Is there more to life than just work?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Life is also much more than playing pickleball, piano, and guitar, and working out. You need $ in order to afford a certain quality of life. Most people realize that maximizing employment potential early on in a career is key to achieving a higher income and more job satisfaction sooner rather than later. Applying the brakes early will give you more free time, and a permanently impaired earning capacity, which will impact you for the rest of your life.

Maybe you're a person who can be content with little $; I'm told they exist. Most people, however, prefer more $ to less, and find a way to balance the requirements of a demanding professional life against a reasonable amount of leisure.

Early on, leisure should take a back seat in that juggling act, but should still be there even if at a modest level. Over time, as you become wealthier and more financially secure, you can slowly change the relative balance of work to leisure, and your leisure time will be enhanced by your greater wealth - you can have nicer possessions, nicer vacations, and more financial security. That last consideration is arguably the most important of all. It may enable you to retire earlier than would otherwise have been possible, at which point your quality of life could potentially increase exponentially when compared to needing to work many more years because you took a professional off-ramp early on and were permanently relegated to a lower level of income and, probably, job satisfaction. I certainly was happier at work the higher i rose in the organization - money, respect, power, flexibility, all come with professional achievement. You can tell other people what to do, instead of always being on the receiving end.

I’d argue most people don’t realize this. Plenty of hard working people focus way more on savings and maxing out a 401k, then they do climbing the ladder. But the latter will often result in better returns. I did a terrible job saving in my 20s but I’m now in my 40s with a high earning and flexible job. Now it’s easy for me to throw $100-200k a year into investments.

I was a highly educated passion job follower, making the world better and doing interesting work

Should have focused on money. It all becomes a slog.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your health is more important than this work. You don’t want to drop dead from a heart attack in your 20s

Are you a man or a woman? I feel many woman downshift because they always have the breadwinner ripcord.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Reach out to your parents for help if possible.

I would visit my DS/DS, once every 2-3 weeks to sort out cleaning, laundry, freeze ready to eat meals and generally make things easier for my adult kids.

Please tell me you’re kidding.

Not at all. I did it for my DS and nephew who were their doing residency together. My dad and mom were also living close by and I was going there frequently to help them out, so it just made sense to help out my son and nephew too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your health is more important than this work. You don’t want to drop dead from a heart attack in your 20s

Are you a man or a woman? I feel many woman downshift because they always have the breadwinner ripcord.

They have kids. Then they have to downshift.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP .

I'm working at a fast-paced AI company where the development team puts in 12 to 14 hours a day, not including the commute. We're required to be in the office four days a week. There are ten of us on the team, all between 23 and 29 years old. My team lead practically lives at the office. Seven out of ten of us are overweight now—including me—and the stress is taking a serious toll. While the pay and stock options are great, it's hard to enjoy any of it. The company is aiming to be acquired by another AI company in the next two years, so everyone is hanging on in the hope of a big payout. One colleague already quit because he couldn’t handle the stress, and I feel like I’m not far behind. I'm completely drained by the time I get home. My typical day starts at 6:30 a.m. and doesn’t end until 9 p.m., followed by a 30-minute commute, dinner, and checking emails from the team. I’m in bed by 11:30 p.m., up again at 5:45 a.m., and out the door by 6. Every day feels like Groundhog Day.

PP - the CISO again.

I'd be really cautious about leaning too heavily on the stock options. You likely have no idea what their eventual value is going to be. It could be big or it could be nothing. I've been there with big dreams of a massive payout only to be left with relatively little. The AI space is obviously hot right now, but EVERYBODY is building to get bought, and there are only so many buyers. You may be one of the lucky ones, but I wouldn't count on it.

When you say you're well comped, what are your numbers?

[Anonymous]

Sorry, OP. This one is on you. You need to find the time to destress, exercise and eat properly in your work day.

You are a fairly smart person to go to college and get your education. So you know what you need to do to have good health, correct diet and exercise and adequate sleep.

Without adequate rest, you will really keel over and die of a heart-attack.

[Anonymous]

My kid interned at one of well known tech company and he put on weight in two months because he ate like he used to do in college - without the exercise and rest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your health is more important than this work. You don’t want to drop dead from a heart attack in your 20s

Are you a man or a woman? I feel many woman downshift because they always have the breadwinner ripcord.

They have kids. Then they have to downshift.

Many downshift before kids don’t worry.

[Anonymous]

What's the upside to your work, is it just high salary? Is it a startup with a big upside where you are also a shareholder? It's still risky, but at least the motivation for you is like that of a part owner where you cash out big if it sells. Otherwise you have to calculate how much you are saving and how much you can invest (given you have limited time/energy to invest with high growth rate) to have a good chunk saved for shifting gears later. Also, experience matters if you are learning something that's really hot and can benefit you to set you on a high trajectory later. Learn as much as you can, save all you can and then roll. However much time you can sustain it. You don't want to live your life feeling like it's a prison sentence, which is how you describe it now.

[Anonymous]

Maybe it will all be more bearable if you have a plan and a timetable. That way you have some sort of finish line to go after and source of motivation.
At least you are being well compensated. I knew so many people in my field who were pulling similar hours at their first big jobs but the pay is crap to non-existent (starchitecture). And there was no cash out at the end, just more clients who don't think your service is worth the price.

[Anonymous]

I think you need a mentor. Or at least see how other people in similar circumstances adapted. Workers at Tezla for instance. Can you reach out to them through LinkedIn? Or internet search how they survive.

You know you are in a great position—do not give it up so easily. I do think you have some maturing to do. Stop thinking like a college student. As a new mother in the US where it is not common to have support, I could not just give up even though raising an infant was taxing physically, mentally, and emotionally, to say the least. Yet all of us get through it. You can too. Don’t act like there is an eject button. What is your goal?

I agree with PPs about setting yourself up for success. Outsource everything, do stairs every hour, eat grapefruit/eat light. Pray, go out in nature, call friends when you can. Good luck to you.