It’s extremely hard to raise kids in a nice neighborhood without generational wealth

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH was a big law associate when we bought our house, but only for 2 years, since he'd worked in the government for 6. But, we also only had one car (even after having a kid), a 10yo tv, and our house was so lacking in furniture that a delivery person thought it was abandoned so he didn't make the delivery.

We didn't factor my salary into anything and saved it all. We finally bought a new TV when my BIL showed up, aghast. Nearly 25 years later, we are not spendthrifts, but not at all frugal like that. But saving during our early years set us up big time.

This is 100% us except replace big law associate with big tech lobbyist. Glad to hear it gets better as the savings accumulate!

[Anonymous]

The fancy home isn’t going to make you happier. That’s an inside job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We bought at $2M under 35 (still under 35). Our HHI is around 750k, no parent contributions. We also pay for our nanny and private school on our own. It’s tight (seriously, no complaints though, we made our choices and know where we can cut back if needed) but we don’t spend much besides on the house and kids.

This is crazy to me as someone your age ish who makes the same. I had no idea people in our income bracket were stretching this much to “have it all.”

This is not crazy. 3x gross is not stretching. At least, it should not be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We bought at $2M under 35 (still under 35). Our HHI is around 750k, no parent contributions. We also pay for our nanny and private school on our own. It’s tight (seriously, no complaints though, we made our choices and know where we can cut back if needed) but we don’t spend much besides on the house and kids.

This is crazy to me as someone your age ish who makes the same. I had no idea people in our income bracket were stretching this much to “have it all.”

This is not crazy. 3x gross is not stretching. At least, it should not be.

Sure. But 3x gross plus a nanny plus private school for multiple kids is 100% stretching on $750K and the PP admitted it’s tight.

[Anonymous]

Posts like these affirm my belief that the unaffordability of homes is bogus.
There are affordable homes. People just don't want to live in Arlandria or Hyattsville. Every family is doing their level best to avoid living next to lower socio-demographics and overstretching themselves to attain what they feel they are entitled to.
As a child of immigrants who ended up at top tier schools, I have seen those two worlds and the blithe non-existance of the have-nots in the eyes of the haves. And boy, do those who have try so very hard to avoid the world of the have-nots that they try to blind themselves to. My peers are deeply shocked when they learn where I grew up - South Arlington.

So people wait a good 10-15 years to have kids at their earnings peak because they wouldn't want to raise kids in a lower tier neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

We live in a nice neighborhood in Loudoun. Easily half the price (or less) than something comparable in Bethesda.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We live in a nice neighborhood in Loudoun. Easily half the price (or less) than something comparable in Bethesda.

What’s your point?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We live in a nice neighborhood in Loudoun. Easily half the price (or less) than something comparable in Bethesda.

What’s your point?

I think the point is that it's not tht hard to raise your kids in a "nice neighborhood". It's hard to raise your kids in a single family house in s a "nice neighborhood" that's full of rich people and close to the city. Those last two things don't make the neighborhood "nicer", but they sure make it more expensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We live in a nice neighborhood in Loudoun. Easily half the price (or less) than something comparable in Bethesda.

What’s your point?

DP
Probably that one doesn’t have to live in the likes of Bethesda or McLean to raise kids in a “nice neighborhood”. But really, what do I know? I’m in a “bootyhole” West Springfield neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

People buy these homes after their kids are in middle school/high school. Not when their kids haven't been born yet.

[Anonymous]

Weird post. Our parents had nothing. We bought a starter home at age 31 in Prince George’s county and started our family. After saving aggressively for 8 years, we then bought a house in a good school district in Bethesda.
Have people forgotten the concept of a starter home? Most of my neighbors do not have generational wealth (although there are some I know do). The ones with generational wealth are much more likely to send their kids to private schools and waste money on stuff like country club memberships and ski trips out west, or long term summer rentals in rehobeth because that’s how they grew up. The rest of us are more pragmatic in how we spend our money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We live in a nice neighborhood in Loudoun. Easily half the price (or less) than something comparable in Bethesda.

What’s your point?

DP
Probably that one doesn’t have to live in the likes of Bethesda or McLean to raise kids in a “nice neighborhood”. But really, what do I know? I’m in a “bootyhole” West Springfield neighborhood.

OP never said that only Bethesda and McLean contain nice neighborhoods.

[Anonymous]

Why do you need to buy a 2 to 3 million dollar house? We bought a half a million dollar house at age 30 in a good school district. Our kids are happy. Our house has gone up in value considerably. We could now afford a million dollar house, but dont need or want it.

[Anonymous]

Most of the posters in this thread responding negatively to OP about how they did this in their late 30s or 40s missed the key part of OP's original post which is the focus on people under 35 buying $2-3M+ homes.

Of course if you save for 15-20 years and get paid a lot and maybe inherit a bit too you can buy that high.

OP was focused on those doing it BEFORE 35 which seems like a much narrower pool. Eg even if you're a big law partner, that isn't kicking in until 35 at the earliest. Lobbyists also don't hit close to $1M until mid/late 30s. Tech $ / appreciating RSUs will get you there but we don't have a critical mass of that in the DC area.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re conflating the value of homes in a neighborhood with the value of the neighbors. Teachers, nurses, firefighters, etc., may not live in the most expensive neighborhoods, but I’d be thrilled to have them as neighbors. Moreover, even the most expensive neighborhoods aren’t immune from crime.

I am a middle-aged nurse living in a DMV zip code with even higher price-per-sq-ft homes than Bethesda or McLean.

It’s actually not great living among the newer arrival millennials who get to buy a $2.8M colonial because Dad set up a trust fund. They tend to be Zach/Emilys with vocal fry (both sexes, yuck) and a poor grasp of community. They outsource absolutely everything and their kids are socially awkward due to being raised by cheap help.