It’s extremely hard to raise kids in a nice neighborhood without generational wealth
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Anonymous
Lucky you! I didn’t know that parents helped with down payments until I was in my late 20s and saw it happening for friends. My spouse and I are high earners and this is definitely one of our financial goals. Giving our kids no school debt + a down payment is such a head start in life. |
Anonymous
Children without parents able or willing to pay for school or to help with a home purchase can still do fine if they make sensible decisions and choices. Obtaining an affordable education rather than incurring debt is one path often not taken by those who complain about their financial position. Obtaining a relatively useless education which predictably won't result in highly compensated employment is another. Seeking out jobs in fields which pay poorly is obviously self-defeating in terms of financial well-being. Taking on rent or mortgage payments which exceed a reasonable percentage of income leads to reduced savings and investments, no matter how much you don't want to live in less expensive housing. |
Anonymous
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I hate the term "generational wealth'. I feel like this is all we hear about these days.
Are people done with building their OWN wealth??? |
Anonymous
My parents paid for school, including law school, and bought me a car. We can't do that for our kids because DH is supporting both of his parents right now, and it's a huge drain. I've got 529 plans covered for any undergrad (I had to set up direct paycheck contributions so they are out of sight, out of mind to DH), and if they make a sensible choice, they would have some left over for grad school. Moral of the story: figure out when you're dating if your partner intends to support their parents and at what cost. Don't be surprised, then resentful, like I was. |
Anonymous
You would have made him a huge favour by marrying someone rich like you instead. |
Anonymous
If you can simply help with college and encourage them to go somewhere they won't end up with more than the $27K federal loans for undergrad, you have given them a huge advantage. They can pay that off in 3-4 years (or less). I personally don't understand why anyone would take massive loans to attend college. It puts you in a deep hole that can be challenging to dig out of. |
Anonymous
+1 Affordable education is the key. There is absolutely no reason to take more than the federal student loan amount of ~$27K total for the 4 years. Your kid can earn $10-12K/year to contribute, take the ~$5-6K of loans yearly and that leaves the parents with $10-15K for state U. If they cannot manage that (don't have any saved) then you search for merit. My 1220/3.5UW/No AP kid could have attended our "2nd State U" for $20K with the merit they got. And they attended a T100 school (had 3 with similar offers) that only cost us $40K/year (5 years ago--merit awards would make it similar costs still). But they could have attended 2-3 instate schools for under $20K, that my kid could have almost paid for themselves with student loans and working (summer/breaks/10 hours PT during the year). Had we needed the $$, they could have done it even cheaper, they simply didn't search for merit as it wasn't needed. |
Anonymous
Well most with "generational wealth" go on to continuing building wealth. Sure there are a few losers who just live off a trust, but vast majority of kids who have parents who fully pay for college, give them first cars and downpayment for a home were simply setup to excel in life. They grew up expecting to do just that, so the financial assistance is just a means to ensure they can easily excel at life. But most that I know are still high earners and have high goals for their careers. It's what you have grown up being expected to do. |
Anonymous
yes, definately figure out what your future spouse plans to do with their parents. I agree, you need to help your parents if you can, but your own immediate family should come first and if you cannot afford to fund your parents, then you don't |
Anonymous
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We live in McLean and completely self made. We grew up poor immigrants, worked hard and now earn a seven figure income.
Our first home was a 300k house in New Haven, CT. We then bought a $900k home in DC and eventually bought a $2m home in mclean that is now worth 4m. |
Anonymous
This isn’t new. There is nothing about this that is new. |
Anonymous
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I don’t see why it’s so hard. I mean, yeah, our college and graduate school was fully paid for and my wife received a down payment on our first house from my in-laws. Plus our wedding was fully paid for and we receive annual gifting up to the limit from both sets of parents. Isn’t this normal?
We’re just two working professionals with kids that made it on our own and bought in these places in our early 30s. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| I started from humble beginnings. Worked hard and invested in individual companies. No Ivy League education with the connections, not a lawyer, not a doctor, not a business owner, not an OF contributor. Just smart and lucky investing. I’m now 42 yo and NW is $25M+ (~$11M in a Roth). |
Anonymous
Duh? |