differences I see with my private school is parents can drop their kids off and there is no advocating, getting in front of the teacher, etc needed. We volunteer for our own socialization and not to give our kids a leg up because it's in the best interest of the school to meet the needs of all their students and for them to do well. Not true of public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that all parents are proud of their kids, this is likely more pronounced at private schools with the humble brags being presented in ways like asking questions for upcoming class registration. IT is indeed a silent race. A race for what schools accepted your child, a race for what HS accepted your child, and a race for where your child ultimately gets accepted to college. It is what it is because all the parents want the best for their kids.

It’s anxiety too. Let’s be honest.

Interesting. The schools with the wealthiest clientele (people with serious wealth) are actually the most relaxed and unbothered. They are unconcerned with getting into the best schools and what their kid decided to do with their life. Very different than upper middle class which tends to be the most cutthroat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that all parents are proud of their kids, this is likely more pronounced at private schools with the humble brags being presented in ways like asking questions for upcoming class registration. IT is indeed a silent race. A race for what schools accepted your child, a race for what HS accepted your child, and a race for where your child ultimately gets accepted to college. It is what it is because all the parents want the best for their kids.

It’s anxiety too. Let’s be honest.

Interesting. The schools with the wealthiest clientele (people with serious wealth) are actually the most relaxed and unbothered. They are unconcerned with getting into the best schools and what their kid decided to do with their life. Very different than upper middle class which tends to be the most cutthroat.

It's anyone who feels like they need to prove they fit in where they are vs. people who are confident they do. Happens in also economic brackets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are not. The one person I know at Bullis is a stone cold B. Elite level mean girl and has the extensive grotesque budget to back it up.

It’s usually the parents at lower level schools ( not top tier)that act this way. They didn’t win at getting into a good school so they have to distinguish themselves in some other way

The irony in this post is unreal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are not. The one person I know at Bullis is a stone cold B. Elite level mean girl and has the extensive grotesque budget to back it up.

It’s usually the parents at lower level schools ( not top tier)that act this way. They didn’t win at getting into a good school so they have to distinguish themselves in some other way

The irony in this post is unreal.

+1 lol

[Anonymous]

Every school is essentially the same, private or public: Some people are delightful, others not. Some are modest, others pretentious. Some are extraordinarily wealthy, others far less so. Some I hope to keep in touch with, others I hope never to interact with again. There's no magical formula or utopia.

[Anonymous]

IMO it depends a lot on the school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're not going to get objective answers here because this is the private school forum and most posters are private school types.

I will say this, though. To me, the weirdest part about private schools is that parents matter. In public schools, we don't give a shit about the parents. It's a school, not a country club.

What do you mean by "parents matter"? One of the huge differences I see with my private school is parents can drop their kids off and there is no advocating, getting in front of the teacher, etc needed. We volunteer for our own socialization and not to give our kids a leg up because it's in the best interest of the school to meet the needs of all their students and for them to do well. Not true of public.

LOLOL

- private school parent