Would you feel bad if your kid was added late to an invitation?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would decline. I would not be annoyed about my child not making the “A” list, like “boo hoo,” but I would be annoyed that you, like most people, are not aware of general standards of manners that dictate that you do not do this. Or maybe you are, but you are letting your emotion for YOUR child (“Not many people are coming so Larla will be sad at her party!”) override your common sense.


We actually have a full party. All girls invited are coming except one who has a sporting event conflict.

My daughter and my friend’s daughter will probably never be good friends. They have friends in common. I believe the girl may be on the spectrum or have some sort of other special needs. I say this to explain why her personality is difficult. Most of my daughter’s friends are very calm. Friend’s daughter tends to make situations dramatic leaving people upset.

Maybe she is difficult because you and your daughter makes it obvious she isn't really welcome.


No, the child always has to have her way. She throws tantrums. DD doesn’t like her.

Ok we will just leave guest list as is. DD didn’t want to invite her initially and still doesn’t want to invite her.

I was going to be nice and invite the new girl. We don’t have to.
Anonymous
Just don’t make the invite list public
Anonymous
For the new girl make a verbal invite or text the mom casually.
Anonymous
Invite the new girl. It's hard to be the new kid.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would decline. I would not be annoyed about my child not making the “A” list, like “boo hoo,” but I would be annoyed that you, like most people, are not aware of general standards of manners that dictate that you do not do this. Or maybe you are, but you are letting your emotion for YOUR child (“Not many people are coming so Larla will be sad at her party!”) override your common sense.


We actually have a full party. All girls invited are coming except one who has a sporting event conflict.

My daughter and my friend’s daughter will probably never be good friends. They have friends in common. I believe the girl may be on the spectrum or have some sort of other special needs. I say this to explain why her personality is difficult. Most of my daughter’s friends are very calm. Friend’s daughter tends to make situations dramatic leaving people upset.

Maybe she is difficult because you and your daughter makes it obvious she isn't really welcome.


No, the child always has to have her way. She throws tantrums. DD doesn’t like her.

Ok we will just leave guest list as is. DD didn’t want to invite her initially and still doesn’t want to invite her.

I was going to be nice and invite the new girl. We don’t have to.


Spare your "friend's" kid from your nasty, judgemental attitude.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would decline. I would not be annoyed about my child not making the “A” list, like “boo hoo,” but I would be annoyed that you, like most people, are not aware of general standards of manners that dictate that you do not do this. Or maybe you are, but you are letting your emotion for YOUR child (“Not many people are coming so Larla will be sad at her party!”) override your common sense.


We actually have a full party. All girls invited are coming except one who has a sporting event conflict.

My daughter and my friend’s daughter will probably never be good friends. They have friends in common. I believe the girl may be on the spectrum or have some sort of other special needs. I say this to explain why her personality is difficult. Most of my daughter’s friends are very calm. Friend’s daughter tends to make situations dramatic leaving people upset.

Maybe she is difficult because you and your daughter makes it obvious she isn't really welcome.


No, the child always has to have her way. She throws tantrums. DD doesn’t like her.

Ok we will just leave guest list as is. DD didn’t want to invite her initially and still doesn’t want to invite her.

I was going to be nice and invite the new girl. We don’t have to.


Spare your "friend's" kid from your nasty, judgemental attitude.


I tried to make my child invite her when we sent out the initial invitations. DD was adamant that she not come so I didn’t invite her. We have seen the family at school and holiday parties including their holiday party. I really like the mom. DD still doesn’t like their daughter.

I tried to convince DD to invite her and she said yes. DD still doesn’t want her to come not no longer objecting.

We have a full party. We don’t need to invite more people.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would decline. I would not be annoyed about my child not making the “A” list, like “boo hoo,” but I would be annoyed that you, like most people, are not aware of general standards of manners that dictate that you do not do this. Or maybe you are, but you are letting your emotion for YOUR child (“Not many people are coming so Larla will be sad at her party!”) override your common sense.


We actually have a full party. All girls invited are coming except one who has a sporting event conflict.

My daughter and my friend’s daughter will probably never be good friends. They have friends in common. I believe the girl may be on the spectrum or have some sort of other special needs. I say this to explain why her personality is difficult. Most of my daughter’s friends are very calm. Friend’s daughter tends to make situations dramatic leaving people upset.

Maybe she is difficult because you and your daughter makes it obvious she isn't really welcome.


No, the child always has to have her way. She throws tantrums. DD doesn’t like her.

Ok we will just leave guest list as is. DD didn’t want to invite her initially and still doesn’t want to invite her.

I was going to be nice and invite the new girl. We don’t have to.


Spare your "friend's" kid from your nasty, judgemental attitude.


I tried to make my child invite her when we sent out the initial invitations. DD was adamant that she not come so I didn’t invite her. We have seen the family at school and holiday parties including their holiday party. I really like the mom. DD still doesn’t like their daughter.

I tried to convince DD to invite her and she said yes. DD still doesn’t want her to come not no longer objecting.

We have a full party. We don’t need to invite more people.


Your kid doesn't like this kid. You clearly don't like the kid. Why invite her especially late? To hurt your "friend?"
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would decline. I would not be annoyed about my child not making the “A” list, like “boo hoo,” but I would be annoyed that you, like most people, are not aware of general standards of manners that dictate that you do not do this. Or maybe you are, but you are letting your emotion for YOUR child (“Not many people are coming so Larla will be sad at her party!”) override your common sense.


We actually have a full party. All girls invited are coming except one who has a sporting event conflict.

My daughter and my friend’s daughter will probably never be good friends. They have friends in common. I believe the girl may be on the spectrum or have some sort of other special needs. I say this to explain why her personality is difficult. Most of my daughter’s friends are very calm. Friend’s daughter tends to make situations dramatic leaving people upset.

Maybe she is difficult because you and your daughter makes it obvious she isn't really welcome.


No, the child always has to have her way. She throws tantrums. DD doesn’t like her.

Ok we will just leave guest list as is. DD didn’t want to invite her initially and still doesn’t want to invite her.

I was going to be nice and invite the new girl. We don’t have to.


Spare your "friend's" kid from your nasty, judgemental attitude.


I tried to make my child invite her when we sent out the initial invitations. DD was adamant that she not come so I didn’t invite her. We have seen the family at school and holiday parties including their holiday party. I really like the mom. DD still doesn’t like their daughter.

I tried to convince DD to invite her and she said yes. DD still doesn’t want her to come not no longer objecting.

We have a full party. We don’t need to invite more people.


Your kid doesn't like this kid. You clearly don't like the kid. Why invite her especially late? To hurt your "friend?"


That was my question if you would feel bad being invited late and many people would feel bad. I’m fairly certain both mom and daughter would also feel bad not being invited to the party. I don’t think the daughter would care about my daughter’s birthday but may feel left out because her other friends are coming.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would decline. I would not be annoyed about my child not making the “A” list, like “boo hoo,” but I would be annoyed that you, like most people, are not aware of general standards of manners that dictate that you do not do this. Or maybe you are, but you are letting your emotion for YOUR child (“Not many people are coming so Larla will be sad at her party!”) override your common sense.


We actually have a full party. All girls invited are coming except one who has a sporting event conflict.

My daughter and my friend’s daughter will probably never be good friends. They have friends in common. I believe the girl may be on the spectrum or have some sort of other special needs. I say this to explain why her personality is difficult. Most of my daughter’s friends are very calm. Friend’s daughter tends to make situations dramatic leaving people upset.

Maybe she is difficult because you and your daughter makes it obvious she isn't really welcome.


No, the child always has to have her way. She throws tantrums. DD doesn’t like her.

Ok we will just leave guest list as is. DD didn’t want to invite her initially and still doesn’t want to invite her.

I was going to be nice and invite the new girl. We don’t have to.


Spare your "friend's" kid from your nasty, judgemental attitude.


I tried to make my child invite her when we sent out the initial invitations. DD was adamant that she not come so I didn’t invite her. We have seen the family at school and holiday parties including their holiday party. I really like the mom. DD still doesn’t like their daughter.

I tried to convince DD to invite her and she said yes. DD still doesn’t want her to come not no longer objecting.

We have a full party. We don’t need to invite more people.


Your kid doesn't like this kid. You clearly don't like the kid. Why invite her especially late? To hurt your "friend?"


I have nothing against the kid. I sympathize for the mother because i know it is a daily struggle for small things like even going to school.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would decline. I would not be annoyed about my child not making the “A” list, like “boo hoo,” but I would be annoyed that you, like most people, are not aware of general standards of manners that dictate that you do not do this. Or maybe you are, but you are letting your emotion for YOUR child (“Not many people are coming so Larla will be sad at her party!”) override your common sense.


We actually have a full party. All girls invited are coming except one who has a sporting event conflict.

My daughter and my friend’s daughter will probably never be good friends. They have friends in common. I believe the girl may be on the spectrum or have some sort of other special needs. I say this to explain why her personality is difficult. Most of my daughter’s friends are very calm. Friend’s daughter tends to make situations dramatic leaving people upset.

Maybe she is difficult because you and your daughter makes it obvious she isn't really welcome.


No, the child always has to have her way. She throws tantrums. DD doesn’t like her.

Ok we will just leave guest list as is. DD didn’t want to invite her initially and still doesn’t want to invite her.

I was going to be nice and invite the new girl. We don’t have to.


OP's daughter is the mean girl
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would decline. I would not be annoyed about my child not making the “A” list, like “boo hoo,” but I would be annoyed that you, like most people, are not aware of general standards of manners that dictate that you do not do this. Or maybe you are, but you are letting your emotion for YOUR child (“Not many people are coming so Larla will be sad at her party!”) override your common sense.


We actually have a full party. All girls invited are coming except one who has a sporting event conflict.

My daughter and my friend’s daughter will probably never be good friends. They have friends in common. I believe the girl may be on the spectrum or have some sort of other special needs. I say this to explain why her personality is difficult. Most of my daughter’s friends are very calm. Friend’s daughter tends to make situations dramatic leaving people upset.

Maybe she is difficult because you and your daughter makes it obvious she isn't really welcome.


No, the child always has to have her way. She throws tantrums. DD doesn’t like her.

Ok we will just leave guest list as is. DD didn’t want to invite her initially and still doesn’t want to invite her.

I was going to be nice and invite the new girl. We don’t have to.


OP's daughter is the mean girl


No, I’m the one trying to make a kid invite a girl who she doesn’t like and isn’t in her class only because i like the mom.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t be offended because they’re probably not close friends but it’s a bit tacky and desperate.


+1. Get the guest list correct before it’s sent. Once it’s sent, you’re stuck.


DD wanted to invite someone who was in her class last year. Then there is a new girl. Last girl is daughter of friend of mine who DD did not originally want to invite but I convinced her to.


No to daughter of your friend. Horrible to force this on your daughter. It’s her birthday not yours. My mom did things like this and I really resented her for it. Separate your friendships from your kids’ friendships or misery will be coming your way.
Anonymous
I cannot understand why you are pushing this. It can really ruin your daughter’s party to have someone who can’t cooperate and throws tantrums. My daughter recently had her party and invited a girl she knows slightly from school who is very emotional. We had a whole talk ahead of time about if she really wanted to include this girl because my DD also knows that many of her other friends find her annoying but DD wanted include her and i told her it was her decision. She whined her way through the whole party, storming off during multiple activities and barely being able to sit through the candles on the cake because she was so annoyed that she didn’t like what my daughter had picked. I doubt my daughter will ever invite her over again. I can only imagine how she would feel if I had forced her to invite this girl against her wishes.

But to answer your question, I don’t really care about a b list invite but the kids do talk and likely will know and a girl who has a lot of tantrums is exactly the type to be offended. My daughter is in a couple different friend groups and knows there are parties she’s not invited to for more distant friends in each group, particularly now that parties tend to be smaller. It’s completely fine.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My child is having a birthday party and didn’t include some people on the original guest list. If you can see all other guests have RSVPd 2-3 weeks ago, would you be bothered that your child was invited later than the other guests?

I can’t even say it is a B list. They are just people who weren’t on the original guest list.


I wouldn't even notice and even if I did, it wouldn't bother me in the least.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:At this point I'm just happy that people make any effort.

I don't care about being B-listed and I wouldn't mention any observations to my kid.

I know people have budgets, don't have contact info, forget, whatever.

It's okay. Anybody who is offended isn't likely to be a pal in the future.


+1.
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